If You Want Blood
by MonsterSlut
Summary: It's hard...struggling to keep a hold of the last scrap of humanity that I have left in this deadly, new world, Ebony and Jade are always there, always reminding me that I am human and not a monster but with the ever constant threat of walkers behind every bush, ever tree, every corner, they won't be there for much longer...my name is PJ and this is my story of life after death...
1. Chapter 1

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or an affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**One**

Screaming…I can always hear screaming…in my dreams and in waking…these days it's hard to tell the two apart. The gnashing of teeth and the growling, I see them when I close my eyes, hear them when I cover my ears, they're everywhere, we'll never be safe, they will never stop hunting us, the slightest sound, the slightest movement to give us away and we're done for.

Movement…I can hear movement.

Footsteps dragging across the wooden floorboards of the cabin we had taken shelter in last night. Instinct kicks in, a lifetime of living with six brothers and eight years in the marines takes over, I grabbed my bowie knife out from underneath my pillow and sit upright, holding it out, ready to stab the walker in the head.

The walker screamed.

Wait-I stopped-walkers don't scream. I dropped the knife to rub my eyes and take her in my arms. "Poor rabbit," I whispered, trying to sooth her. This world is no longer safe for anyone, especially children like her. I felt a pang in my heart as I stared into those gorgeous blue eyes all I could think of is how unlucky she was to be living in a world like this. I kissed her head, "I'm sorry rabbit, I whispered. "Where's your mother, Jade?"

She shrugged. "I dunno."

I ruffled her golden blonde curls with a soft smile. It was sad knowing that my little rabbit would most likely die before she hit the age of five if we weren't careful, supplies were dwindling and with three mouths to feed I was forced to go out hunting for longer expecting the worse when I returned back to our camp. "Get in the cupboard and hide," I ordered, swinging my legs over the edge of the bed and standing up at the same time I grabbed my knife off the floor.

Sprinting out of the bedroom I squatted down low behind the door as it opened up and more footsteps penetrated the silence. The door slammed shut and I watched a pair of brown leather boots walk across the room before I swung my leg out, knocking her to the floor with a mighty thump.

"Dang it PJ!" she grumbled, lying there on the dusty wood.

I stood up and offered her a hand. "Eyes open, Ebony. I could have been a walker."

"Oh you're going to be a walker in a minute," growled Ebony Hewitt as she dusted off her filthy jeans. "I was just getting water from the stream if you must know. I put the canteens in the jeep, they're ready for boiling whenever we want to use them." She stared at me through her dark brown eyes, "how much longer do you think we can stay here?" she questioned. "Where is Jade?"

"You can come out now," I called out to Jade, hitting the wall three times. It was our little code we had, three taps means come on out, it's safe.

Jade came running out and crashed into her mother. "You were gone a really, really, long time," she whispered with all the strength a four year old could muster without crying in fear.

I had picked up Ebony and Jade Hewitt in New York City on day five of total wildfire, both of them hiding in some shambled apartment almost about to get eaten by a walker. Ebony was a Registered Nurse, used to fixing broken bones and healing cuts, not killing the dead. She had a daughter who was in love with every single Disney princess in the history of Disney, even the ones who weren't really princesses. Well, when I say picked up I didn't mean picked up like a sack of potatoes, Ebony and I had been friends since Jade was only three months old. I was on my way back from six months training with the Australian Special Forces and after twelve straight hours of partying I'd spent the whole trip back to New York past out beside her and practically giving her alcohol poisoning from the fumes that were apparently coming off me-or so she says to this very day.

"PJ?" Ebony repeated. "How much longer can we stay here?" she asked me.

"Two days, three at best," I answered, looking out the window. "I might go hunting today, see if I can find anything, maybe even check the highway out again, see what else I can find. You gonna be ok here with Jade?"

Ebony nodded. "Yeah, we'll be fine. Listen, you know how I feel about you going through dead people's stuff-"

I rolled my eyes at her.

"-but if you could find any books for Jade to read I would be most grateful," Ebony whispered. "Just because society has crumbled doesn't mean my daughter stops learning."

"You'd be better off teaching her how to hunt and protect herself," I lectured her. "I love my rabbit but she's gonna die if we don't teach her to protect herself.

Ebony ignored me. I can't blame her though, this dream world that she was living in was so much better than the real world. I marched into the back room and started gearing up for a long hunt, I would probably be gone for at least a day, tomorrow I'd spent the day skinning and gutting and smoking the meat of what I caught then we'd probably leave. Ebony laughed at me as I headed out the door, she always did seeing me with my hood over my head, it helped me focus on the target ahead of me since I only ever fought in long range when it came to dealing with walkers. Long range combat had been my speciality in the Marine Corps, I was a fantastic sniper up until the point I had to but a bullet in the brain of my spotter when he tried to kill me. But that was the state of the world these days, friends are forced to kill friends. One of these days I would be forced to kill either Ebony or Jade or they would be forced to kill me. Survival rates in this world weren't exactly the best.

I kissed Jade on the head and headed out the door into the crisp morning air. We'd made it as far as the outer regions of Atlanta, in fact I was pretty sure that there was a farm nearby but I had a rule-no people. Ebony hated that rule, we'd argue for hours about hooking up with another group but I was always against it. The closest we'd gotten was joining a group in a quarry not too far from the city but I was against it because it was too close to the city, Ebony didn't talk to me for days after that, I tell you it was pretty awkward when it's two adults and one child.

For the rest of the morning I followed several tracks throughout the woods, catching a couple of rabbits and some squirrels. As I prepared to start the track towards the highway and lug back another ten litre jug of water I heard a scream. It wasn't coming from the direction of the cabin but from a small stream nearby.

I loaded an arrow in my bow and took off at a slow run, following the noise.

Expecting a walker to burst out of the bushes, I was prepped and ready to fire, only it was a child. A small girl, around the age of eleven burst through the bushes clutching to a doll like it was her life. When she saw me, she screamed.

"Shut up!" I hissed, grabbing her and covering her mouth to stop her from screaming. There were walkers in these woods and if I let her keep screaming like this, she would bring them all down on us. "I stared into her frightened eyes, "I'm gonna move my hand kid, and you're not gonna scream or I will leave you to the walkers."

She nodded.

I removed my hand. "Take these," I ordered her, shoving the dead animals over her shoulder. "Follow me and stay quiet." She followed me, the fear was written all over her face but she followed me anyway. Ebony would love another little girl for Jade to play with but all I could think of was how it was just another mouth to feed and more importantly, it was just another walker waiting to happen.


	2. Chapter 2

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Two**

Ebony's reaction was exactly what I thought it would be when I brought the girl back to the cabin with us. She immediately started coddling the girl, offering her food and something to drink from our dwindling supplies which she immediately scoffed up.

Jade took to the girl just as quick as Ebony did, it was the first time in months that I had seen my rabbit this excited. She was happy for another kid to be around, so happy that she immediately burst in a barrage of questions-well as many questions as a four-year-old could think of without repeating herself. I laughed, in the game of twenty million questions, Jade had managed to stick in a question about who her favourite Disney princess was. She kept asking me that same question but as a kid I played with cars and fire crackers, not hopes and dreams.

I set about skinning the animals and bottling the blood for later use. The blood was good to draw away the walkers from the place that you wanted to go. I had used it several times and so far it was a huge success.

"That stinks," Ebony grumbled, announcing her presence to me as she sat down beside me. "The girl's asleep. You did the right thing, PJ, by bringing her here."

I snorted at her and continued cutting the rabbit meat from the bone.

Ebony rolled her eyes at me. "You're a horrible, human being, you know?" she told me. "The girls name is Sophia Peletier, she said that she was travelling with a group of survivors but they were separated on the highway. She said that walkers were chasing her. Poor thing cried herself to sleep."

I snorted a second time. "She was probably making a racket and drew the walkers to her." I stabbed my knife down on the table, "did she say where about on the highway she left them?" I asked, formulating some kind of an idea in my head. If I could get the girl back to her group before we left then maybe I could barter for some supplies in trade for the girl. My intentions weren't the best nor where they the most honest but I was doing all I could for Ebony and Jade, I owed no one anything else.

"Sophia said something about them being on the highway not too far away from the sign on the road that you follow to that farm you won't let us go to," Ebony answered.

I sighed. "I'll get some supplies and go back out there, search for the girls group."

"You've been up for five days straight!" Ebony argued. "You haven't slept, you're not eating so that Jade and I can eat, and honestly PJ you look like a dang racoon with those black rings around your eyes." She folded her arms, "come on, PJ sleep for a couple of hours and then go out looking for the group in the morning."

I cleaned my knife off on the bloodied rag and winked at her. "What are you talking about?" I asked her with a laugh. "I did sleep."

"An hour doesn't count," Ebony growled at me. "PJ-please you need to rest otherwise your body will start to shut down. Eventually you'll become a walker if you don't start taking care of yourself."

I grabbed the compound bow out of the back of the Jeep. "Do you have anything of the girl's that I can use sort of as a goodwill gesture?"

Ebony pulled Sophia's doll out of the back of her jeans and held it out to me. "I knew you'd be going out, you're a stubborn git, you know that?"

"It's my stubbornness that's keeping us alive," I told her, checking my weapons for easy access. "I'm gonna trade the girl for some supplies, hopefully they'll have medicine. It will be winter in the next few months, I don't want Jade to get sick. It would break what's left of my heart if I had to put that little girl down, you know that. Sophia Peletier is the best chance we've got of making sure Jade doesn't die."

"A group is the best chance," she started on me again. "You know it is!"

"I'm not having this argument with you again, Ebony," I replied.

"Too late, we're having it!" Ebony snapped. "I don't understand why you don't want to be a part of a group, a group can provide us safety."

"And I can't?" I snapped back at her.

"You can barely keep yourself awake!" she growled. "You won't let me help, is it some stupid, soldier sense of pride or something? You're gonna get yourself killed adhering to some stupid code of honour trying to protect us. PJ you cry out in your sleep when you manage to get it. You need someone watching you're back. You don't trust anyone."

"If you wanna join a group then be my guest," I told her coldly. "Just don't expect me to follow you blindly. My code keeps me safe, you never trust what you don't know, Ebony and that is what has kept us alive, kept you and Jade alive." I picked up a bottle of blood and strung it to my belt, "I'll drop this about a mile or so away from the cabin in a circular pattern, tomorrow we're leaving. And for the record, I trust you, Eb's."

Not wanting to give Ebony the chance to argue with me, I headed down the overgrown path, leaving my best friend to look after the two girls. Finding my way to the highway was easy, finding any sign of people was easier still. Sophia's group had been there alright, they had gone through a number of cars looking for supplies and weapons. As I walked through the convoy of broken down and deserted cars I scribbled some notes down on a notepad, marking the supplies I could take and where they were until eventually I came across a shit box pale yellow car with some food and water, a blanket and a torch on the hood. There was a note written in white pain on the windscreen-SOPHIA, STAY HERE, WE WILL COME EVERY DAY-I raised the torch and smashed the windscreen before stashing the supplies in my pack and continuing on down the road. Sophia wasn't going to need them, I kept telling myself. I headed down the road and back into the bushes again, following the tracks of a size thirteen set of standard issue police boots down the side of the embankment. The tracks were easy to follow, whoever owned the boots had left a trail that was easy to follow-hell even Ebony could follow this trail through the bush.

I followed the trail through the bush for at least a mile before I stopped for a break-as it turns out, worst mistake of my life.

I cracked open a bottle of water and sat down on the rock to take a sip. Take away the flesh eating monsters and you had yourself an ideal afternoon hike like I used to take with my family. I looked around quickly the moment I hear a kind of wiping sound and jumped up off my rock just in time for me to be thrown backwards into the water of the stream. Pain ripped through my whole body, echoing up from my abdomen, I looked down to see a crossbow arrow sticking out of my stomach. I wanted to scream out in pain but screaming would draw walkers and wounded I didn't need that sort of problem.

I heart footsteps in the dirt, looking up I saw some kind of rough looking farm hand leading a horse out of the brush. I struggled up and grabbed my bowie out of my boot, groaning in pain, I could feel my blood soaking through my clothes and running into the stream. My attacker loaded his crossbow and aimed it at me. I could hear him speaking but everything was blurry.

I blinked, rubbing my eyes, trying to make him out…eventually everything just went black and that was the last thing I remembered.


	3. Chapter 3

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Three**

_"Corporal Lucas," came the annoying drawl of the flight attending, breaking through my alcohol induced state of depravity, "can you please move your feet off the seat?"_

_I looked up over my pair of silver aviator glasses through a pair of bloodshot emerald eyes at the young flight attendant and smirked. Standing behind him was a woman around the same age as myself holding a baby dressed in a white jumpsuit with a white rose headband around her tiny head that made my smirk vanish. "Are you fucking kidding me?" I grumbled, staring at the woman. "A freaking baby? Seriously, Gerry, are you trying to kill me?"_

_Gerry the Flight Attendant cleared his throat. "I'm sorry Corporal Lucas but this was the only other seat available and no one is willing to change with Miss Hewitt."_

_"Wonder why?" I grumbled, staring at the baby. "Sweetie-word of advice, a pooping vomit machine is a hell of a way to drive away the fellas." I pulled my feet off the seat and thumped my head down on the covered window beside me as my new friend sat down with Gerry's help after she stowed the baby bag. I smirked when she wrinkled her nose at me, smelling the alcohol I was pretty sure I had been sprayed with when the hostess sprayed us all with the beer tap._

_"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain James Wilson speaking," came a voice over the PA system, "we'll be taking off shortly, if you could please turn your attention to the lovely cabin crew and they will bring you up to speed on the proper procedures that need to be followed in a time of emergency."_

_I cocked my head up a little and watched the cabin crew complete their rehearsed demonstration. I'd had fun last night, spending my final night in Australia with some of the local soldier boys, they sure knew how to send a girl off that's for sure. And for the record, I now love the words pub crawl._

_"Keep that thing quiet?" I growled at her when the baby when it started to fuss. _

_She stared at me with disgust. "She's a baby! You're disgusting!"_

_"Says you, Betty," I laughed. With that short hair she kinda reminded me of Betty Boop._

_"My name is Ebony!" she hissed. "Not Betty!"_

_"Whatever," I shrugged, slinking back in my seat. "Just keep that baby thing at a minimum and I won't vomit over you-deal?"_

* * *

When I opened my eyes, everything was blurry, nothing had shape or substance. I felt like I had something covering my eyes, like some sort of clear mask. I groaned in pain and struggled to sit up, propping myself up on my elbows was hard enough, sitting up was gonna be hell.

"Take it easy," came a heavy southern drawl. Someone pushed down on my shoulder, "You lost a lot of blood. We had to stitch you up to stop the bleeding. Do you know where you are?"

"Ebony…?" I whispered, calling out to my friend in a hoarse whisper. "Ebony?!"

"There's no one here by the name," he told me. "Can you tell me your name? You've been out for two days, you know?"

Two days?!

I rubbed my eyes and tried to sit up again, this time I could make him out. He was wearing a white shirt with a pair of jeans and size thirteen boots, his jaw was stubborn and his brow told me that he had a lot on his mind, he also sported a slight scruffy beard. "Where's Ebony?" I coughed.

He handed me a bottle of water. "Should I call you Corporal Lucas?" he asked me. "Or is it PJ? I got your name off your dog tags-where you a soldier?"

"Where's Ebony?" I asked again, this time at a yell.

"Where did you get this doll?" he demanded to know, shoving Sophia's doll in my face. "Tell me, where did you get this doll?"

"Where's Ebony?" I yelled, launching myself out of bed, knocking the southerner off his chair and to the ground with an almighty thump. I screamed in pain when I felt the stitches rip open and rolled off him, onto the floor. "Ebony!" I yelled out, footsteps echoing up the stairs.

"Where did you get the doll?" he yelled at me, shoving it in my face. "Where's Sophia?!"

Everything blacked out again.

* * *

_A few days after meeting that annoyingly happy mother and her freaking little pink creature that people called a baby I was at Walmart shopping for groceries to refill my sad little cupboards only to bump into them. _

_The girl Ebony and her 'sweet' little sleeping baby were in the isle where the bread was with two elderly people, one of which was pushing a trolley. Since I needed bread it was kinda hard to ignore them. "Good afternoon, Ebony," I frowned, pushing passed her to get to the multigrain bread. _

_She jumped when she saw me. "Oh-hello Corporal Lucas."_

_"Call me PJ," I replied. "Listen-I wanted to apologise for my behaviour on the plane the other day."_

_No I didn't. I was drunk and the Aussie boys gave me a fantastic going away party and I enjoyed it way too much-so much so I almost missed my flight. _

_"Are you going to introduce us to your friend?" the elderly woman asked. _

_"Corporal PJ Lucas," I introduced myself as. "Ebony and I met on the plane over."_

_"Nice to meet you Corporal Lucas," the elderly man smiled. "Jeff Heart and this here is my wife Millie. Ebony doesn't have very many friends-maybe you could come over for dinner?"_

_I frowned. "Um-dinner?"_

_Seriously I had a bottle of vodka in the freezer with my name on it-literally it had my name on it written by a sharpie._

_I sighed. "Fine-dinner."_

_"Six thirty?" Millie asked me. She didn't wait for my answer as she scribbled her address down. "Bring just yourself."_

_"Yes ma'am," I fake smiled, imitating their Brooklyn accent. _

_She handed me the address to some part of Brooklyn I would need a taxi to get me there, like most New Yorkers I've never stepped foot in Brooklyn my whole life._

_Ebony gripped the stroller and turned away from me leaving me alone with my bread. _

* * *

The next time I woke up I found him still sitting there in the same chair beside the bed. Sophia's doll was in his lap and he was reading a book. I could sit up this time, he waited until I sat against the headboard of the bed before he threw the doll down on the bed. I picked the doll up, of course they'd gone through my pack.

"Where's Sophia?" he asked me.

"You're tune sucks," I told him. "Where's Sophia? Where's Sophia? Where's Sophia? Do I get a how you feeling or an apology for shooting me? Or maybe even a name? Or do I just call you size thirteen?"

He sighed. "It's Rick, Rick Grimes. What's your name?"

"Why ask it?" I answered. "You already saw my dog tags."

"I wanna hear it from you," Rick told me, grey eyes searching me for any clue to where the girl was.

"Corporal PJ Lucas," I answered. "That's my name. And yeah, I know where the girl is."

He jumped out of his seat and grabbed the doll off me. "Where is she?" he yelled. "Where's Sophia?"

"I'm not gonna tell you," I replied. I looked down at the wound on my stomach, I knew that there was no way in hell I was gonna be able to protect Ebony and Jade wounded like this.

"Where's Sophia?" Rick yelled, inches away from my face.

I shook my head, "I told you I wasn't gonna tell you…" I stared him down, "I'll show you."


	4. Chapter 4

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Four**

Our track back to the cabin was silent and very long with me having to stop every ten minutes to rest because of my wound. Rick and the assbutt who had shot me-his name was Daryl Dixon-came with me, I guess you could say it was because they didn't trust me but the gods honest truth was that I didn't trust them either. But Rick didn't seem to be the type of guy who would turn out a woman and a child-he'd probably turn me out on my ass given the chance.

Once I was fully awake, showered and fed, I was suddenly attacked with a barrage of questions about anything and everything that I had done since the world went to shit. They all wanted to know where I had been, what I had done, how I had survived and most importantly where Sophia was. There was no way in hell I was gonna give that information up least it cost Ebony and my rabbit their lives.

Rick had given me my weapons back against the wishes of the group, especially his partner, Shane Walsh, who had a whole choice range of names for me. Shane wanted to force the information out of me but Rick wasn't ready to go that far-it was men like Shane who made me fear joining groups, not for my sake but for the sake of Ebony and my rabbit.

Before we'd left for the cabin, Rick told me everything that they'd done whilst searching for Sophia-apparently they'd been searching for her for three days thinking she'd been killed. Her mother was beside herself with worry, I'd seen her once back at the farmhouse crying as a man called Herschel was checking my stitches before we left. A blonde by the name of Andrea had told me that if I was planning to stick around, I should weigh out my other options first before she spilled just about everything about this little group I was looking to join. She had told me about 'Lady Grimes' aka Rick's wife and how she had quickly taken over as what Andrea had coldly described as first lady of their little group and had done since day one. She was also pretty sure that she and Shane had been sleeping together since the world ended. I don't mean to judge-ok yeah I do-but she sounded pretty bitter about something and it wasn't just Rick's wife.

There was a few walkers on the way back to the cabin which somehow developed into a small competition between Daryl and I as to who could take out the walkers quicker.

As we approached the cabin I held my hand out to stop Rick and Daryl from walking into the line of fire. Ebony wasn't that great with a gun but she was good enough to cause some serious harm to a human. I wet my lips and let out a three whistle burst then waited for another three whistles to answer me back.

Ebony slammed the door open as we walked up to the cabin. "Philomena Jocelyn Lucas where the bloody hell have you been?" she snapped before she slapped me. "I was worried sick!" She hugged me tightly, causing pain to echo through my body. I gasped, forcing her away from me and when I held my side she stared daggers at both Rick and Daryl. "What the hell happened? Are you wounded? Did a walker get you? Who are they? Where have you been?"

"It's ok," I replied with a pained laugh. "Where's Sophia and the rabbit?"

"Hiding," Ebony replied. She looked at Rick and Daryl a second time. "What happened? Did they hurt you?"

"Sophia!" Daryl shouted, breaking the silence.

From inside the cabin I heard Jade yell something at Sophia before both girls came running out. Jade clung to Ebony's leg, "I tried to stop her mama but she wouldn't listen."

Sophia threw herself at Rick and burst into tears. Rick dropped to his knees and hugged the little girl closely. "Thank you," he whispered at me, tears in his eyes. I couldn't help but wonder, given what Andrea had told me Rick had only been with their group for about nine days.

Ebony rubbed Jade's head. "I know baby girl," she whispered. She looked back at me, "who are they?" she asked me.

"That's Officer Rick Grimes," I answered, pointing at the kneeling sheriff, "and the assbutt with the crossbow is Daryl-he shot me."

"You shot her?" Ebony screamed at him. "Did your mother ever teach you to think before you act? You're an idiot," she snapped before she slapped him.

Rick and I both stared at Ebony. She was about five foot nothing with a petite frame-never have I seen her act violent towards anyone-I'd heard about her pushing her ex in front of a car when he tried to take Jade from her arms in a crowded Sydney street but I've never seen her attack someone before. "Kitty has claws," I smirked.

"Oh shut up!" Ebony snapped, storming back into the cabin dragging Jade with her.

Rick stood up, Sophia clung to him like Jade always clung to Ebony. "I'd like to thank you for keeping Sophia safe for us and coming to look for us-are you coming back with us?" he asked me. "We could use someone like you-a level head, a soldier."

I paused. "Ebony?" I called out, "can you come back out?" I asked her. Ebony and Jade walked back out and waited for me to speak again. "We've got a choice to make, Rick has offered us a place in his group and until my wound heals I am in no shape to protect you."

Ebony's face lit up. "Really? PJ do you mean it?" She grabbed Jade's hand and squealed in delight. "PJ, I love you! You're a champ!" She hugged me, "thank you, thank you, thank you! I'll go get our things and load the jeep!" Ebony bounced back into the cabin to start packing what little stuff we had inside.

I shot a sideways look at Rick. "I'd take that as a yes, Officer Grimes."

Daryl stared at Rick. "We don't need three more bloody mouths to feed," he growled at Rick.

"We don't turn away people who need us," Rick warned Daryl.

I left the men to their argument and started helping Ebony to load the jeep. Ebony made fun of me mercilessly when I bought Jodie but my baby had earned her strips in the last seventy days. She wanted me to by the 1967 Chevy Impala that they had in the lot with the Jeep but I had to tell her that the impala wasn't a good off-road car and the parts were expensive to replace even on a soldier's salary.

"Can I help with anything?" Rick suddenly asked me.

I shook my head. "No thank you, Officer Grimes."

"Rick, call me Rick," he smiled, Sophia still clinging to him. He helped me shove a box in the back of the Jeep, "your name is Philomena?" he chuckled.

I shook my head. "It's Greek, it's the name of a worshipped virgin martyr, it mean's powerful love. My mother was a literature professor-well she was until she ate my dad." Seeing the look on his face I laughed, "I aint no virgin martyr, Rick. Trust me." I slammed the tail gate up and whistled to Ebony, she came out with some bags full of food and threw them in the back seat before lifting Jade up. "You ok rabbit?" I asked her, flicking her noise.

"I'm ok Aunty Jay," she smiled, putting her seatbelt on.

"Eb's, you'll have to sit on someone's lap," I informed her, getting in the driver's seat. Rick put Sophia in beside Jade before jumping in the front seat, leaving Daryl and Ebony standing outside the car.

"I would rather immolate myself," Ebony declared, glaring at Daryl.

"Just get in the Jeep," I grumbled. "You can immolate yourself when you get to the farm." And Ebony called me a drama queen, I thought, watching Daryl and Ebony stuff ass around in the back. Jade and Sophia exploded into a fit of giggles and I couldn't help but laugh myself seeing Ebony sitting on Daryl's lap looking like she was ready to kill me. I started the Jeep and made my way down the trail-I was doing the right thing-wasn't I?


	5. Chapter 5

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Five**

We had a collective audience when the six of us arrived back at the farm. Sophia's mother ran towards the Jeep, crying out for her daughter who happily returned her mother's tears. I got out of the jeep and stood back watching the scene unfold in front of me, Ebony scrambled off Daryl's lap as quick as she could and held Jade close to her despite the four-year-olds attempts to chase after her new friend.

Sophia's mother walked over to me whilst she held onto her daughter, I could see the tears on her face and I groaned inwardly, if it wasn't Ebony or Jade I had a predilection to steer away from crying women or children. "Are you PJ?" she asked me, sniffling, trying to clean her face.

I nodded. "Yeah-that's me." She suddenly hugged me, Ebony looked at me with a bemused smirk on her face as I patted her robotically on the shoulder. "Sophia's safe, that's all that matters, right?" I tried to comfort her. "What's your name?" I asked, trying to get her off me, my whole body was stiff like cardboard.

"Carol, Carol Peletier," she whispered, finally peeling off me. Carol was a tiny, mouse of a woman with silver, grey hair cropped incredibly short like my flaming red hair was cropped but Carol's hair wasn't spiked like mine was, she looked like Ebony had when I first convinced her to move in with me. There was a confident woman under there somewhere. Unfortunately unlike Ebony, Carol didn't look like she would do whatever she needed to do to protect her daughter.

Ebony started talking with Rick about somewhere to pitch our tent as I started sorting out the supplies in the boot. She sent Jade off to play with Sophia, it was good to see Ebony with a smile on her face as we pitched the tent-it basically felt like we were camping like we had last summer with some of my squad buddies and their families. We pitched our tent up with no trouble-actually Ebony and I had a routine down pat which meant that the tent was up in ten minutes including our bedrolls and our clothes were also in the tent. Needing a change of clothes as I was still in my bloodied jeans and shirt, I tossed all my clothes in a trash bag and slipped into a pair of black jeans and a red bikini top. I strapped my holster to my thigh and checked to make sure the gun was on safety before I climbed out of the tent and headed back to my Jeep to get the gear out for my bow, it needed to be restrung and my sight tested, given that there was a farm full of supposed protectors I could afford to take apart my bow for a couple of hours and clean it.

"Corporal Lucas?" Herschel called out to me as he approached me. "May we have a word?" he asked, eyes flickering over the scars I had as well as the many tattoos I was decorated with.

"We can have several, Mr Greene." I smiled. "Do you have a table or something? I need some time to pull my bow apart and a lot of room."

"Right this way," Herschel smiled. "And please, call me Herschel." Herschel took me over to a small bench setting that looked like it had jumped straight out of _Little House on the Prairie _and sat down with me after I put a sheet out on the table.

"What did you want to talk about?" I asked him.

"I'd appreciate it if you hand over your gun," Herschel blurted out. "I'm happy for you to keep your bow but I won't tolerate guns on my property."

I shrugged, judging by the look on his face my reaction wasn't one that he had expected. "Handgun-not exactly my best weapon. I'm good at long range combat, fairly tolerant with hand-to-hand combat, I was a sniper actually. If I still had my sniper rifle I would have had to argue with you but it was in the shop getting a new part so I don't have it." I unclipped the holster and sat it on the table, "I will ask for you to keep it safe though, it was my grandfather's last gift to me before he died. See the inscription?"

Herschel drew the gun and turned it. "_I have some strategical vision, I could calculate some few moves ahead and I have an intellect that is badly missed in the country which is run bygenerals and colonels-_Garry Kasparov?"

"Russian Grand Chess Master," I grinned, "a writer and a political activist considered to be the greatest chess player of all time."

"You play chess?" Herschel questioned.

"Oh here we go," Ebony rolled her eyes, sitting down beside me. "She love's chess, can sit for hours thinking of her next move. I played with her several times, one game we played took all day. I moved a pawn, went to take Jade to playgroup, did some errands, payed some bills and when I came back she had seriously just moved a pawn. We still haven't finished that game but we mark down where the pieces are when we bring it out occasionally."

I rolled my eyes at her as I worked on my bow. "All the greatest generals played chess, it's a thinker's game."

"I'd be much obliged if you could play a game with me at some point," Herschel smiled. He holstered my gun back up and stood up, leaving it on the table.

"Aren't you gonna take it?" I asked him.

He shook his head. "Who am I to take away a gift from your family?" Herschel questioned. "I only ask that you use it responsibly and avoid from causing unnecessary trouble, as a soldier I know you would have some aspect of discipline, PJ."

I smiled. "Thank you, sir. And thank you for letting us stay. I know it won't be for long, at least until I heal and Rick's son is better."

He nodded at me and walked away.

Ebony breathed a sigh of relief. "I can't believe he almost took your gun away, PJ." She patted my shoulder, "thanks for doing this. I know you don't trust anyone."

"I trust you," I told her, grabbing my gun back. "And you said you wanna be in a group so I trust you to make the right choice."

"So can I borrow that to shoot Lori?" Ebony asked me. When I laughed at her she punched me in the arm. "The woman is a nightmare, she already threw a bunch of domestic chores at me and started rattling off a list of stuff for you to do. I laughed at her, the day you go desperate housewife on me I told her, is the day that hell freezes over."

"Yeah Andrea warned me about her," I replied. "I believe she called her Lady Grimes, or First Lady of the Atlanta Survivors."

"The blonde?" Ebony asked me.

I nodded.

"I like her," she announced. Ebony continued chatting about the camp, telling me about everyone who was there-in like an hour she had made friends with everyone apart from Daryl and Lori. Daryl was still, I assumed, pissed about getting slapped, and Lori just looked like she'd swallowed a sour lemon. I smile, sitting there listening to Ebony talk, I could see several of her worries just floating off into the sky and all I could think of was how much I had been holding her back all just because I was trying to protect her from the big bad world.


	6. Chapter 6

**++++++ I do not own Supernatural or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Six**

The following morning when I emerged from our tent I found that the sun was high in the sky and a warm bite had already settled over the farm for the day. I looked down at my watch, it was almost midday, cursing myself for having slept so late I quickly prepared myself for the day. My plan was to head back to the jam on the highway and scavenge for supplies-maybe Daryl or Rick would come with me. Once I was dressed, I scribbled down my notes in a small pocket diary and did a supply check.

"Are you going out again?" Ebony questioned, sitting a basket full of washing down on the table beside me. She looked over at the map and at the location I had circled, "Rick said that that was where they got over taken by the herd."

"We need supplies," I told her. "Herd or no herd, Eb, we need supplies. Meds for the kids, meds for us. We need anything we can get our hands on."

Ebony sighed. "Can't you just rest up a bit?" she pleaded. "Babe, we're amongst friends."

"Amongst friends?" I asked, spying the basket of washing. "I'm assuming that's from Lori?"

She laughed. "Yeah, First Lady Grimes asked me if I could bring this over to you and wake you up. She thinks you've slept enough. Her and Rick had a full on argument about you in the RV."

I snorted. "Bitch." I folded the map up and put it, along with my note book in my pocket. "You see Daryl?" I asked her. "I'm gonna see if he'll come with me to do a run."

Ebony shook her head. "Nope. But I did hear Herschel complaining about Daryl taking a horse so he's probably gone out already. Maybe Rick will go with you," she smirked.

I raised an eyebrow. "Ok, Eb. I've seen that smirk a million times before, what is it this time?"

She shook her head. "Oh nothing. I just know you, PJ you have a thing for guys with accents. And Rick, my friend, has that perfect southern drawl that makes a girl wanna do all sorts of things."

I folded my arms and leant back against the table. "Ok-so that must mean since you have that Aussie accent that I totally wanna screw you, right?" I asked her. Ebony screwed her face up causing me to burst out laughing, "come here, babe, give us a kiss."

Ebony pushed away from me, the two of us laughing loud enough to draw attention from Lori and Shane who at that moment were talking in hushed tones on the deck of the farmhouse. She waved at Lori who turned away from them and stalked off. "I really don't think she likes us. Andrea was saying she doesn't like anyone, apparently her husband was barely even dead before she hooked up with Shane. But then Andrea told me that Shane told Lori that Rick was dead. Then when Rick came back it was all hush, hush." She picked up the washing basket, "I'll go hang this out, you be back before sundown, madam."

"Yes, sir," I saluted. Simultaneously we bumped fists and made little explosion movements with our hands before we split. Having a quick search, I eventually found Rick talking with the Asian kid and an African American whom I had yet to be introduced to. "Afternoon Rick," I smiled with a wave.

Rick turned his attention away from the boys. "Good to see you up and about," he smiled. "Corporal Lucas, you haven't met Glenn and T-Dog, yet."

"PJ," I corrected him. "Please call me PJ." I shook both the boy's hands in turn. Both boys seemed nice enough to me, they wanted to know how come I hadn't been killed like all of the other soldiers that they'd come across in the last couple of months, I didn't know how to tell them that me and a bunch of other soldiers in my unit, including my commanding officer, had deserted to be with our families. "I wanted to see if you would come on a supply run with me," I explained to Rick. "Whilst I was looking for signs of life on the highway I marked a whole bunch of cars that had clothes, food, weapons. No walkers but I've also got a few tricks up my sleeve. Wanna come?"

Rick paused. "I should really stay here."

I shrugged. "Suit yourself, Rick but I'm heading out. If I leave in the next ten minutes we'll make it back by dark."

"But you're still wounded," Rick pointed out, trying his hardest to make me stay. "You'll need a spotter and I don't think anyone is a good enough shot to go with you."

"All the more reason you should go, Rick," Glenn answered, backing me up. "With a cop and a soldier out there, what could go wrong?"

Rick sighed. "Let me run it by Lori," he asked me before stalking off.

I scoffed. "Let me run it by Lori," I mimicked. "Guy could grow some balls." Glenn and T-Dog looked at each other before leaving me alone to wait for my answer. It was at this time that Shane chose to make his presence known to me by grabbing my arm roughly and yanking me behind a car. "Let go of me!" I snapped, grabbing one of my throwing knives off my belt and slashing his arm with it.

Shane pushed me away from him and pointed his finger right at my face. "Get this straight, Corporal Lucas-I don't trust you."

I rolled my eyes at him. "You don't trust me? I have done nothing to earn this, Shane. Nothing. I kept Sophia safe when I could have let her die-if anything you should at least trust me for that. If anything I shouldn't trust any of you since your man shot me." I held the knife out in front of me, his eyes stayed on the weapon. "And like you can talk about trust-fucking Rick's wife after you lied to her about him being dead." I stared Shane down like one did a rabid dog and he stared at me like he was going to rip me limb from limb, "Rick and I are going out on a supply run, Shane, if, whilst I am gone, you lay a finger on Ebony or Jade I will cripple you and leave you on the highway to die." I slipped underneath Shane's arm and walked back into the open just as Rick came over to me, he was armed and ready which I assumed meant that he was coming on the raid with me. I cleaned the knife off on my jeans and held my arms up, waiting for an answer. "Yes? No?" I asked.

Rick nodded. "Yeah I'll come with you. Mainly cause Lori seems to think you'll report back to another group."

I snorted. "Yeah totally." I opened the Jeep door, "it's people like Shane and your wife that made me stay away from groups."

"Lori's a good person," Rick tried to convince me. "A very good person. She's just got things on her mind."

I nodded, pretending to agree with him. "Ok-so, I promised Ebony I'd be back by nightfall so let's do a general raid, stockpile anything we think will be of importance then come back tomorrow morning for what we left behind. Down the highway toward the city I found one of those huge Lories that does deliveries for Walmart, I'm thinking-well, hoping that there will be food there. It's just a case of getting it back to the Jeep since the closest we can get is a about six hundred metres close, even then we could get stuck."

Rick shook his head with a smile.

"What?" I frowned.

"I wish we had found you sooner," Rick replied, "some people could still be alive that aren't." I sighed, Rick, like me, had the weight of the world on his shoulders, birds of a feather we were, I just hoped that nothing would go wrong.


	7. Chapter 7

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Seven**

It was almost two in the afternoon according to my watch when Rick and I found the truck that we were looking for. The keys were obviously long gone but it didn't take my sheriff friend too long to find a pair of bolt cutters and take out the occasional walker that he came across.

Using the bolt cutters to break the lock on the back of the truck, I stood by, arrow ready to fire just in case there was anything in the back of the truck, but the first thing that I noticed when he pushed open the door was the smell of rotting meat and off milk. The odour was so pungent that I almost spilled my lunch but forced myself to swallow my vomit and breathe through my mouth.

"Do you think that any of this food will be any good?" Rick asked me.

I put the arrow back in my quiver and pulled myself up into the truck. "Well the cold storage is in the back of the truck so I ain't even game to touch any of that." I opened my switch blade and cut on of the cardboard boxes open, the big grin on my face on my face had Rick jumping into the truck to join me. "We have four boxes of Mountain American Jerky," I grinned, "Buffalo, elk, antelope, venison, beef and salmon. Ok these we definitely take." I marked the box whilst Rick moved on to the next boxes which revealed several different types of canned goods, a couple boxes of toothpaste and a couple boxes of those travel first aid kits that they sell in chemists. We spent the next couple of hours sorting through the truck and carrying boxes back to the jeep.

The original plan was to come back in the morning for the rest of the supplies but after a deep discussion, Rick decided against the plan so he set about searching for something that he could hotwire and drive back to the farm with more boxes loaded up in the car whilst I stayed look out. We managed to drain a couple of cars of the last remaining gas that they had in their tanks and I even found a couple of colouring in books for the kids and some new clothes that Ebony and I could sort through back at the farm. The worst thing was that my rabbit would grow and grow so clothes would be a problem for her where Ebony and I always shared even though she was somewhat dismisses of all the black I wore.

"We should come back in the morning for more," Rick suggested, "I think that we have enough for now."

I urged him to wait a moment and went back up to the cabin of the truck to search the glove box-if I was lucky, the driver would have left a packet of cigarettes in there…low and behold today must be my lucky day. There was a pack of Cambridge with only two missing. I grinned and pocketed the pack, just as I wriggled my way out of the cabin I spotted a walker weaving in and out of the cars. I shrugged, a walker is easy to take care of.

"PJ!" Rick called out in a low whispered before he grabbed me from behind.

"What?" I hissed, pushing him away at the same time I grabbed for my knife. "Dang it Rick! Are you mental?"

"Walkers!" he whispered back at me. "Herd!"

I didn't need to be told twice. "Get up top," I ordered, climbing up the side of the truck, Rick followed and the two of us lay flat down on roof of the Lorie silently, listening as the shuffling, moaning and groaning got louder and louder. "This is bullshit," I whispered. "Stuck on a roof-last time that happened I polished off half a bottle of peach schnapps and lost my virginity to Karl Jenkins. Except this time it's to avoid getting eaten and not getting caught by my dad."

Rick stared at me and shook his head. "You know those moments in life where people share too much information?" I nodded. "That was one of those moments, PJ."

The two of us grinned.

"Well, we're stuck here looks like," I sighed, pulling the pack of cigarettes out of my jeans. "It'll be nightfall soon and I ain't dumb enough to travel at night. Smoke?" I asked. Rick took the cigarette off me and I lit us both up, kind of ignoring the herd moving around below us. After ten minutes of just lying there and watching the sun slowly move in the sky I looked sideways at Rick. "Tell me Rick, alternative weapons?" I asked him, staring at the Colt Python that was holstered on his hip. "Or are you a gun man?"

He smiled at me, trying not to get the walker's attention. "Says you, Robin Hood." He stared up at the darkening sky. "I general have a knife on me as well, actually. Aren't you worried that a bow will get you injured?"

I shook my head. "No, not really. I've killed walkers with my bare hands, only cause I'm crazy enough to get up close to the mothers." Grinning, I turned to Rick, "if you hit someone hard enough, and at the right angle, you can send bits of bone straight into the brain and kill them."

"Really?" he asked me.

I nodded. "Yup. I can show you if you want?" I offered. "Also, it might be a good idea if you wall get some kind of grasp on hand-to-hand combat basics because in this world you have to worry about living people as well as the dead."

"You'd be willing to teach me after the way we treated you?" he asked me.

I shrugged. "Live and let live I always say. Tomorrow when we get back to the camp, you and me are gonna start with the basics. I'm gonna kick your ass, Grimes," I smirked. Putting my cigarette out and had a quick peak over the side of the truck. By the time Rick and I found our way back to the cars, it would be dark and neither of us, as it seemed, like travelling in the dark. "I think we're stuck here for the night," I announced. "Good thing I've got some pleasant company."

"Do you snore?" Rick asked me.

I snorted. "Do you?" I replied.

Just my luck, a find a guy who actually mucks around with me and he's married…if this wasn't the end of the world I'd be laughing so hard I'd cry.


	8. Chapter 8

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC ++++++**

**Eight**

When I woke up the following morning I found that sometime during the middle of the night Rick must have put his jacket over me to keep me warm. Sitting up, I noticed that Rick was still asleep and that the sun had only just risen so there was still a crisp chill to the air. I sat Rick's jacket beside him and sat up to stretch before loading my bow and standing. There was a couple off walker's mulling around the deserted cars. I fired my bow, four times in quick succession to take them out.

I smiled and climbed down to the ground for a stretch before I went to collect my arrows. Rick was up by the time I found my last one and he'd lit a cigarette to offer me. "Thanks, Rick."

"We heading back?" he asked me. "They'll probably send out a search party."

"Or not," I shrugged. "I don't think Shane likes me very much. They probably think that I've killed you and taken off." I laughed seeing the look on Rick's face.

"Don't blame Shane for just trying to look out for the interests of the group," Rick told me. "I'm sure you've done some pretty unusual things-actually I know-Ebony told me everything."

I rolled my eyes. "Of course she did."

"You don't trust people do you?" Rick asked me. "You know you can't get anywhere in the world without trusting people, PJ."

"I'm a marine-well, was a marine," I frowned, my whole life flashing before my eyes. "I come from six generations of marines-by father, brothers, uncle, cousins-all marines. We trusted inside the family-not anything outside our own element. I trust Eb's cause we lived together for five years. It's gonna take a little more than some nice small talk and giving me your jacket in the middle of the night."

Rick looked at me with a frown but he did a pretty good job of keeping what he wanted to say to himself.

I picked up the last two bags we had and tossed it to Rick, keeping my own, then the two of us headed back towards the cars. We ran into another couple of walkers and Rick let me take them out, my way was better-no muss, no fuss, just complete silence. There was nothing around my Jeep or the new truck that Rick had adopted so the two of us spent the next hour navigating our way out of the mess on the highway.

Eventually we made our way back to the farm just in time to see Shane, Glenn and T-Dog loading up an old pale yellow Jeep Cherokee to probably come and look for us. I pulled in behind Rick and got out of my Jeep just in time to hear Jade call out my name. My rabbit came running up to me, clutching her doll, followed by Sophia. "Hey squirts," I grinned, slipping some candy out of my pockets and giving it to them. "Go play," I told them, messing up their hair.

"What the hell happened?" Shane demanded to know.

"Herd came through," Rick answered his friend. "PJ and I got stuck on the roof of a truck but we've got supplies-lots of supplies."

"What did you get?" Shane asked. The pissed off look on his face was replaced by one of happiness. "Where did you find it all?"

"Delivery truck," Rick answered. "We got dried meats, a couple of different cases of tined food, some hygiene products-first aid kits. PJ and I are looking at heading out soon and seeing what else we can find."

Shane stared at me. I could see the cut on his arm which made me wonder exactly what lie he had told the rest of the group about it. "Rick-" he started.

"I'm gonna need some help sorting this out," Rick cut him off. "PJ would you go and see if Herschel needs anything? We have enough to share."

"Sure," I smirked, seeing the look on Shanes face when Rick said share. I grabbed my bow and made my way towards the farm house. I raised my hand knocked on the door. Moments later a young blonde came to the door. "Hi-I'm PJ," I smiled, "I was wondering if I could speak to Mr Greene?" I asked, putting on my polite face.

"You must be Corporal Lucas," she smiled, opening the door. "I'm Beth. DAD!" She shouted at the top of her lungs.

The two of us waited for Herschel to come to the front door, when he saw me, he frowned. "What can I do for you, Corporal Lucas?" he asked me.

"Rick and I went on a supply raid," I told him, "we got a couple car loads of stuff-I was wondering if you want anything? Now I'm not offering you the supplies as a bribery to let us stay-I'm just helping another human being. And please, it's PJ."

Herschel hesitated. "Ok. As long as we're offering-how about a game of chess?"

"Sure," I smiled. "Just let me sort this out and then I'll kick your arse."

"Whilst I have you here, PJ," Herschel added, "we'll be having a memorial ceremony for one of our own fallen. Will you come?"

I shrugged. "See what happens. I'm not really one for crashing funerals of people I barely know." I turned and headed back to the cars. By this time Rick and Glenn had just taken everything outside of the truck whereas Shane was heading towards my Jeep. "Touch the Jeep and I will kill you," I warned Shane, hand hovering over a knife in my belt.

"She will," Andrea warned her, coming up behind me. "PJ seems to be just that type of woman." She looked at me, there was a small smile on her face but it vanished. "Need any help?" she asked me.

"Sure," I answered. From behind me I heard the familiar light footsteps of Ebony as she walked over to me. "Sorry I didn't come-" I stopped when Ebony slapped me right across the face. "Mother f-what the hell?" I gasped, rubbing my face.

"You didn't come home last night," Ebony snapped.

I laughed and Ebony stormed off back towards our tent. "So Andrea…" I smirked, digging into the side of the Jeep, "drink?"

Andrea looked at the bottle of whisky in my hand and a grin formed on her face. "Welcome to the group."


	9. Chapter 9

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Nine**

Andrea and I had been doing shots all the way through the memorial ceremony for that farm hand Otis. According to Andrea, the man had been the one that had shot Carl-something I knew nothing about-and he had 'sacrificed' his life to bring the medicine to Carl to save him.

That sounded fifty different types of suspicious if you asked me.

And no one was.

I actually liked Andrea. Once upon a time she used to be a civil rights lawyer before the world ended. She told me that she and her sister Amy-who was twelve years younger than herself. Apparently they were on a road trip, heading back to Amy's collage when they were stranded in Atlanta and rescued by Dale.

I could have opened up about my family but I had no idea where anyone was. Mum and dad were one a cruise somewhere when wildfire was declared, three out of six brothers were in Iran, one was in England on loan to MI6 and the other two had been stationed at Fort Benning. That was all I knew of my family apart from Ebony and Jade.

Andrea was very forthcoming with a lot of information about this group-that's the thing. If you're smart enough to ply certain people with alcohol, they will tell you anything that you need to know about anyone. I'd done it with Ebony once about two years ago-girl was very forthcoming with a tone of information she would never have told me.

After the memorial ceremony, I found Rick talking with Herschel. The two men were talking in hushed but angry tones about Daryl taking a horse without being asked and Rick keeping his people out of the house. There was a long list of things that Herschel didn't like about the group but the three of us-weren't on it.

I leant against an abandoned piece of farm machinery and cleared my throat. Both men turned to stare at me. I grinned, "sorry to interrupt but I'd like to start on those lessons now if I were you."

"Lessons?" Hershel asked the two of us.

"Hand-to-hand combat," I explained to Herschel. "I could teach you, if you want."

Herschel laughed. "PJ-I am far too old for that."

"Suit yourself," I shrugged. "Come on Rick."

Rick chuckled and followed me to a section of land near the small tent city. "So what exactly are you planning on doing?" he asked me. "Because I still can't see how this will help me against the walkers."

"Oh it won't," I laughed. "Think of it more as last minute insurance. Works great against people. I assume you know how to disarm a person?"

"I was a cop," Rick replied, a slight smirk on his face.

I removed all of my weapons and sat them on the hood of the Jeep. "Weapons, Rick," I ordered. "The less sharp pointy things we have on us the better. I don't fancy adding more scars to the ones I already have."

Rick removed his weapons and his jacket and sat them down with all my gear. "You know I've had my fair share of female suspects and I've handled them all very well."

"Well aren't you cocky?" I asked him. "Ok, give me your best shot. Or would you prefer I insult you a little bit to make it feel like you're gonna arrest me?"

He shook his head. "No, thank you." Rick came at me, I could see the hesitancy in his actions so I tangled my leg up behind his and flipped his legs out from right underneath him. Rick landed on the ground with a thud. He groaned in pain and stared up at me. "Ok-I hesitated."

I smirked. "Hesitate and you're dead." I offered Rick my hand and helped him to his feet. "Ok let's try this again."

This time Rick came at me and I ducked before using the significantly smaller weight of my body to throw him off balance. He landed on the ground a second time and by this time we had an audience. Lori stood there with a sour look on her face but her eyes were stuck on Shane. Rick grabbed my leg and pulled me down on the ground.

"Getting distracted?" he asked me.

I lashed out, elbowing Rick in the ribs and pressed my arm against his throat. "I'm gonna go ahead here and quote Lord of the Rings," I whispered in his ear. "You have no power here…" I smirked before jumping to my feet.

Rick got to his feet. "I don't feel comfortable hitting at a girl," he informed me.

"They're just breasts, Rick," I snorted. "Did you know that the ancient Brit's used to fight completely in the nude and covered in blue pain? Cause I can strip and run around in blue paint."

"I don't need that image," Rick laughed.

"You sure?" I smirked. I winked at him. The two of us seemed to be engaging in a battle of witty banter with the occasional punch thrown in. Rick grabbed my arm and twisted a little but I grabbed him, he kicked the side of my knee and sent the two of us tumbling to the ground. I kneed Rick in the side of the head and straddled his chest whilst he was dazed enough.

Rick stared up at me from in between my thighs. "Can you get off me?" he murmured.

I laughed at him. "Sure thing…officer," I smirked seconds before a gunshot rang out across the farm. "What the-?" I gasped, jumping to my feet. I grabbed my gun and flipped off the safety. Following Rick I ran close behind him, stopping when we found Daryl bleeding out on the ground from a gunshot wound to the head.

I stood back whilst Rick checked Daryl for any more wounds, Ebony came running over with Shane and Dale, one of the first aid kits in her hands. I could see Andrea standing on top of the RV with a rifle in her hands. Great, I thought, who let the drunk have a gun?


	10. Chapter 10

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Ten**

Turns out Daryl's head wound was only a flesh wound according to Ebony. The serious concern however was the apparent crossbow bolt wound on his chest. Ebony started sprouting off a bunch of technical medical terms before disappearing to go take care of Daryl.

I offered to take guard duty whilst everyone rushed about organising some kind of big dinner that Lori and Carol were working on. There was no way in hell I was gonna sit through some happy go lucky family dinner whilst the dead roamed freely in the woods. Ebony couldn't have been more thrilled with the idea of everyone coming together and getting to know a little more about each other-girls had a thing for families whereas I wanted to be as far away from them as possible.

The smell of the roast wafted out over the farm as Lori and Carol worked their magic on the meat I had been told was deer. I stared out over the farm through my binoculars, I couldn't see any kind of movement which got harder as the sun went down. It was nights like this that made me feel like I was back overseas with my unit. God it was just my luck that I'd been on two months leave when the world ended.

I liked the feel of the fresh autumn air, it was a mix of summer air with a slight winter chill…winter...I thought…God how are we going to survive winter? Every year for almost five years Jade's had a good dose of the flu that required round the clock antibiotics. I had no reason to suspect that this year would be any different. All the small towns would have been picked clean-I guess that there was no way in hell that I could persuade Rick to come into the city with me and look for the hard stuff.

I must have been there for a couple of hours because the next thing I realised, Rick was climbing up the side of the RV to bring me a plate full of food. "Not really that hungry Rick," I told him.

Rick sat down beside me and held the plate of food out to me. "Just eat the damn food, PJ. Least you could do after Lori and Carol went to all that trouble."

I rolled my eyes and took the plate. "Last thing I wanna do is offend your sour lemon wife. I swear the facial expressions she wears reminds me of Petunia Dursley from Harry Potter."

Rick sighed. "I understand you don't like Lori-"

"Really?" I asked him. "Whatever gives you that idea Rick?" I sat the plate of food on the box beside me, "I just have a thing about women who sleep with other men." The look on Rick's face told me that he already knew. I raised an eyebrow. "You already knew?" I laughed. "Wow-you already knew."

"What do you want me to say?" Rick asked me.

I shook my head. "You don't need to explain things to me. Andrea told me everything-Lori thought you were dead, I get that. But it's not Lori I'm worried about-it's Shane."

Rick sighed. "Andrea knows…? Of course she does…" He frowned. "You have good instincts, PJ. Very good instincts. Shane's worried me ever since he got back from getting those medical supplies. He argues with me at every turn-you know he was questioning me about searching for Sophia only three days after we lost her."

"Did you know that they say there is a fine line between a criminal and a law enforcement officer?" I asked him. Throwing out one of the many random facts I had picked up watching the discovery channel or national geographic. "The only difference between a cop and a criminal is the police force has better dental."

"I love my wife," Rick whispered. "I love my wife…I love my wife," he repeated, like he was trying to tell himself more than he was trying to tell me. "You can't say anything."

"What would I say?" I laughed. "I'm the outsider. I'm thinking of getting a shirt that says so. Isn't there a band called the Outsider?"

"You're new here, PJ," Rick pointed out. "I can see you being a very valued member of this group. You've already pulled your weight more than anyone besides Dale and Daryl."

"Just doing what comes naturally," I shrugged. Yeah and making up for the fact that I deserted when peopled needed me the most. "I've got a lot to make up for. I thought that if I kept Ebony and Jade safe that would make up for it but I don't know anymore."

"Make up for what?" Rick frowned. He folded his hands in his lap, "as long as we're sharing you might as well tell me what you're hiding."

Suck it up sunshine.

"Ok," I sighed. "I was on vacation when everything went down. I was babysitting Jade whilst Ebony was on a date when I got the order that rescinded my holiday privileges and I was told to report to the nearest military base which was Fort Hamilton. So I left Jade with a neighbour and reported for duty just as I was instructed."

Rick was doing a good job at listening.

"We were deployed about three hours after we reported for duty. It was a huge joke between all of us that the dead were rising, I mean really? This shit only happens in horror movies," I laughed. "But we went in but by that time the hospitals were a mess-the dead were feeding on the living and we were shooting civilians on mass…on our unit commanders orders…I shot a woman-at least I'm pretty sure I shot a woman holding her kid and all I could think of was Jade-sometimes it's all I can think about. Ebony pointed out that I whimper in my sleep-that's why. I completely froze after that. So did everyone in the unit." My hands were shaking slightly. "That's when our commanding officer ordered us all to go home-to our families-don't worry about this-we should be with our families."

"So you deserted?" Rick asked.

I nodded. "So I deserted. By the time I got home, a couple of walkers had broken into our apartment and had my girls trapped in my bedroom."

"You did the right thing," Rick assured me. "PJ, you did the right thing. There was nothing bad about what you did. You were protecting your family, just like I'd protect mine." He rubbed my shoulder like he was trying to reassure me that what I had done was the right thing. Even in the darkness of night I could see every line on his face, ever curve, every freckle, every whisker. My hand twitched and I rubbed his face with a smile.

Don't do it PJ, the sensible Philomena Jocelyn Lucas yelled at me. Don't do it.

I leant in and kissed him lightly on the lips.

Rick's whole body seized up for a split second before he grabbed the back of my head to kiss me back.

I think we could have stayed like this-God it was divine-but we jumped apart as we both heard someone calling out for Rick. He stared at me with those cloudy grey-blue eyes and practically jumped down from the RV.

If this were a cartoon I'm sure he would have left a cloud behind.

I rubbed my lips, trying to get the taste of him off my mouth.

What the hell had I just done?


	11. Chapter 11

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Eleven**

Instead of choosing to face my problems I chose to run from it.

I managed to shrug off guard duty back to Dale by bribing him with a packet of candy. Whilst everyone helped clean up from dinner, I loaded up the Jeep with some gas. My intentions were to head into the nearby town and start looking for any rogue supplies that scavengers had missed. A couple hours after everyone had gone to bed, I left a note for Ebony, pinned to the side of the tent, telling her not to worry about me. I then I headed off into town with just me, Johnny Cash and half a bottle of whisky to keep me company. The trip into town was incredibly uneventful aside from me cruising in the middle of the road singing at the top of my lungs-apart from the shower back home, no one had ever heard me singing before. The trip into town also gave me some things to think about.

Like how could I have kissed Rick?

He's a married man with a kid-I wasn't about to suggest chasing after him just because Lori cheated on him. Two wrongs never make a right despite what my math teacher always told me. It's those godforsaken gorgeous eyes-I have never seen eyes so…so…expressive before. I can see this becoming a serious problem if I stayed. Ebony would never leave mainly because there was finally some stability for her and Jade. She would never forgive me if I ever left but if I was gone then what I didn't know wouldn't hurt me. Ebony was so at home with these people-more so than she had ever been with me. All we did was argue from the minute we left New York and started travelling south. She was a people person and I'm just the weird ass roomie that everyone tolerated.

Hell, maybe it would be better just being me, the open road and Johnny. I wouldn't have to worry about anyone but myself.

What I had done was stupid-one of the stupidest things I've ever done. I had seen something that obviously wasn't there. The joking around, the jacket, the training, the talking…yeah-I had definitely seen something that wasn't there. I've been at their camp like four days and I'm already screwing things up.

Ebony was going to kill me when she found out.

I found what was left of an obviously looted convenience store and searched high and low. I found only a coupled packets of chips, some Band-Aids and some very old cans of spam-these days you can't be too picky about what you eat.

I jumped the counter and started looking through the drawers. I ignored the money-now it was just paper to burn-and kept searching until I found a zip-lock baggie full of green dry leafy material with a rolled up joint in the bag. "Well, well, well," I smirked, finding a lighter.

I lit up and tossed the stuff in my bag. Heading next door to some dingy little hair salon I continued my search. There wasn't much there except various chemicals used to dye your hair-Ebony would find some kind of use for some of the base chemicals but I wasn't sure what to make of the rest.

This is stupid, I mumbled to myself, you're only running around in the middle of the night on your own because you kissed a married man. You're being childish, I growled, taking a puff. Considering the minimal amount of food I've had in the past few days I know I was going to be so many different types of messed when I came down from this incredibly enjoyable high.

It also reminded me of the days before boot camp when I would hang out with the dead beats in our street. Man those were some good days.

I opened the door behind the front counter. There was a walker standing directly behind the door and it basically fell on top of me, grabbing, clawing, trying to bite at me. I fumbled around, trying to grab my weapon without being bitten. Eventually I reach back and grabbed a broken arrow that I stabbed straight through the walker's ear. The walker fell limp against me, I shoved the body aside and got to my feet.

"Son of a bitch," I mumbled. I pulled my small torch out of my pocket and turned it on so that I could find my bow which I had dropped. The first thing I spotted where several walker's focused on my position. I swore and retreated into the back room, slamming the door shut behind me and locking it for good measure.

How could I have been so stupid?

"Well isn't this wizard?" I growled. Slumping down against the door, I flicked the torch light around the room. This was a store room of some kind. On the floor I could see dry blood mixed in with dry vomit-someone had drunk a hydrogen peroxide martini. "Stupid fool," I mumbled, "killing yourself ain't gonna help-we're all infected…I wonder if Rick knows?" I asked myself. That group would fall apart if they knew-I was sure of it.

Outside the door I could hear the walker's thumping up against the door. I didn't know how long the door was going to last and I need any idea I could think of-I had three throwing knives, my bowie-and my gun was back in our tent as I had been mid-way through stripping it for cleaning. Besides, I don't think I'm in any frame of mind to be fighting walkers on mass considering my current smoking habits.

I got to my feet and went over to the window-there was nothing outside and it was small enough for me to get through. But I wasn't going anywhere without my bow. If I waited a couple of hours I'd have the drugs out of my system-enough to be able to hold my own with just a knife.

The question was though-what would I do with my time?


	12. Chapter 12

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twelve**

I got back to the farm the following day just as they were finishing up with lunch.

I pulled the Jeep up just behind the RV and went straight to the back of my baby to get the couple of bags I'd managed to rustle up, thoroughly picking through what was left in the town and a number of houses by the time the sun had come. It was safe to say that there was nothing left in the town any more apart from corpses.

I grabbed the bags and headed towards my tent only to be stopped by Ebony who was trying her dandiest to copy my mother's best bitchface."Morning Ebony," I smiled.

"Where the bloody hell have you been?" Ebony snapped. She sat an empty basket on the ground and folded her arms. "And why the hell do you look like a bloody peacock, PJ?" she asked me.

I ran my hand through my newly dyed bright pink hair. "Peacock's are like a blue-green colour, Eb's."

She rolled her eyes at me. "Why the hell do you look like an advertisement for Mardi Gras?"

"Was unarmed and stuck in a room full of dye products-what was I supposed to do whilst I waited?" I asked her. "Plus I like it-hot pink cause I'm such a hottie. It'll wash-out in twenty washes according to the bottle and when it does I have a whole new range of colours-blue, green, purple, orange."

"Did you find anything?" Ebony asked me, shaking her head at my pink hair.

"Couple cans of spam, some medical supplies-low grade," I listed. "Some stuff from a hair salon-"

"Are you stoned?" Ebony suddenly asked. She leant in to get a closer look at my eyes. "Oh my god you're stoned!" She shook her head again. "What the hell did you do? Where did you get drugs?"

"Counter of the convenience store," I smirked. "It really was a convenience."

"Why?" Ebony asked me. She grabbed the basket, "talk to me whilst I get the washing off the line."

I sighed and followed her. "Listen, Eb's. I don't think it's good if I stick around anymore."

"No!" Ebony snapped. "I'm not leaving! Jade's safe-we're safe."

"I meant just me," I frowned. "Eb-I kissed Rick last night."

Ebony gasped. "You what?" she asked me. "You kissed Rick?! PJ! What the hell?"

I put my hand over her mouth. "Ebony-just focus, please. I can't stay here anymore. If you wanna stay then that's fine but I can't."

Ebony shook her head and pushed my hand away. "You don't understand," she sighed. "You ran off last night so you weren't here for breakfast." She started pulling stuff off the clothes line. "First thing-Lori's pregnant."

I frowned. "Lori's what?" I asked her.

"P-r-e-g-n-a-n-t," Ebony spelt it out to me. "I overheard Lori and Dale talking about it. Apparently Glenn spilled the beans to Dale and he confronted Lori." She dropped the clothes in the basket, "and there are walkers in the barn."

"That barn?" I asked her, pointing towards the barn near the house. "That barn?" I asked again. "There are walkers in that barn whilst there are children running around this farm? There are walkers in this barn whilst Jade, Sophia and Carl are running around playing? Is Herschel keeping them as pets?"

"Herschel believes that they're just sick and can be saved," Ebony answered. "

I shook my head and stormed off towards the Jeep where I had a Winchester 70 hidden in a locked box underneath the back seat. Ebony was yelling at me but I didn't hear anything. I sat my bow in the front seat and grabbed the rifle before heading towards the barn. I slung the rifle over the back of my shoulder and climbed up the back of the barn in search of the hay loft entrance.

When I found it, I could smell the stench of rotting flesh and hear the strangled moans as soon as I hit the wooden slats. I stuck my head over the side of the loft to see a number of walkers in the barn, some with fresh blood around their mouths and on their hands.

Someone had been feeding them.

Question is-feeding them what?

Ebony screamed at me from outside the barn.

I stuck my head out the window. "What?" I yelled.

"Get down here!" she yelled. "Don't go doing anything rash! We have to discuss this as a group."

I rolled my eyes. "You're fucking kidding me?" I snapped. I climbed down the way I had come up and got inches away from Ebony's face. "Discuss this as a group? You've integrated into this little group-which is fine by me-but I haven't. I don't discuss this as a group. I discuss this with me."

"Don't get angry with me because you screwed up PJ!" Ebony shouted back. "You were the one that kissed a married man with a pregnant wife."

I sighed. "Eb's-babe. I'm sorry, but I can't stay anymore. I just can't. I'm a lone wolf."

"That's bullshit," Ebony growled. "Hell-Herschel makes more sense when he catches walker's and sticks them in the barn over you. So you're saying that you want to leave because you're a lone wolf? You grew up in one of the biggest families I've ever seen. You're family Christmas dinners alone were a huge affair. Fifty Lucas family members running around your great uncle's farm for three days of fun. That's why we came this way-to see if the insane bastard was still alive and kicking because if anyone would be-it would be retired Colonel Joshua Lucas."

"I'm going to catch a few hours shut eye," I told her, trying to change the subject.

Ebony grabbed my arm. "If you don't wanna stay because it's something to do with Rick then I can accept that but if you walk out on Jade that's a different thing. I will never forgive you PJ. Never." She pushed past me roughly and headed off towards Carol and Beth who were folding clothes.

I sighed. Heading back to the Jeep I put the rifle back in the box and punched the seat in anger.

"Are you alright?" Lori asked me.

I jumped and turned around. "What do you care?" I growled.

"I was just asking a question," she frowned. Lori cleared her throat, "I wanted to thank you for helping us out-taking Rick and going looking for the supplies."

"Don't thank me," I urged her. Fake graces from women like her bugged the crap out of me. "Please, don't."

"I want you to stop spending so much time with Rick," she added.

"Why?" I asked her. "Worried something's gonna happen?" Shaking my head I laughed. "I'm not the kind of woman who likes to cheat. Sure I've screwed up but at least I'm not the one that's pregnant with a baby that's either Rick's-or Shanes." I grabbed my bow and walked away from her. "Don't assume you can tell me what to do because you can't. I'm going to grab some shut eye," I yawned, disappearing into the tent, hoping for a couple of hours at least.


	13. Chapter 13

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirteen**

I was having an insanely fantastic dream when I was woken up by two screaming children. Rubbing my eyes I sat up to see Sophia and Jade shaking me and screaming for me to get up, that something was wrong.

Grabbing my sidearm, I headed outside with the girls, my first stop was the Jeep where I loaded my rifle. When I saw the group armed and all assembled around near the barn and Shane was heading towards Rick and Herschel. The two men had two walkers chained like pets-stupid I know-but the way Shane was holding himself-something bad was gonna happen.

"Sophia, Jade, get Carl and you run into the house," I ordered them. I knelt down in front of the girls. "You find somewhere to hide-the attic-somewhere high and you come out for nothing except me. Jade?"

"Three knocks, Aunty Jay," she answered me.

I patted her head and they took off running towards the house.

A gun shot rang out across the farm and eight years of instinct and training kicked in. I bolted across the field towards the men and got there just as Shane shot at the walker a second time. He shot the walker in the head, killing it. Shane was preaching some shit about a living breathing human not being able to walk away from being shot.

A living breathing human wouldn't be able to walk away from his knee being injured either. I struck Shane in the side of the right knee and kicked the back of left sending him to the ground. Kicking his sidearm away, I held the Winchester up against his head and stared down the barrel. "What the hell do you think you're doing, Walsh?" I asked him.

"You best not be pointing that Robin Hood shit at me," Shane growled.

"I'm not," I sneered. "It's a rifle, a Winchester Model 70 actually. You're a cop, you should know these things."

Shane lashed out but I managed to jump away in time. "You're dead!" he warned me, not caring of his surroundings any more.

I reserved a special place in hell for people who try and add witty remarks into combat. This is a fight, not a national debate. Yes I had done it with Rick yesterday but we were mucking around. I raised an eyebrow at him and waited for his supposed life ending move.

"PJ what are you doing?" Rick asked me.

"I was just as pissed when I found out there were walkers in the barn," I answered, not taking my eyes off Shane. "But this is Herschel's place and it's up to him. I'm not saying I agree but we're guests on this farm. Shane, take you're king of the hill attitude somewhere else. Or are you just trying to prove yourself a better leader to get back forbidden fruits?"

Shane lunged at me-I admit that I did indeed provoke him with that last forbidden fruits comment but I was in a bit of a mood. I knocked Shane in the chin with the butt of the rifle and swung it around to point it at him once more.

"PJ! Shane! Stop it!" Rick yelled at the two of us.

Neither Shane nor I wanted to listen.

"You're gonna regret that," Shane warned me.

I held my ground.

"You were out there for two months on your own!" Shane argued with me. "Zero tolerance for walkers! You of all people should know that. You've been here for three days and you wanted nothing to do with the group, suddenly you're stepping up and being part of the group." He shook his head, "if you want to be a part of this group than maybe you should think about what those walkers will do when they get loose and rip apart the people you care about! It will be your fault if Ebony and Jade die! You can help us!"

I punched Shane in the face and he just went for me. There was no fluidity to his movement, just wild punches, like he wasn't even thinking about what he was doing. The look in his eyes was that of a wild man-he wanted to hurt me.

I was down with that.

I dropped my weapons and struck Shane in the back where his left kidney was. Shane groaned and stumbled forwards. He punched me in the ribs, knocking the wind out of me, I felt my stitches pull and gritted in pain. I grabbed his arm and elbowed him in the face before kicking the back of his knee. Shane fell to the ground, I whipped out a knife in my boot and held it up against his throat.

"See now we know what kind of man you really are," I whispered in his ear. I looked up at Herschel, "you're misguided, keeping walkers in the barn, thinking that it will keep you safe. It won't. I have half a mind to give Shane my gun and let him take them all out. I'm a soldier, that's in my nature to kill. It's in your nature to heal and you think you can heal them. But you can't." I stepped back, giving Shane the opportunity to get to his feet. "Herschel, take a look at what you are doing…those walkers in the barn have got to go. You want them to get out? Because if they do it's not a simple bite. Beth, Maggie, Patricia-they will be ripped apart. Ebony and my rabbit are here and if anything happens to them, I will break your legs and feed you to the walkers like you've been feeding them chickens."

Shane stood up. "Rick-you can't be trying to save them just because Herschel says so. Look at what happened to Amy, to Jim…walkers killed them, they could have killed Sophia. They're not ill-they're dead."

"They're infected," I whispered. I shook my head, "think of it as a swarm of ants, devouring everything in its path. Herschel, the way this group is going-it's not going to be long before the fuse is lit and there will be no way to stop it. Kill the walkers now whilst we have the ammo."

"My wife and my son are in that barn," Herschel objected.

"They're dead," Shane reminded him. "When they came back they probably tried to take a chunk out of you or the girls. It's time to end that." Shane spun around and walked off towards the group, picking up his gun on the way through.

I stared at Rick and Shane. "Shane's going to rile everyone up, but he's right. The walkers are a threat." I grabbed my weapons and followed Shane, Rick yelled at Herschel to take his walker, possibly to try and stop Shane. The group looked on, not knowing what to do. Ebony and Carol were searching for Jade and Sophia, I pointed to the house and they mouthed their thanks at me.

Shane had a look in his eyes that I'd seen any times before, and that was the look of a man who was about to do something really dumb. "Enough risking our lives living next to a bran of things that are trying to kill us!" he yelled, rallying everyone up. "Enough! Rick it ain't like it was before!"

Rick glared at Shane.

"Now if you want to live, if you want to survive, you have to fight for it!" he shouted at the collective. "I'm talking about fighting! Right here! Right Now!"

"Herschel! Herschel, take the stick!" Rick yelled as Shane ran to the barn. Shane found an axe leaning up against the barn wall and started striking at the lock. "Listen to me man please! Take it now!"

Herschel was frozen in place, he had been the whole time.

"Shane that's enough!" I yelled at him. Not know what to do. All I could do was aim at him and hope to god I didn't have to fire. Ebony had never seen me kill a human being before and I hoped that she would never have to.

Everyone was shouting as Shane struck at the lock. Over and over again he hit until everything started to give way.

Eventually the lock gave way.

Shane through the wooden slat aside and hit the top of the door a couple of times before walking away from the door. He pulled his gun out and aimed it at the door.

I turned the riffle away from the back of Shane's head and trained it on the door. "Ebony, Carol! Go to the house with the kids! Take Lori!" I roared at her. Behind me I heard them take off towards the house.

All the rest of us did was wait for the first walker to emerge from the barn.

I glanced at Shane as I advanced forward, Andrea, Daryl and T-Dog joined me.

Then all hell broke loose.

Honestly, it felt like I was back in Afghanistan with my unit, fighting our way through some of the more dangerous desert regions.

We continued firing until there wasn't a walker standing, all you could hear…was silence.

Awkward, uncomfortable silence.


	14. Chapter 14

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Fourteen**

Crying.

That was the first thing that I could hear.

Crying.

I didn't know who it was but they were crying something fierce.

My eyes searched through the pile of bodies on the ground in front of me. All of these people used to be somebody but now they were dead nobodies. I strung my rifle over my shoulder and turned away from the scene of carnage to head back up to the house where the three mothers were taking shelter.

It was Beth that was crying.

The closer I got to the house the less I could hear the crying until it was replaced by another set of tears-child's tears. I slammed open the door and knocked three times on the wall-just like I told her I would. Jade came running out of her mother's arms and slammed into me. The poor rabbit was sobbing uncontrollably, she hated the sound of gun fire.

Sophia was clinging to her mother and Lori had a good grip on Carl.

"Is it over?" Carol asked me.

I picked Jade up and nodded. "There was fifteen walkers in total-I didn't stick around to view the mess. Had to see if you were ok."

Jade wrapped her little arms around my neck and sobbed into my shoulder. Ebony sighed and rubbed Jade's shoulder. "What do you think will happen to us now? Do you think Herschel will want us gone?"

I hesitated. "Maybe-we did break his rules."

"They broke his rules," Ebony objected.

"Doubt Herschel will see it any differently, babe," I warned her. We heard footsteps coming into the house so we all headed outside-after all, this wasn't our house. I handed Jade back to Ebony even though she was unwilling to let me go.

You could cut the tension in this place with a bitter knife.

"I want you off my land!" was all I could make out as everyone shouted.

Shane moved towards Herschel until suddenly Maggie slapped him. "Don't touch him!" she shouted. "Haven't you done enough?" Maggie asked him.

They came up into the house, leaving the Atlanta survivors standing on the ground beneath the steps. "I mean it," Herschel growled, turning to face them, "off my land."

I pulled Ebony out of the door way and kept my girls close when Herschel swept passed us. The old man met my gaze and stopped in front of me. "PJ-a word," he ordered more than asked.

"Yes sir," I answered. Ebony shrugged at me and I shrugged back having no clue what he wanted from me. I headed inside after Herschel with Glenn close behind me.

"Take a seat," Herschel frowned, pointing at the table.

I sat the rifle down against the wall and sat down in front of Herschel feeling like I was at the principal's office. "What did you want to speak with me about?" I asked him.

"You're a hunter, a tracker-a damn fine one according to Ebony," Herschel spoke. "Now that Otis is gone, it's not going to be easy to feed us on what we have. I'd like for you and Ebony and Jade to stay on with us."

I laughed. It probably wasn't the best thing to do but I couldn't help it. "You want us to stay?" I asked him. "What about that big speech you had about moving on?"

"I can recognise when I need someone," Herschel assured me. "And you've done nothing bit helped since you got here. Even though you look like a flamingo. You shared you're supplies with us when you didn't have to. We've got enough room for the three of you. With Ebony being an RN, maybe it's better here than out there. I'd like you to think it over."

I didn't need to think it over.

"We'll stay," I told Herschel. "If not for me and Eb's but for Jade. My rabbit needs some stability."

"Will you come to the funeral?" was the next question off his lips.

I sighed. "Listen-Herschel. I've been to enough funerals in my life time. I mean no disrespect sir, but me and death have been together so long one might think we've got something going on."

Herschel sighed. "Suit yourself, PJ. But I would appreciate if you came."

Emotional blackmail.

I like it.

I nodded. "Ok, I'll come."

"I admire what you did for me back there," he continued, talking about the confrontation with Shane. "You showed a lot of respect."

I laughed at that. "I try and have a general respect for my elders, sir. Otherwise my pa would probably materialize out of nowhere and smack me on the back of the head."

Herschel smiled at me. "You can start moving your stuff into the house as soon as you want. And thank you for agreeing to come to the funeral, PJ."

I felt like that was Herschel dismissing me. Standing up, I smile my thanks and hurried back outside, grabbing my rifle as I went.

"What did Herschel want?" Ebony asked me, ambushing me as soon as I came out of the house.

"He asked us to stay," I told her. Seeing Ebony's face I said it again. "Herschel asked us to stay. Said my tracking and hunting skills would come in handy. He wants us to stay."

"And you said?" Ebony frowned.

"I said yes," I smiled.

Ebony screamed in delight and threw her arms around me with a grin on her face. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" she laughed. "Oh my god, thank you PJ! I don't think I had it in me to pack Jade up again."

"Herschel said that we can start moving into the house ASAP," I told her. "He also wants us to go to the funeral. I don't think much will be said but I agreed to that to."

"Look at you being all domesticated," Ebony teased as the two of us headed towards our tent. "Thank you, PJ. Thank you."

I shrugged. "It's nothing overly dramatic hun. Now go do whatever you were doing, I gotta talk to Rick."

Ebony rubbed my shoulder as I headed off to find Rick. I found the fearless leader finishing up an aggressive conversation with Lori, Andrea, Dale and T-Dog. I cleared my throat to catch Rick's attention. "Mind if we talk?" I asked him. "Herschel asked for me and Eb's to stay."

Rick sighed. "Sure." He headed off towards the barn and I followed. "What did you want to talk to me?" he asked me, once we were away from prying eyes.

"Well first of all I think we need to talk about how I kissed you," I sighed. "That's all that's on the agenda but we need to talk about it."

"What's there to talk about?" Rick frowned. "It was a mistake."

"Lori's pregnant so yeah we should forget it," I agreed. "I'd like to start again-sans attacking you and making out with you." I offered him my hand. "PJ Lucas."

"Rick Grimes," he smiled.

We shook hands.

"See?" I smiled. "Much better. And congratulations on bub-it sucks that Herschel is kicking you out. Maybe I can manage-"

Rick shook his head. "No. Don't push your luck-we'll manage."

I nodded. "Ok. Thank you. Better go back before baby mama thinks I'm doing something dubious."

We headed back to help the others with the bodies.

I could have kissed him again, bloody hell I wanted to but I couldn't be that person who jumps in between a marriage no matter how bad it really was.


	15. Chapter 15

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++ **

**Fifteen**

Not much was said at the funeral.

A couple words out of a bible from Herschel about Shawn and Annette, some tears from the both Maggie and Beth but the rest of us were like statues. Ebony had managed to find this skin tight black dress in the clothes we had salvaged and practically forced me into wearing it with my boots and this little red jacket-it wasn't tactically sound but it was a lot cooler. My side arm was strapped to my thigh as always. Even if I didn't have my bow on me at this point, I was never really unarmed.

Once the funeral was over I went back side-by-side with Ebony and Jade, my rabbit skipping and playing around ahead of us with Sophia. My best friend had been in a constant happy mood since we had been asked to stay by Herschel. Although she was sad because Carol wasn't allowed to stay and I think given that their pasts were so similar they had become so close.

"What does Velox mean?" Carl asked, walking behind me with Lori and Rick. "You have it tattooed on your arm."

Rick cleared his throat. "Yeah I noticed it on your dog tags as well. What does it mean?"

"It's my call sign," I answered, looking ahead. "It's Latin for speedy. I'm fast, quick, nimble, my actions are quick but so is my mind. It's a family thing, we all have Latin call signs. It's a bit of a family tradition," I told them. "When we turn eighteen our father gives us our call sign after we enlist. Six generations of my family have been marines-father's, cousins, brothers. I'm actually the first girl to be born to our family line."

"That must have been hard growing up in a family of boys," Lori pointed out.

I shrugged. "Not really. I wasn't treated any differently. There was seven of us. Me, Michael and Matthew. Or Robur and Calculo, Latin for strength and calculator. They're twins but never have you met any two boys that are too different. Then you've got Theo or Caligo which is Latin for darkness. Followed by Kevin-his call sign is Latro, its Latin for Hunter. He was Delta Special Forces-haven't seen him in months. My second eldest brother is Jacob-he's a doctor, dad called him Medicus. First born is my brother John, call sign Rex which is Latin for King."

"That's some tribe you have there," Carol pointed out.

"You should see Christmas," I laughed. There was a sudden pang of sadness in my heart…I missed them terribly. All of them. Even John who was the biggest ass hole of them all. I stopped dead, eyeing Herschel as he lingered around the barn.

"Babe?" Ebony frowned. She knew how close I was with my siblings, I'm pretty sure that there had been something between her and Jacob at some point-he adored Jade like she was his own. They'd even went on a date at one point. If the world hadn't gone to shit, she and Jacob would have had that second date.

"I'm gonna go talk to Herschel, go on," I urged her. I turned and walked over to Herschel. The closer I got, the more it looked like he was up to something. "Heading somewhere?" I asked him.

"You don't miss a thing do you?" he answered.

I shrugged. "I like to think that I'm on the ball," I smirked. "Where are you heading?" I asked him. "To do something stupid I imagine?"

"I'm going into town," he told me. "For a drink. Alone."

"Great," I answered. "I'm coming with you." Herschel stepped away from me but I grabbed his shoulder. "Come on, Herschel, if you're gonna get blithered at least let me keep an eye on you. Plus you should always have a designated driver."

He stared at me. Herschel thought it over and eventually he gave in. "Ok. Fine."

I grinned. "I'll drive."

We headed towards my Jeep and in twenty minutes the two of us were in a nice little bar back in town enjoying a fantastic forty year old Craig with nothing but peace and quiet between the two of us. We stayed there, the two of us, like that for a couple of hours, only a single walker disrupting the peace-I stabbed him in the head with my boot knife. We went back to our whisky. It was just about night time when Rick and Glenn found us at the bar, midway through a second bottle of scotch.

"There you are," Rick sighed, leaning up against the bar. "We've been worried sick about you both. Herschel, we need you back at the farm."

"Why?" Herschel asked him. "I've been safe, PJ was with me the whole time."

I raised my shot glass and saluted Rick before knocking it back. I poured myself another, "take a load off, boys."

"Beth's sick," Rick frowned. "Drowning your sorrows in alcohol won't help. Herschel I understand. You thought there was a cure. You can't blame yourself for holding out for hope."  
"Hope?" he laughed. "When I first saw you running across my field with your boy in your arms, I had a little hope he would survive."  
"But he did," Rick pointed out.  
"He did," Herschel agreed. "Even though we lost Otis. Your man Shane made it back and we saved your boy. That was the miracle that proved to me miracles do exist. Only it was a sham, a bait and switch. I was a fool, Rick, and you people saw that. My daughters deserve better than that."  
Rick stared at Herschel. "I promised Maggie that I'd bring you home safe. So what's your plan, Herschel? Finish that bottle? Drink yourself to death and leave your girls alone?"

Rick was baiting him.  
"Stop telling me how to care for my family, my farm!" Herschel snapped. "You people are like a plague! I do the Christian thing, give you shelter, and you destroyed it all!"  
"The world was already in bad shape when we met," Rick pointed out.  
"And you take responsibility!" he shouted. "You're supposed to be their leader!"  
"Well, I'm here now, aren't I?" Rick asked him.  
"Yes," Herschel sighed. "Yes. Yes, you are."  
"Now come on," Rick urged. "Your girls need you now, more than ever."

Herschel sighed. He knew that Rick was right but was having a hard time saying it. "I didn't want to believe you. You told me there was no cure, that these people were dead, not sick. I chose not to believe it. But when Shane shot Lou in the chest and she just kept coming, that's when I knew what an ass I've been. That Annette had been dead long ago and I was feeding a rotten corpse! That's when I knew there was no hope. And when that little girl came out of the barn, the look on your face - I knew you knew it too. Right? There is no hope. And you know it, like I do. Don't you? There is no hope for any of us."

I opened my mouth, ready to suggest that we take this back to the farm when the double doors crashed open, revealing two scruffy looking men-one short and fat, the other tall and skinny. Both were armed and had that glint in their eyes like they had just seen something they liked and were going to do whatever they could to get it. I sat the glass down on the counter and rested my hand on my gun.

"Evening gentlemen," Rick nodded, politely.

"I'm Dave," the tall one declared. He looked at me and licked his lips slightly. "That scrawny-looking douche bag is Tony."

"Eat me, Dave," Tony grumbled.

"Hey," Dave smirked. "Maybe someday I will."

"Aren't you two worried about the walkers?" I asked him, looking at their pitiful excuse for protection.

"Walkers?" Dave laughed. "That what you call them?"

Glenn nodded. "Yeah."

Dave nodded. "That's good. I like that. I like that better than lamebrains."

"More succinct," Tony announced. He was trying to act smarter than he was. I didn't like the look he was giving me. Every so often their eyes would return to me making me think today was a bad day to be wearing a dress.

"Ok," Dave laughed. "Tony went to college."

"Two years," Tony smirked.

Want a medal? I asked myself.

"You all look like you could use come company," Dave announced, nodding in my direction. "Especially you, honey."

"Don't call me that," I answered back.

Rick stepped in front of me, putting me out of view. We don't know anything about you."  
"No, that's true," Dave nodded. "You don't know anything about us. You don't what we had to go through out there, the things we've had to do. I bet you've had to do some of those things yourself. Am I right? 'Cause ain't nobody's hands clean in what's left of this world. We're all the same."

"Where you from?" Rick asked them. He didn't like anything about them-I could see it in the way he was holding himself.  
"Philadelphia," Tony answered.  
"You fellas are a long way from Philadelphia," Rick pointed out.  
"Feels like we're a long way from anywhere," Dave shrugged.  
"Well, what drove you south?" Rick asked. Typical cop, trying to grab at any sort of information that he could. It was a good trait and given my buzzed state, it was incredibly hot to say the least.  
"Well, I can tell you it wasn't the weather," Dave admitted. "I must have dropped thirty pounds in sweat alone down here."  
"I wish," Tony laughed.  
"No, first it was D.C," Dave continued. "I heard there might be some kind of refugee camp, but the roads were so jammed we never even got close. We decided to get off the highways into the sticks, keep hauling ass. Every group we came across had a new rumour about a way out of this thing."  
"One guy told us there was a coast guard sending in the gulf, sending ferries to the islands," Tony told us. "The latest was a rail yard in Montgomery running trains to the middle of the country, Kansas, Nebraska."  
"Nebraska?" Glenn laughed.  
"Low population, lots of guns," Tony smirked.  
"Kind of makes sense," Glenn shrugged.

Sounded like my family.  
"Ever been to Nebraska, kid?" Dave asked Glenn. "There's a reason they call 'em "flyover states."

"Nice gun," Rick frowned, nodding at Dave's gun.  
"Not bad, huh?" he smirked. "I got it off a cop."  
"I'm a cop," Rick answered, coldly.  
"This one was already dead," Dave laughed.

"We should be getting back," Glenn told Rick. "Beth's sick, you promised Maggie you'd get her back to the farm."

A sick smirk appeared on Dave's face. "Well, hang on a second. This-this farm sounds pretty sweet, don't it sound sweet, Tony?"

Tony nodded. "Yeah, real sweet."  
"Yeah, how about a little Southern hospitality?" Dave asked, moving around the room to get a better view at me. "We got some buddies back at camp, been having a real hard time. I don't see why you can't make room for a few more, we could pool our resources, our manpower. Looks like your friend there needs some more manpower in her life."  
"Look, I'm sorry, that's not an option," Rick answered. His whole body tensed up as Dave singled in one me. It's not that I couldn't defend myself, not at all-I'm a one woman army.  
"Doesn't sound like it'd be a problem," Dave argued. "What's say you, girly?"

"Go suck a lemon," I replied.

"No," Rick snapped.  
"You gotta understand," Dave growled. "We can't stay out there. You know what it's like."  
"Yeah, I do," Rick agreed. "But the farm is too crowded as is. I'm sorry. You'll have to keep looking."  
"Keep looking?" Dave snapped. "Where do you suggest we do that?  
"I hear Nebraska's nice," I retorted.  
"Nebraska?" Dave laughed. "Listen, bitch…"

Before I could argue with Dave any more, Rick pulled out his gun and shot Tony and Dave straight in the head.

I slipped off my seat and walked over towards the window. "We need to leave," I warned Rick.

"Why?" he asked me.

I turned back to Rick. I could see figures running around outside, all armed. "We're not alone."


	16. Chapter 16

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Sixteen**

Glen was going to ask me what I meant when I had said we weren't alone but a voice from outside stopped him.

"Dave? Tony?" the first asked as I crouched down near the door.

"They said over here?" a second replied. I took my gun out and cursed myself for only bringing on clip as a backup and my bowie knife.

"Yeah," the first agreed. "I'm telling you, man. I heard shots."

"I saw roamers, two streets over. Might be more around here." Roamers? Wow, it's amazing some of the names you hear for the undead.

"It's hot, we gotta get out of here."

None of us had any idea who was talking now. Whoever they were, they wouldn't be too happy that Tony and Dave now decorated the bar floor. It was interesting that Rick chose to shoot them in the head…did he know that you don't have to be bitten to become a walker?

"Dave! Tony!"

It was the first man again.

"Shut up, idiot!" the second hushed. "You wanna attract them? Just stick close. We're gonna find our guys."

Two men approached the bar.

I glanced over to Rick and held my gun up with a nod.

"Dude! He said to stay close!" came a third voice. This one was considerably younger than the first two.

"Tony!"

Silence followed as our new friends continued down the side of the bar.

"Rick!" I whispered.

He looked at me.

"I could draw them off," I replied.

Rick shook his head. "No! Who knows what they'll do to you!"

"I don't need your permission," I hissed back. "I'm not part of your group."

"You're part of mine," Herschel cut in. "The answer is no. Rick's right, you don't know what men like that would do to a girl like you."

Girl like me? What the hell did that mean?

Rick ushered me back over to them.

"Why won't they leave?" Glenn whispered.

"Would you?" Herschel asked him.

"We can't sit here any longer," Rick announced. "Let's head out the back and make a run to the car. Where you parked?" he asked me.

"Out back in the alley," I replied. "Rick, I could be useful in leading them away. I was the fastest in my unit."

He shook his head. "No, PJ. We need you here, you're the best out of us with a gun. You may be fast but your gunmanship is what we need if this goes south."

"I got news for you Rick," I retorted. "This is so far south we're in Cuba sipping margaritas on a beach full of landmines."

He smiled at me.

And it was a genuine smile.

Suddenly we heard gunshots and it was back to our positions.

"What happened?" I heard someone asked.

"Roamers, I nailed them," the young guy replied. "They disappeared, but their car's still there."

"I cleared those buildings! You guys get this one?"

Great.

He was taking about the bar.

"No."

"Me neither."

"We're looking for Dave and Tony and no one checks the damn bar?"

I looked over at Rick and signalled for him to head to the door first. No offense intended but if I am the best shot that we have, I should be covering them last. The door beside me started to open and I pushed my back up against it, slamming it shut.

"What?" the first man asked. I was beginning to pick out who owned what voice.

"Someone pushed that shit. There's someone in there!"

"Yo? Is someone in there?"

Silence.

"Yo, if someone's in there, we don't want no trouble. We're just looking for our friends."

The two dead friends on the floor? I asked myself.

The three of them started talking amongst themselves whilst we tried to figure something out.

"We don't want any trouble," the repeated. "We're just looking for our friends. If something happened, tell us. This place is crawling with corpses, if you can help us not get killed, I'd appreciate it."

"They drew on us!" Rick shouted.

There was a collective silent gasp from me, Herschel and Glenn. The poor boy looked frightened as all hell, Herschel was silent, like he was going over everything in his mind and me…well I was itching to shoot something. Sitting here like this was killing me.

"Dave and Tony in there?" we were asked. "They alive?"

"No!" I answered before Rick could.

The men outside paused. Their silence told me that they weren't expecting a woman to be in this situation.

"They killed Tony and Dave!" the third man growled.

"Come on man, let's go."

It ain't never that easy.

"No! I'm not leaving!"

I sighed.

"I'm not telling Jane! I'm not gonna go back and tell them that Dave and Tony got shot by some assholes in a bar!"

"Your friends drew on us!" Rick argued. "They gave us no choice! I'm sure we've all lost enough people, done things we wish we didn't have to, but it's like that now. You know that! So let's just chalk this up to what it was-wrong place, wrong time."

"Maybe you send your girl out and we can talk."

I rolled my eyes. "You know it's that sort of attitude that got your dick weed friends shot you two bit, back street, ass fuck."

That was when they started shooting at us.

Rick and I jumped up. He took the door and I smashed out a chunk of the window before the two of us started firing back. "Get outta here! Go!"

Herschel and Glenn took off running to the back of the bar.

"You're next Rick!" I yelled at him. "And don't be arguing with me! You've got a kid on the way. You can afford to lose me! Go!" I roared.

Rick glanced at me and started making his way to the back of the bar but not before I tossed him the keys to the Jeep.

"Gear sticks in three," I told him. "You be ready to get us the hell out of here."

Time always managed to go so slow in combat. No matter what the actions, no matter what the outcome, time always seemed to slow down. It felt like just a split second had past but in reality the minutes that rolled by told the true tale. In the back of my mind, a small voice announced that it was frightened that I was so at home in this world of carnage and death but she was easy to shit up.

I waited until Rick got to the back of the bar and took off following him. Just as I got to the door, the front double doors slammed open and a shot rang out across the bar. I felt an instant pain shoot through my body, pulsating up from my hip.

Rick caught me when I almost fell. He dragged me out the back, firing at the same time. "You're bleeding!" he whispered in a frantic tone when he put me down. He took a hold of the torn fabric of the dress and ripped it down sideways exposing the wound as well as the black panties I was wearing.

"Anything to get into my pants," I gritted in pain.

"PJ this is serious!" Rick grumbled. He looked around for something to stop the bleeding. "This isn't the time to be joking."

"Who's joking?" I laughed. "I was serious. It's just a flesh wound."

"Can you two stop flirting!" Glenn growled. "We need to get to the Jeep in the alley."

"Flirting?" I gasped. "Damn it Herschel!" I hissed as the veterinarian tried to stop the bleeding with an old cloth or something. "This isn't flirting." For a flesh wound this hurt like a mother. It's like getting a paper cut.

"You'll need stitches," Herschel announced. "It's a little more than a flesh wound PJ, we have to stop this bleeding. I'll stay here with PJ whilst you and Glenn sort out our escape plan."

Rick nodded and then went to stand up but I grabbed his arm. "PJ?"

"I'm not gonna lie," I mumbled. "I'm not sorry about that kiss."

Rick stared at me whilst Herschel and Glenn observed in stunned silence. He squeezed my arm tightly for a brief second before I let him go sort out a plan with Glenn.

Herschel helped me stand up. The two of us watched Glenn and Rick disappear outside. "You kissed him?" Herschel asked me.

I nodded.

"Right," was all he said.

The two of us waited until I heard the familiar sound of the Jeep start. It was only than that we headed outside. Herschel handed me off the Glenn the moment we saw one of our shooters with his leg impaled on a fence.

"Well that's new," I retorted.

"Put her in the car," Herschel ordered Glenn.

I could feel the blood rolling down my leg as Glenn helped me into the Jeep.

I wanted to close my eyes for just a moment.

I was safe in the Jeep…the last thing I remembered was Glenn shouting walkers and the sound of gun shots before I passed out.


	17. Chapter 17

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Seventeen**

The next couple of days past on the farm pretty much without incident.

Rick had driven us back to camp-all five of us.

Ebony had been a mixture of pissed and upset to see Rick carry me out of the car and into the house so that Herschel could stitch me up. I woke up a few hours after we got back to the farm and wasn't allowed to do much except rest considering I'd been wounded twice in a week.

The prisoner that Rick had brought back to the farm with us was called Randall, according to Ebony. Daryl had interrogated Randall and he had revealed that his group was made up of thirty men that were starving and willing to do anything to have some food. Shane and Rick had almost let Randall go until he had revealed that he knew Maggie and that he knew where the farm was.

It was because of that information that he was now sitting in the barn, tied up and not allowed to leave until the group came up with a decision as to what to do with him.

The general consensus was execution.

Something which Ebony begged me to stay far away from.

So I complied.

During my time 'off the playing field' I took to teaching Carl and Sophia about various plants that you could eat if you ever got lost and ways to survive if they were ever separated from the group. It was my idea that Carl should carry a gun on him and Sophia at least a knife but neither parents would hear of it.

Rick was avoiding me-most likely because of what I said to him and because the whole group now knew that Lori was pregnant. He'd spoken few words to me since I'd woken up and each time I went to speak to him he rushed off to talk to another member of the group.

It was hard to believe that it had been eighty-one days since total wildfire had been declared. I'd woken up early in the evening ready and willing to start hunting for some food. I was hoping that Daryl would accompany me since we'd never really spent any time together. Since now the group was staying it was Daryl and me doing any of the wilderness work that was required.

Hunting, tracking, foraging-that was us.

I got up, showered, dressed in a pair of jeans, my boots and a red tank top. I strapped my quiver on and grabbed my bow before heading downstairs to look for Daryl.

"Evening," Ebony smiled. She put down the knife she was using to cut up some tomatoes and came over to check my stitches. "I think you can stay in bed for the rest of the day."

I shook my head. "Sorry, Eb's."

"It's dark," Ebony argued.

I shrugged. "We need something other than chicken to pass us by. I'm going hunting, where's Daryl?" I asked her.

"Outside," Carol answered. "He didn't want to come and play nice with the rest of us."

I laughed and grabbed a tomato off the bench. "I'll let you know when we go," I told Ebony.

"Aunty Jay!" Jade screamed. She came running into the kitchen with Sophia and Carl close behind her. "Are you going to play with us after dinner?"

I knelt down and shook my head. "Sorry, rabbit. I've got grown up stuff to do."

Jade's bottom lip disappeared. "But Aunty Jay-"

"We gotta eat, rabbit," I told her.

"Why do you call her rabbit?" Sophia questioned.

"Rabbits are my favourite!" Jade declared.

"Can I have a cool nickname?" Sophia asked.

I nodded. "What's your favourite animal?"

"A dove!" Sophia declared.

"Mine's a wolf!" Carl jumped right in.

I laughed. "Ok. The rabbit, the dove and the wolf. Play nice you three."

Carol looked at me when the kids took off, imitating the animals I had just named them. "You're good with kids. Ever thought about having any of your own?"

Ebony snorted with laughter.

"Really?" I exclaimed. "Eb's babe-Perhaps I should nick name you piggy?" Suddenly I felt the urge to take this moment to escape the kitchen when Ebony threw a cucumber at me.

There was a slight chill on the air when I stepped outside-it was a perfect evening but there was an irony tinge to the air. I went to my Jeep and found the rest of the bottle of whisky I had stashed and was meaning to use as a bribe for Daryl. Eventually I found Daryl sitting at his own little campfire where I invited myself to sit down.

"Piss off," he grumbled at me.

I opened the bottle of whisky and held it out. "Drink?"

Daryl snatched the bottle off me. "What do you want?"

"I wanna start hunting," I announced, telling him my plans. "Thought you'd tag along."

Daryl stared at me. "Why would I wanna help you?"

"Because we both recognise skill when we see it," I replied.

Daryl paused to think it over.

As we sat there in silence we could both hear the faint sound of screaming.

"That almost sounds like-" I started.

"Dale," Daryl finished.

The two of us shot up like a flash and ran towards the fence line. The closer we got, the louder the screaming got until Daryl found Dale on the ground with a walker ripping into him. Daryl tackled the walker to the ground and stabbed it in the head. I pulled Dale's shirt out of the way to survey the damage…it was bad.

The walker had eviscerated Dale.

Dale grabbed my hand and gripped it tightly. There was a look in his eyes…the look of a man who knew that he was about to die and didn't want to die alone.

Daryl came up beside me. "HELP!" he yelled. "OVER HERE!"

"Where?" Andrea shouted in the distance.

"There's so much blood," I whispered. "Daryl-"

"HELP!" Daryl shouted, waving his arms in the air. "RUN!"

I could see lights approaching us.

"Hang in there, buddy," Daryl pleaded with Dale.

Dale wasn't going to make it. We didn't have the technology any more to save a man when his guts were hanging out of his body.

"Who is it?" Carol shouted.

The group came to a combined stop and each of them-even Shane-was frozen in horror.

"PJ move!" Rick ordered.

I glared at him. "Kiss my ass Rick," I snapped.

Rick tried tapped Dale's face to keep him awake. "Listen to me, all right? Just listen to me. All right? Ok, hold on now. GET HERSCHEL!" he yelled.

Andrea knelt down beside me.

"He needs blood!" Rick yelled. "We got to operate now!"

"Hang on, Dale," Andrea pleaded. "Hang on!"

"There's nothing to hang on to," I whispered.

Herschel came running towards us with Lori, Ebony and Glenn.

"Can we move him?" Rick gasped.

Herschel shook his head, examining Dale. "He won't make the trip."

"You have to do the operation here!" Rick told him. He stood. "Glenn! Get back to the house!"

Herschel put his hand on Rick's shoulder and shook his head.

Rick turned. "NO!" he screamed.

Dale's grip on my hand tightened as he searched everyone's faces for anything other than pain. I closed my eyes. I should have gotten to know him better…I should get to know them all better and enjoy what little time we have left in this world. I could very well die tomorrow. When I opened my eyes I saw Daryl take Rick's gun off him and aim it at Dale's head.

"Sorry brother," Daryl whispered.

Dale smiled.

And Daryl pulled the trigger.

* * *

I sat in that field all night.

Kneeling right beside where Dale's body had been up until the sun had rose.

I really needed someone to talk to.

I made my way to the house, my hands stained with Dale's dry blood. I should wash them.

Carol pointed me in the direction of the barn when I approached her-she knew I needed to talk to Ebony. Dale was well liked by just about everyone.

When I got to the barn I stuck my head in the side door only to be greeted by a series of moans coming from deep within the haystacks. Intrigued I headed into the barn and froze at the sight of Daryl and Ebony stark naked in a large pile of hay.

Daryl and Ebony were having sex.

He caressed her face ever so gently before swooping in to steal a kiss from her. Ebony eagerly kissed him, moans like I've never heard before coming from her. Daryl wasn't exactly silent about it either.

Holy shit, Batman!

I took off out of the barn as quick as my feet would carry me.

There was no way in hell I wanted to see any more of that.

I guess we all deal with the loss of someone differently.

I guess…


	18. Chapter 18

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Eighteen**

Ebony was humming when she came back to our room, a huge grin plastered all over her face. "There you are!" she smiled. "I've been looking for you."

Yeah I bet you have.

In the time that you were 'looking for me', I had showered, changed, packed a small bag and the Jeep to go hunting for a couple of days. I think now it was universally accepted that I don't do funerals. This was why Rick had been ok with me going hunting for a couple of days with Daryl to accompany me.

"You, Ebony Valery Hewitt are a sultry little wench," I told her. I stood up and finished strapping my quiver on the black leather jacket I was wearing. It was one I had been given by Ebony not long after she moved it. On the sleeves of the jacket were blood red claw marks engrained into the leather.

I loved it.

"What are you talking about?" she asked me. Ebony battered her eyes all innocently but I knew…

"You were having sex in the barn with Daryl," I pointed out. "And don't deny it because I saw you."

Ebony stared at me. "I-"

I hugged her. "I'm happy for you babe," I smiled. "You deserve it."

She hugged me back. "You going hunting?" Ebony asked me. She started rattling through her things to look for something nice for Jade to wear to Dale's funeral.

I nodded. "Yeah. Rick was cool with it. Me and Daryl will be going for a couple of days," I smirked.

Ebony shook her head. "No way in hell! You can't torment him."

I smirked. "Oh babe, you have no idea."

Ebony threw a roll of socks at me just as I slipped out of the room.

Daryl was waiting by the Jeep when I came outside. I threw the keys at him.

"You're driving," I told him. I sat in the passenger seat and slipped my sunnies back on my face. "Onwards."

He ignored me.

Daryl and I soon found a small clearing to park the Jeep in not too far off the highway and set up the camp site. We spent a majority of the morning hunting down a deer only to find it being chomped on my some walkers. This left us empty handed so we carried on back to some of our snares we had set.

Successfully I might add.

We had three rabbits, a couple of squirrel's and a dog.

Daryl and I just stood there and stared at each other when it came to the dog.

In the end I let him have the honours.

We spent the rest of the afternoon skinning the animals we had hunted. This would be enough food to last a week-maybe more. What we really needed was a big animal like a deer or maybe a cow.

That night as we sat there discussing our movements the following day Daryl suggested that we make for some of the neighbouring farms and try a kill us a cow or two. We also needed to start stockpiling supplies for winter because what we had was nowhere near enough.

The walkers would hopefully be slower during winter but we weren't holding our breath.

I was about to turn in and Daryl was gonna take the first watch when we saw a bright orange glow in the distance.

"That's coming from the farm," Daryl pointed out.

"Motherfucker," I replied.

Daryl dug the keys out of his pocket at the two of us took off to the Jeep.

I sat in the back and loaded my rifle. "Drive!" I shouted.

Daryl didn't need to be asked twice.

He practically floored it to the farm, breaking every possible speed limit to get there-well if there was speed limits.

When we arrived at the farm the place was in total chaos.

"GO!" I shouted at Daryl when we skidded to a stop in front of the farm house. I positioned myself in the back of the Jeep and started taking as many head shots as I could.

Daryl jumped out and headed straight for his motorbike…

God everything was just…

"EBONY!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. "EBONY!"

I heard Jade scream.

My eyes scanned everything from the walkers that were coming towards me to the humans running around trying to escape. Finally I settled onto Jade and Sophia who were huddled on the front desk of the house behind Herschel. Both girls were screaming their heads off.

"JADE!" I yelled. "SOPHIA!"

I jumped out of the Jeep and ran to the front of the house where Herschel was taking shots at the walkers. "Herschel?" I frowned, pulling at his arm.

The old man glared at me. "This is my farm, PJ. I will die here."

I nodded. "Alright…" Letting him go I grabbed the two girls and ushered them to the Jeep. Those girls would be my main priority-get them to safety-fight second.

"Get down on the floor!" I shouted as I started the Jeep up.

Sophia huddled on the floor but Jade threw her arms around my neck.

She was terrified.

I slammed my foot down on the gas and took off down the driveway of the property.

Then I saw Ebony.

She was handling herself pretty well with a shot gun but Ebony didn't see the herd closing in on her.

"EBONY!" I screamed. Slowing the Jeep down I reached out and we grabbed for each other.

"DON'T LET GO!" Ebony screamed.

I couldn't slow down otherwise the walkers would rip us all apart. "NEVER!" I shouted, trying to keep a grip on her at the same time I was focusing on the road and Jade clung to me. Jade screamed in my ear. She was in hysterics, every time something touched her or we hit something, she would scream louder and louder.

Ebony's grip lessened on my hand as the walkers pulled at her.

"EBONY!" I screamed again, grunting. I tried to get a better grip on her.

Suddenly everything just froze.

Ebony and I stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity in a moment.

All I could see was her chestnut brown eyes and the entirety of our sisterhood in one glance.

There was nothing I could do…

I love you, I mouthed at her.

Then…

I let go of her hand…


	19. Chapter 19

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Nineteen**

I didn't know where to go or what to do so I just drove.

As I drove, the girls in the back of the Jeep slept.

Both Sophia and Jade had cried themselves to sleep, I wanted nothing more than to comfort Jade but…I let her mother's hand go…

I let Ebony's hand go…

Oh god I let her hand go…

I started to cry.

So I drove and so I cried.

Crying was a foreign concept to me.

I'd never cried like I was crying right now.

Eventually I was forced to pull over to get my bearings. I grabbed the map out of the glove box and got out so that I could spread it across the hood. Soon I realised that I was in fact not too far from the highway so maybe…just maybe the others would meet up at a familiar spot like the highway where they'd left supplies for Sophia.

When I folded the map up, Jade was sitting up in the back seat, staring at me with those big blue eyes red raw from crying. "Where's mama?" she asked me.

I slammed the car door shut and leant against the outside of the Jeep.

"Where is mama?" Jade asked in a muffled voice. She hit her little hands up against the soft top plastic window. "Where is mama?" she repeated, now crying.

That I couldn't deal with right now…I couldn't take care of Jade, knowing that I had killed her mother. I closed my eyes, hoping for some kind of reprieve only to play that scene in my head over and over again. I slipped down until I hit the ground and buried my face in my knees, my whole body shook as I sobbed violently and uncontrollably. It could have be seconds or minutes or hours that I sat there screaming into my knees until my throat was sore.

Suddenly someone placed a cool hand on my shoulder.

When I snapped my head up I saw Lori standing above me, concern splashed all over her face. "PJ are you ok?" she asked me.

I shook my head.

"We're heading to the highway," Lori advised me. She knelt down in front of me, "can you drive?"

I nodded.

"Do you need anything?" Lori questioned.

"Take Sophia and Jade," I begged her. "I can't…Lori…I let her hand go…I let Ebony's hand go…I let her mother die."

Lori's eyes flickered for a split second but she hid it well. She stood up and opened the door so Sophia and Jade could climb out. "Come on girls," she smiled. "Get in the car with Beth and T-Dog,"

Jade came over to me and tried to put her arms around me but I held her at arm's length. "Go with Lori, Jade," I told her. "I can't…I just can't…"

Jade burst into tears as she ran towards the pickup truck.

"I'll drive," Lori told me. She did the best that she could getting me to my feet. Jade was sobbing in the seat next to Sophia so I slammed the door to shut out the sound. Each cry was like a knife in my heart.

T-Dog waited until we were in the Jeep before he started driving again.

Lori followed.

Soon enough we managed to hook up with Carol and Daryl on his Harley, then Glenn and Maggie in the Tucson. They were all heading towards the jam on the highway. All of them had the same idea. All that was missing was Rick, Carl and Herschel.

When we stopped the three missing members of the group came out of hiding….everyone had someone to go to. Maggie and Beth to their father, Lori to Carl and Rick, Carol to Sophia…

"What's wrong with PJ?" Rick asked Lori. He stared into the Jeep at me, I just stared out the window.

Lori shook her head. "Ebony's dead," she whispered.

"Where'd you find everyone?" Rick asked Daryl.

Daryl shrugged. "Well, those guys tail lights zigzagging all over the road. Figured he'd have to be Asian driving like that."

Glenn laughed at him. "Good one,"

"Where's the rest of us?" Daryl asked.

"We're the only ones who made it so far," Rick replied.

I got out of the car as Daryl asked about Ebony. "She's dead," I answered.

"Shane?" Lori asked over the top of Daryl's horror.

Judging by the look on his face the tryst in the barn had been more than a one-time thing. Jade jumped out of the car and ran over to Daryl. Judging by her familiarity with him-it certainly was. He picked her up and she cried into his chest…that broke my heart.

I turned around and saw a walker heading toward us. Taking my knife out of my boot I started towards the walker, ignoring what everyone else was saying. I pushed the corpse down to the ground and stabbed it in the head.

Over and over and over again whilst I screamed.

Whatever I was saying was making no sense in my head at all, nor as it came out of my mouth. Rick pulled me up and off the walker.

So I punched him. "LET ME GO!" I yelled. "I have to go back!"

"PJ!" Rick called out. "It's too dangerous!" He rubbed his jaw but refused to let me go. "I'm not letting you go!"

I punched him again.

Rick still wouldn't let me go.

He slammed me up against the side of an abandoned car. "PHILOMENA JOCELYN LUCAS!" he yelled out. "Stop it!"

My eyes widened and I let my arms fall limp by my side.

Rick let me go and stepped back. "We good?"

"Far from it," I replied.

I walked back to the Jeep, ignoring the looks I was getting from the people who were all I had left in the world. Even then I didn't know any of them.

I sat in the passenger seat of the car and waited whilst they all discussed where we were going. Finally they sorted out the cars and after a quick whispering discussion Lori let Rick drive the Jeep with me.

Daryl gently put Jade, who was now asleep, in the Tucson with Carol and Sophia with her for protection. I watched him as he pushed her hair back out of her face and kissed her lightly on the head. He pulled something from around his neck and put it around Jade's-I couldn't tell what it was but I wanted to find out.

Soon the convoy was off.

We continued driving until Herschel's wagon ran out of gas and we were forced to stop. Before Rick got out of the car he turned to me. "Are you ok?"

"I killed my best friend," I snapped back.

Rick put his hand on my shoulder. "I need you PJ. You've got a head on your shoulders that I need. Can you do that for me?" he asked.

I paused.

How could I?

I killed Ebony.

"Philomena?" Rick frowned.

I nodded slowly.

"Thank you," he smiled.

We got out of the car and Daryl turned to Herschel. "You out?"

"Running on fumes," he replied.

"We can't stay here," Maggie pointed out.

"We can't all fit in two cars," Glenn pointed out.

"We'll have to make a run for some gas in the morning," Rick decided.

"Spend the night?" Carol frowned. She looked to Sophia and Jade who were in the car.

"I'm freezing," Carl shivered.

"We'll build a fire, yeah?" Lori asked.

"If you go out looking for firewood, stay close," Daryl suggested. "Only got so many arrows. How you doing on ammo?"

"Not enough," Rick declared.

"We can't just sit here with our asses hanging out," Maggie pointed out.

"Watch your mouth," Herschel told his daughter. "Everyone stop panicking and listen to Rick."

Rick paused. "All right, we'll set up a perimeter. In the morning, PJ and I will find gas and some supplies. PJ?"

I nodded. "I've got a spare quiver in the back full of arrows and a couple boxes of rifle ammo for the Winchester."

"Glenn and I can go and make a run now," Maggie offered. "Try and scrounge up some gas."

Rick shook his head. "No. We stay together. God forbid something happens and people get stranded without a car."

"Rick, we're stranded now," Glenn replied.

"I know it looks bad," Rick frowned. "We've all been through hell and worse, but at least we found each other. I wasn't sure, I really wasn't, but we did. We're together. We keep it that way."

Everyone was silent.

"We'll find shelter somewhere. There's gotta be a place," Rick told us all.

"Rick look around," Glenn argued. "There's walker's everywhere. They're migrating or something."

"Not enough food in the cities," I mumbled.

"There's gotta be a place not just where we hole up, but that we fortify," Rick retorted. There was so much hope in his voice. "Hunker down, pull ourselves together, build a life for each other. I know it's out there. We just have to find it."

"I'm game," I shrugged. Anything not to drown in my pain.

"Even if we do find a place we think is safe," Maggie cut in, "we can never be sure for how long. Look what happened at the farm. We fooled ourselves into thinking that that was safe."

"We won't make that mistake again." Herschel was very sure off himself.

"We should make camp tonight over there," I pointed to the structure off the road.

Rick stared at me.

"You need you needed the head on my shoulders so this is me using my head," I answered his look. "And Rick-I think you should tell them."

"Tell us what?" Lori demanded to know.

Rick's look asked the same.

"About the virus," I answered.

He sighed. There was a long pause as two conflicting sides of Rick did war with each other. "We're all infected," Rick finally blurted out.

This was followed by stunned silence.

Daryl was the first to speak. "What?"

"At the C.D.C.," Rick confessed. "Jenner told me. Whatever it is, we all carry it."

"And you never said anything?" Carol gasped.

"Would it have made a difference?" he asked her.

"You knew this whole time?" Glenn snapped.

"How could I have known for sure?" Rick questioned. "You saw how crazy that mo..."

"That is not your call," Glenn argued. "Okay, when I found about the Walkers in the barn, I told, for the good of everyone."

"Well, I thought it best that people didn't know," Rick responded. He turned to me, "how did you know?"

"I'm a marine," I answered honestly. "I knew the moment our commander told us to go be with our families. We watched a woman give herself a bleach cocktail and after she died she reanimated. It was easy to pick after that. I thought you all knew."

My bad.

I headed back to the jeep whilst everyone argued with Rick over another poor decision made by him. I briefly heard mention that Shane had been killed…good riddance to bad rubbish.

Soon after we all set up camp and let me tell you, the dissidence amongst the troops would have been considered treason back when the world was in full spin. It didn't take long for Rick to snap and believe me, when he snapped-boy did he snap.

I watched as I sat atop one of the ruined structures looking down on Jade who was sleeping with Sophia near Lori. Every now and then as Daryl came through the site he'd kneel down to see how she was doing… We could hear sounds in the woods-probably a stray walker or an animal but I hoped we were all safe.

"Don't panic," Herschel and Rick repeated at the same time.

"I'm not. I'm not sitting here, waiting for another herd to blow through. We need to move, now," Maggie snapped.

"No one is going anywhere!" Rick exclaimed.

"Do something!" Carol snapped. "There's children here!

"I am doing something!" Rick snapped. "I'm keeping this group together. Alive! I've been doing that all along, no matter what-I didn't ask for this! I killed my best friend for you people, for Christ sake!"

Maybe I should have been paying more attention to that conversation.

"You saw how he was like. How he pushed me, how he compromised us, how he threatened us," he continued. "He staged the whole Randall thing, let me out to put a bullet in my back. He gave me no choice! He was my friend, but he came after me. My hands are clean. Maybe you people are better off without me. Go ahead. I say there's a place for us, but maybe- maybe it's just another pipe dream. Maybe- Maybe I'm fooling myself again. Why don't- why don't you go out and find yourself. Send me a postcard! Go on, there's the door. You can do better. Let's see how far you get."

Rick waited for someone to say something.

"No takers? Fine. But get one thing straight...you're staying," he growled. "This isn't a democracy anymore."

Yeah, I snorted, it's a Ricktatorship.


	20. Chapter 20

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty**

During the middle of the night as everyone was sleeping and Rick and Daryl paced the perimeter I managed to sneak away. I wasn't planning on hitting it out on my own but my intention was to head back to the campsite where Daryl and I had set up. There was a couple days' worth of food stocked for the two of us as well as a spare can of gas. The food would hopefully be enough breakfast the next morning.

It took me most of the night to find the encampment, there were a few walkers, I managed to dodge a herd but eventually I found what I was looking for. In the early hours of the morning with minimal light I packed up our tent, put the bag of food and started on back towards the group.

When I pulled up Rick was standing there staring at me with the best impression of Sam Winchester's bitchface I have ever seen. Well look who's in trouble now, I thought to myself when I got out of the Jeep. "Morning Rick," I sighed.

"Where have you been?" Rick asked me. "I thought I made it clear that no one left the camp without my express say so."

"Even for food?" I asked him. I tossed the bag at his feet. "The kids are starving so get off your high horse and take them the dang food."

Dang…Ebony used to say that.

Rick snatched the bag up off the ground and stalked back to the camp. I watched him pass by Jade who was sitting there in Daryl's lap counting something on her fingers. He looked at her with a soft, genuine smile and rested his head on top of her cash of blonde hair. She looked happy…sad but…happy.

Suck it up, PJ, I told myself, go and talk to her.

I sighed and made my way over towards Daryl and Jade, the closer I got to them, the more I could make out what Jade was wearing around her neck. It was a small fire opal about the size of a ten cent piece, it was resting in a white gold pendant attached to a fine white chain. Daryl glanced up at me and covered Jade's ears so that she couldn't hear us. "It's about bloody time you came to talk to her. She's been askin' about you."

I crossed my arms. "Daryl-I needed some time. You can't expect me to be able to sit there and nurse her and take care of her when I killed her mother."

He sat Jade down on the log beside him and stood up to face me. "You need to get your head out of your ass, PJ cause this little girl needs you."

"What's with the necklace?" I asked him. "I know it was Eb's but why do you have it? And more importantly, how long have you and Ebony been having sex with each other?" Daryl stared at me like it was none of my business. "And yes it is my business," I added. "She was my friend."

"The necklace was her grandmother's," Daryl replied. "She gave it to me because she said I had a better chance at surviving than she did and that she wanted Jade to have it."

I was lost at this comment. Why didn't Ebony give it to me to give to Jade? Did she think that I wasn't going to be around to tell look after her?

"Are you going to look after Jade?" Daryl asked me.

At this point Carol decided to join our conversation. She came over to the two of us and cleared her throat to grab our attention. "I'll look after Jade," Carol offered. "Her and Sophia are practically sisters now so I can look after her."

Daryl shook his hand. "No. PJ can look after her."

"Rick's already picked his people," Carol pointed out. "Obviously you two are the ones Rick will turn to when he needs something done. Neither of you can be that someone with a child hanging off you. You two are his hands now."

"Thank you," I smiled meekly to Carol. She was right, even if I wanted to focus any sort of attention on Jade, Daryl and I seemed to be Rick's appointed right and left hands now. Turning to Daryl I added, "we should report in."

Daryl grabbed his cross bow and the two of us headed towards Rick as he was sorting through the bag I had brought back with breakfast. I'm so glad that Daryl spoke first. "So what's the plan Rick?" he inquired.

Rick focused his attention all on me. "PJ, you've been in the area longer-what do you suggest?" he asked me.

"We head for my granddaddy's farm," I replied. "That's where Eb's and me were heading when we left New York. That's where any off my family would head. Man's a paranoid insane loony-all the heads of my family are. When his granddaddy brought the land back in the early twenties he built tunnels all over the property that lead from the house to various exit points-it's well fortified."

"What's the problem?" Rick asked me.

"We gotta make our way to Lakeland in Florida," I told Rick. "It's a seven hour drive but considering we have jack shit in the way of gas and winter is coming we gotta look to bunkering down if we can. If you wanna head that way than I suggest it's a good idea if me and Daryl take the Jeep and look for more gas-I'm not liking this but we'll have to head into the city. See if we can get gas out of some of the abandoned cars."

Rick shook his head. "Absolutely not. We need to map our way away from this heard."

"How do you suggest we do that?" I asked him.

"I was going to ask if you had an idea," he replied.

I paused. "Maybe one but with a herd that size it may not work for long, a couple days at best."

"I'm all ears," Rick answered.

"Well these things are all about sound," I explained. "Daryl could hotwire a car and we could turn the radio on really loudly. It will attract them but it will only buy us a few days at best to get a head of them-even then we have no idea if there are other herds out there. I'm guessing that there will be."

Daryl nodded his agreement.

Rick paused. "Do what you can. Be back by lunch time because we are moving on."

"Yes sir," I replied.

"We'll take me bike," Daryl informed me. "Easier."

I nodded my agreement.

We headed towards Daryl's bike but before I got on behind him I needed to know something. "Daryl-you and Eb's-"

"It was the night you and Rick didn't come back from the supply run," he told me. "She was worried about ya and wanted to head out but I stopped her."

"With your penis?" I smirked.

Daryl rolled his eyes. "It wasn't like that-he stopped when he saw the smirk on my face. "She was a good friend, she loved ya a lot."

"I know," I nodded. I got on the bike behind him, "what type of person does that make me?" I frowned. "I was the one that let her go."

For that, Daryl didn't have an answer.


	21. Chapter 21

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-One**

Two hundred and seventeen days ago that herd that ripped through the farm was only forty strong-now as I sat there in the bathroom of an abandoned house staring out the window I could barely believe it.

There were so many walkers.

"Get down!" Daryl hissed. He grabbed the bottom of my shirt and pulled me down so that I fell on his lap. We both grunted when I fell down hard but there was never any uncomfortable awkwardness between me and Daryl no more. A few months ago as we squatted in what was left of a burnt down house T-Dog had called us a fine tuned machine of destruction. "How many?"

"Hundred and fifty head at least," I reported to him in a hushed whisper. "Maybe closer to two hundred. We need to get out of here and tell the others."

Daryl shook his head. "We'll wait till the herd blows through."

Daryl, ever the level headed bastard. He had a head on his shoulders that's for sure. When Carol had said that Rick had chosen his hands I sort of just went with it but in the past seven months he came to rely on us more and more to protect the group. We'd go out on scouting runs, often getting trapped by a herd and forced to hid for hours-perhaps days at a time, or we'd go on supply runs-we were forced to go further and further away from the group at all times. Spending so much time with Daryl made me see what Ebony had seen in him-he was something special all right.

I think it was safe to say we were pretty good friends.

"What if they catch them?" I asked Daryl. "They've got barely an ammo...I think we should aim for that town we saw on the sign a few days ago."

"Woodbury?" Daryl asked me. "It'd be a bust, PJ. They always are."

I sighed. I was tired, we all were tired. Tired of running and hiding, we needed a place to set down some roots instead of running around in circles escaping the giant herd that was now chasing us. The past winter had been hard on us, especially the children who were now just as armed as the adults were. Carl had become extremely proficient at using a small fire arm and Sophia was adept at using a hunting knife that she had found. I had argued with Rick over Jade being given a knife but he was adamant that everyone needed to be armed. He sprouted some shit at me about how his word was law and so obeyed.

Until Jade fell sick.

When my rabbit fell sick, just as she always did, I ignored Rick and made a run into Atlanta to search for antibiotics. Disobeying his orders had knocked me down a few notches on the totem pole considering I also lost them for a week when I returned. I found them later, hunkered down in a desolated, small town where Glenn almost mistook me for a walker. Rick berated me in front of the entire group. I told him I didn't care considering my rabbit was sick and when I shoved a bag of looted food in his face-literally-he laid off me. Rick had his own problems to contend with. The entire group was now aware that Lori had been sleeping with Shane and that the baby-which was growing fiercely every single day was Shane's. Rick barely even addressed Lori anymore except when he was issuing orders.

"You ok?" Daryl asked me, seeing the look on my face that he was now so familiar with. "You've got that little squinty thing going on-you get it when you're thinking about something."

I slid down beside him and put my head up against the crappy pink and white tiled wall. "Just tired is all," I told him. "Just tired."

The two of us sat there in total silence until nightfall and then we made a run for it. Easier to run from a heard in darkness but it doubles the risk of being caught and eaten alive. These days it was failure after failure after failure but we hadn't lost anyone yet.

When the two of us returned back to the car convoy the following morning, the beaten look me and Daryl wore told the group what they didn't want to hear.

"We've got no place to go," T-Dog announced as we gathered around the hood of the Tucson to take a look at the map Rick rolled out.

"When this herd meets up with this one, we'll be cut off, we'll never make it south," Maggie frowned, looking at the two red circles on the map.

"I got new for ya," Daryl cut in. "Herd's already about two hundred strong."

"This river could delay them," Herschel piped up. "If we move fast, we might have a shot to tear right through this."

"Yeah, but if this group joins up with that one, they could spill out this way," T-Dog argued with him, tapping the map.

"So we're blocked," Maggie sighed.

"Only thing to do is double back at 27th and swing towards Greenville," Rick sighed. He sounded defeated.

"We picked through that already," T-Dog argued. "It's like we spent the winter going in circles."

"Yeah, I know, I know," Rick nodded. "AT Newnan we'll push west. Haven't been through the area. We can't keep going house to house. I can't keep sending Daryl and PJ out on runs, we can't afford to be separated anymore. We need to find some place to hold up for a few weeks."

"Is it cool if we get to the creek before we head out?" T-Dog asked Rick. "It won't take long. We gotta fill up on water, we can boil it later."

"I'll keep watch," I told Rick. "Maybe you and Daryl can see if you can find any food or something."

Rick stared at me with those intense blue eyes. "Knock yourself out." He shrugged.

I headed down to the creek with an arrow notched in my bow, ready for any walkers to attack. T-Dog, Maggie, Glenn and Carol set to filling up the canteens full of water whilst I watched guard from a high advantaged point. Once we had enough water the group headed on back to the convoy. I stopped by Herschel's pickup and tapped on the window to catch Jade and Sophia's attention. "How's it hanging rabbit and dove?" I asked them.

Sophia shrugged. "Ok I guess."

Jade launched herself out the window to hug me. "I miss you Aunty Jay," she whispered in my ear. Her fifth birthday had come and gone-we had nothing to celebrate with. No cake but when she told me that she understood it almost broke my heart. Jade had started calling Daryl Uncle Daryl and Carol Aunty Carol. Sophia and Jade were as thick as thieves. It was cute.

"I miss you too, rabbit," I smiled.

"I miss mama," Jade whispered.

My face dropped and I hugged her back. "I miss her too."

At the sound of Daryl and Rick coming back from their little scout I could see the two men were grinning from ear to ear. "What did you find?" I asked them.

"Prison," Rick replied. "High walls, huge. Only problem is we've got walkers. If we clear out the outer yard we can spend the night and clear out the rest in the morning. PJ we'll need to use the rifle."

I put Jade back in the car and went to the back of the Jeep where I had a Remington Model 700 that T-Dog had found in the back of a destroyed cop car several weeks ago. Rick had suggested saving it for a special occasion since T-Dog had only found half a box full of .30 caliber rounds to go with it. I think that liberating a prison is a very special occasion.


	22. Chapter 22

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Two**

As Rick quickly and carefully cut through the outer fence of the prison the rest of us waited, alert and ready to fight off any attack. I felt somewhat naked without my bow but with the familiar feel of a sniper rifle in my hands it was easy to forget. Besides, Lori was keeping a hold of my bow for me. Once there was a big enough hole in the fence, one by one, we all piled in through leaving Glenn and Rick at the rear to seal it back shut from the walkers that were coming our way.

I looked over the prison yard with a grin on my face. "It's perfect."

"If we can shut that gate," Rick answered me, "prevent more from filling the yard, we can pick off these walkers. We'll take that field by tonight."

"So how do we shut the gate?" Herschel questioned.

"I'll do it," Glenn volunteered. "You guys cover me."

Maggie shook her head. "No. It's a suicide run."

"I am the fastest," Glenn argued.

"PJ?" Rick asked me. "What do you think? I can see that look on your face."

I surveyed what defences we had and threw a plan together. "Ok-Glenn, Magi, Beth-draw as many as you can get over there," I spoke to the group as a whole. "Get them through the fence. Lori, you stay with Jade and Sophia, keep the girls and the baby out of harm's way." Lori didn't like me giving her orders. "Daryl, you and me take Tower A. Carol, you've gotten to be a pretty good shot, you go with Herschel and Carl to Tower B."

Carl looked pretty stoked to be involved.

"I'll run for the gate," Rick finished.

Me and Daryl split off from the group as everyone went to their individual assignments. I glanced at Daryl when he opened the door for me. "What's that look for?" I asked him, seeing the bemused look on his face.

"You could at least look like you're not enjoying this," Daryl scolded me. "You've got the crazy look in your eyes like Merle used to get when he was enjoying something bad."

I laughed to myself as I jogged up to the top of the tower. Once we were outside, I set myself up on the balcony. However, out of years of habit and perhaps somewhat a little bit of ritual I started muttering the Hail Mary prayer-something I had picked up from my instructor. "Hail Mary, full of grace, the lord is with thee," I whispered. Every sniper has their own ritual that they do time and time again. I wasn't a religious woman-not by a long shot. It was just ritual after years of practice.

"What are you doing?" Daryl asked me.

I ignored him and stared down the scope. Nothing else mattered, not Daryl, not Rick, not anyone. I was like a horse with blinders on-only concentrating on what was in front of me. "Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus." I took a deep breath and fired my first shot, hitting a walker in the head right in front of Rick. "Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death." Taking my second shot I fired again, repeating the prayer over and over again.

Pretty soon I was out of ammo, sadly making the rifle completely useless. But by this time, Rick had completely cleared out the yard of walkers and closed the gate to the inner courtyard. "Nice shooting," I smirked at Daryl.

"You just gonna leave that there?" Daryl asked me, staring at the rifle.

"Until I find some ammo it's probably a good idea to leave it as a show of strength," I replied as we headed down to the others. "Plus, it's no good in close quarters."

We joined the others in the middle of the field where T-Dog was mimicking the winners of a Red-Sox game. Everyone was excited about the amount of space and not having to be on the run any more. It was a break, a much needed break for all of us, but the soldier in me wasn't happy with the situation.

I retrieved my bow from Lori and started off to do a perimeter check.

"Where you going?" Rick questioned as he came up behind me.

"Perimeter check," I told him. "I'm not too happy not knowing what's around me. Coming with me?" I asked him.

"Your mind kind of woman," Rick chuckled.

"Don't be flirting with me," I laughed, brushing off his comment.

"That was some fine shooting," he assured me as we walked along the fence line and down the hill, away from the group. There was an overturned bus that hid the group from the fence line-this was good in case anyone came along and wanted to claim this prison as their own. It was ours now. "I think I had begun to doubt you were even a sniper like you said until I saw you in action."

"You weren't so bad yourself," I laughed. "Listen-Rick, we haven't really spoken much since I went AWOL-"

Rick held his hand up to silence me. "PJ-your heart was in the right place-and you save Jade as well as going out on a limb to get some tablets for Lori to help her with her baby."

"Her baby?" I quoted. "Rick-God knows me and Lori don' get along but the baby will be your baby as well." I shook my head, "I know how you feel Rick-especially with the fact that she slept with your best friend and then said friend tried to kill you."

Rick raised an eyebrow. "You know, PJ, none of us actually know anything about you apart from the fact that you're a soldier and some stuff that Ebony told us."

I stopped at the fence as a walker approached us. "Nothing to tell Rick. I was a different person-who I was before is nothing compared to who I am now. What we have here, Rick Grimes, is some serious Mad Max shit." I stabbed the walker in the head with my hunting knife. "I am a true geek underneath this plucky warrior exterior."

"Mad Max?" Rick asked me.

"Mel Gibson? Mad Max the Road Warrior?" I laughed. "Seriously, that is a cult classic-Ebony got me hooked. God there was this one time that Jade was some sleep over birthday party when she was three-" I stopped. I hadn't spoken about Ebony in such depth since I'd let her hand go.

"I'm sorry PJ," Rick frowned. "I didn't mean to."

I cleared my throat and flicked away that one traitorous, rogue tear that escaped my eye. "That bus could be a good advantage point if ever we need it. One of us could man the tower and man the bus whilst another sentries the fence." I slung my bow over my shoulder, "shall we keep going?" I suggested.

"You don't like being alone with me," Rick pointed out. "Do you?"

"Come on Rick," I growled. "You know how I feel about you. Being alone with you is hard considering I like you. Now, if you'll excuse me I need to finish checking the fences."

Rick grabbed my arm and pulled me in to kiss him. I immediately dropped my bow and foolishly started kissing him back. What we have here is a married man…a married man with a wife who is carrying a baby belonging to another man.

What the hell am I doing?

I ignored the little voice in the back of my head and pulled us both down to the grass. After so long, the feeling of a man on top of you is the same whether the world is ending or you're just in a really shitty apartment after drinking too much. I opened my mouth to taste everything that Rick had to offer. If kisses could be divine I think this was it.

"HEY PJ!" we both heard Daryl shout off in the distance.

I wormed my way out from underneath Rick. "Second time Rick," I whispered. "There can't be a third." He grabbed a hold of my arm again and pulled me back in for another kiss. When we pulled away again I took the second tag off my dog tags and shoved it in Rick's hand. I jumped up and walked backwards.

"What's this for?" Rick frowned. The puzzled look on his face was really adorable in a sad kind of way.

"Keep it," I suggested. "You know how I feel Rick. And I think you feel the same." I headed around the side of the bus to find out what Daryl wanted and wondering if we hadn't been interrupted, how far would we have gone?


	23. Chapter 23

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Three**

I could have gone with the rest of the group to clear out the inner courtyard instead I chose to stay behind and keep an eye on the perimeter. There was two reasons for this. One I hadn't slept all night and was obviously tired according to Daryl and two because I wasn't in the right mind to go into a yard full of walkers. When Daryl and I debriefed with Rick this morning, I briefly saw my dog tag hanging on a chain around his neck-where Rick got the chain from I have no idea.

So I stayed in the guard tower and kept guard.

About an hour later, Lori made her way down to the tower to tell me that Rick and the others had cleared out Cell Block C and were heading deeper into the prison to so some recon. I came down and headed through the gate.

"Can I talk to you?" Lori asked me as we walked.

"About?" I inquired.

"Rick," she frowned. At the mention of his name, I could see how it pained her. It made me feel incredibly guilty about what was going on. "I'm not stupid, PJ. I can see the look he gives you when he sees you…he used to look at me like that you know?"

Jesus what did she want me to say? I didn't know what to say so I just kept my mouth shut. A part of me was yelling at me for breaking up a marriage whilst the other part did a good job at sneering at me, telling me that the marriage was already broken. I was conflicted. Conflicted does not go well in the field.

"Have you do anything with him?" Lori inquired. "I know I have no right to ask, seeing what I did with Shane but I thought he was dead." Lori was hanging on by a thread here and I could see that no matter what I said or didn't say was going to cut that thread.

"We just kissed," I told her. "Listen, Lori, I-"

Lori grabbed a hold of me and forced me to stop dead. "PJ, I think I lost the baby."

I froze. "Say again?" I shook my head. "You haven't felt it move?" I had no clue what this meant for the baby if it was infected but I did know that it would chew its way out of her. "Why are you telling me?" I asked her. "I'm no doctor. You should speak with Herschel."

"I want to speak to you," Lori argued. "I haven't felt the baby kick, I thought it was because I was exhausted and I haven't eaten properly in a long time."

I gripped Lori's arm tightly and dragged her towards the cell block.

"PJ wait!" Lori snapped, wrenching her arm from my hand. "I came to see you because I need a favour from you." She cleared her throat. "If the baby lives and I die during childbirth I want you to kill me."

I shook my head. "Lori-it's not going to happen."

"Why not?" Lori asked me. "How many women died in childbirth before modern medicine? If I come back, what if I attack it? Or Carl, or Rick or even you…If I do, if there is any chance, you put me down immediately, you do not hesitate." She choked back a sob. "Me, the baby…if we're walkers, you don't hesitate and you don't try to save us. Ok?" I sighed and nodded. "It might have been better if we never made it off the farm."

I snorted. "Says you-Lori. There's a lot we have to live for you know. This baby is another chance for you."

Lori shook her head. "My son can't stand me. And Rick-after what I put him through he turns to you-"

"For nothing," I told her. "We just kissed, Lori."

"I tried to talk to him but he pushed me aside. He hates me, he's too good a man to say it, but…I know him. I put him and Shane at odds, I put that knife in his hands." She shook her head. "PJ, you need to be the one that puts me down, and the baby down if we die. And you have to look after Rick. You need to pull him back to the proper path, he can't keep leading this group like he is otherwise everyone will die. Can you promise me that PJ?"

"I can't," I whispered.

"You have to," Lori answered.

"And if you both live?" I answered. "What then?"

Lori shook her head. "When I had Carl I had to have a C-Section. I'll need to have one with this baby. I know that."

"And Herschel?" I asked Lori. "Are you adamant that he can't save you? Or is it that you don't want to be saved?"

"Just promise me," Lori whispered.

I nodded. "Ok Lori, I promise. But I'm doing this for you-not for Rick or for me. For you." I held out my hand but Lori suddenly hugged me.

"I knew that underneath the exterior there was a human being," Lori assured me. "I see it when you attend to Jade."

"I used to be like that all the time," I told her. We started off towards the cells again. "Towards the end of my first tour something happened…something I don't want to talk about but it defined me. Made me who I am today."

"What was it?" Lori inquired.

I shook my head. "No, Lori. I'm not going to tell you. I don't need people to pity me or see me any differently. This is me now, just go with it. Ebony never even knew-it's not something I like to tell everyone." I turned back to her. "Lori-don't tell Rick."

"What would I tell him?" Lori asked me.

"He still loves you," I assured her. "You're the mother of his child. That sort of love doesn't go away overnight you know." What am I trying to tell her really? Here I am, the woman who comes in from the cold and starts messing around with her husband, albeit I haven't actually done anything yet. I should be the last person to try and convince Lori that her husband still loves her considering I'm the one who has feelings for a married man.

"How many times have you kissed him?" Lori suddenly asked me.

"Twice," I confessed. "Look-I'm sure you can understand how uncomfortable I feel discussing this. I deserve it, totally, but I don't feel right talking about your marriage."

"My marriage was over the moment I slept with Shane," Lori cried. "If my baby lives-I don't want my sins to carry over to it. You'll look after it, look after Carl and look after Rick. I still love Rick but that spark we had was long gone even before the world fell apart." She patted my shoulder and headed back into the cell block.

I eagerly followed, anxious to pick out where I was going to sleep.

"Aunty Jay!" Jade shouted from the top floor.

I glanced up and smiled when I saw her. Kid needed a haircut. "Do you have somewhere to sleep?" I asked her.

Jade nodded. "I'm sleeping with Sophia and Beth," she announced. "But I wanna sleep with you," she pouted.

I shook my head. "No baby girl. Aunty Jay is gonna sleep in the end cell alone so I have some leverage if something happens." I jogged up the stairs and ruffled her hair up, "you can come see me once I sort myself out and we'll give you a haircut. You and Sophia."

Jade's bottom lip dropped. "But I like my hair!" she cried.

"Can't afford to have it long baby girl," I smiled. "A walker could get you."

Carol stepped out of the cell behind the girls. "I still say you're good with the girls. Why didn't you have any of your own?"

"Long story," I whispered. "Involves a gun and a grenade and the scorching sun."

Carol wrinkled her nose up. "That sounds awful."

I laughed.

Yeah, it really did.

I threw my bag, my bow and my quiver on to the top bunk and lay down on the squeaky mattress. There was a lot to think about. Who would have ever thought the apocalypse could be so damn complicated?

Not me, that's for sure.


	24. Chapter 24

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Four**

I had just finished cutting Jade and Sophia's hair when I heard Rick shouting outside the cell block to let him in that something had happened to Herschel. My first immediate thought was of the girls, I shoved them in the back of the cell and closed the door despite their protests. I geared up and positioned myself as guard when Carl opened the cell block door. I watched in shock as Rick and Glenn wheeled Herschel in on a table missing the bottom part of his right leg. "What the hell happened?" I asked Daryl when he stood back.

"Herschel got bit and Rick cut his leg off," Daryl answered.

I shrugged. "Well that will do it." I notched an arrow in my bow and waited alert at the cell door whilst the others dealt with Rick. It wasn't long before both Daryl and I heard footsteps followed by five men dressed in prison gear come in through the front door. We raised our weapons. The look on their faces told me that they hadn't seen a woman in a long time and never expected to see one standing there aiming a bow at them wearing mini shorts and a faded black shirt with Doctor Who on the front.

"That's far enough," Daryl warned them.

"Cell block C," growled a man of Mexican background. "Cell four, that's mine, gringo. Let me in."

"Today's your lucky day, fellas," Daryl responded. "You've been pardoned by the state of Georgia, you're free to go."

I laughed. Daryl's a sassy motherfucker sometimes.

"What you got going on in there?" the Mexican asked us. "Who's the senorita?" he asked, flicking his gun in my direction.

"Ain't none of your concern," Daryl replied.

The Mexican growled at Daryl. "Don't be telling me what's my concern." He moved over to Daryl but I aimed high at his head.

"Best be watching where you aim that," I warned him. "I'm a bit trigger happy with this bow."

"Chill, man." A large African American man stepped up and looked at the Mexican. "Dude's leg is messed up. Besides, we're free now! Why are we still in here?"

"Man's got a point," Daryl shrugged.

"Yeah, and I gotta check on my old lady," a second African American argued with the Mexican who was obviously their leader.

"Group of civilians breaking into a prison you've got no business being in, got me thinking there ain't no place for us to go," he growled.

"Why don't you go find out?" Daryl suggested.

"Maybe we'll just be going now," piped up a small, mouse of a man with red hair.

"We ain't leaving," the Mexican declared.

"You ain't staying," T-Dog cut in. His gun was aimed at the Mexican, I was amazed at the balls on this one, aiming his gun whilst three off us were ready to kill him at a moment's notice.

"Hey this is my house!" the Mexican yelled. "My rules, I go where I damn well please!" He stepped forward and quick as a flash I was on him.

I smack him in the bottom of the chin with my bow and swung my leg out to knock his feet out from underneath him. "Stay down hermano or I put you down like the dog you are."

"There ain't nothing for you here," Daryl smirked. "Why don't you go back to your own sandbox?"

"Hey, hey, hey!" Rick shouted, coming down the stairs from attending Herschel. "Everyone relax, here's no need for this. PJ, let him up."

I stood back and let the Mexican get to his feet. "What's your name?" I asked him.

"Thomas," he growled at me. "How many of you in there?"

"Too many for you to handle," Rick replied.

"You guys rob a bank or something?" Thomas asked us. "Why don't you take him to a hospital?"

"How long have you guys been locked in that cafeteria?" Rick questioned.

Thomas stared at me. "Going on ten months. Any other women with you?"

"I will hurt you again," I warned him.

"Name's Big Tiny," the large African American introduced himself to me. "A riot broke out. Never seen anything like it."

"Name's Axel," spoke the red head. "It was like Attica on speed, man."

"Ever heard about dudes going cannibal, dying, coming back to life? Crazy," frowned a third African American who was a few years older than me argued.

"One guard looked out for us," Thomas told us. "Locked us up in the cafeteria, told us to sit tight, threw me this piece, said he'd be right back."

"And that was two hundred and ninety two days ago," Big Tiny finished. "We were thinking that the army or the national guard should be showing up any day now."

Rick shook his head. "There is no army," he informed them. "Short of PJ here."

"Marine," I winked. "Better than the army. Piss ass little sissies. Kicked their ass in any war games."

Rick shot me a look. "There's no government, no hospitals, no police, it's all gone," he continued.

"For real?" Axel questioned.

Rick nodded.

"What about my moms?" Big Tiny exclaimed.

"My kids? My old lady? Yo, you got a self-phone or something so we can call our families?" the second African American shouted.

"You dumb fuck!" I snapped. "There are no phones, no computers. Half the population has been wiped off the face of the planet. Most likely there is more people dead than there is living."

"Ain't no way," Thomas argued with me.

"Shall we show them the fence?" I asked Rick. "Maybe let them see a walker up close?"

Rick nodded in agreement.

The four of us escorted our new friends outside to the claimed prison courtyard that was littered with bodies.

"Good Lord, they're all dead!" Axel gasped, seeing the bodies or people he knew.

"Never thought I'd be so happy to see these fences," Thomas frowned. He took a deep breath of fresh air

"You never said," Big Tiny spoke. "How the hell did you get in here in the first place?"

"Cut a hole in that fence over there by the guard tower," Daryl pointed.

The five of them looked in the direction that Daryl was pointing in.

"That easy, huh?" Thomas asked.

"Where there's a will, there's a way," Daryl confessed.

Thomas snorted."Easy for you to say."

Big Tiny started poking one of the walkers with a stick. "So what is this like a disease?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "But we're all infected."

"What do you mean, infected?" Axel asked us. "Like AIDS or something?"

"If I was to kill you, shoot an arrow in your chest," Daryl explained. "You come back as one of these things. It's gonna happen to all of us."

"Ain't no way this Robin Hood cast's responsible for killing all these freaks," Thomas laughed. "Must be fifty bodies out here." He turned to Rick. "Where do you come from?

"Atlanta," Rick replied.

"Where you headed?" he continued to question.

Rick paused. "For now, nowhere."

"I guess you could take that area down there near the water," Thomas suggested, pointing towards the fence. "Should be comfortable."

"We're using that field for crops," Rick retorted.

"We'll help you move your gear out," Thomas continued.

"That won't be necessary," Rick informed him. "We took out these walkers, this prison is ours."

Thomas growled at him. "Slow down, cowboy. This is our prison. We were here first."

"Locked in the broom closet?" Rick argued. "We took it, set you free, it's ours, we spilled blood."

"We're moving back into our cell block," Thomas answered. The man was adamant that he and his crew were moving back into their cell.

"You'll have to get your own," Rick shrugged.

"It is mine!" Thomas shouted. "I've still got personal artefacts in there, that's about as mine as it gets!" He pulled his gun out but I kicked the back of his knee and forced him to his knees before holding an arrow to the jugular vein in his neck.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, maybe let's try to make this work out so everybody wins!" Axel pleaded. "There's no reason to hurt him, miss."

"I don't see a peaceful resolution to this," I told Rick. "The little bitch here won't go back to the cafeteria."

"There are other cell blocks," Axel agreed.

"You could leave," Daryl suggested. "Try your luck out on the road."

"We'll help you clear a cell block," Rick offered. "How stocked is that cafeteria? Must have plenty of food, five guys lasting almost a year?"

"It sure as hell don't look like anybody's been starving," Daryl smirked.

"There's only a little left," Thomas scowled. He gulped when I pressed my arrow deeper.

"We'll take half," Rick told him. "In exchange, we'll help clear out a cell block. You pay, we'll play. We'll clear out a block for you, then you keep to it."

Thomas nodded. "Alright."

Rick looked at me and I let Thomas get to his fee. "Well, let's be clear. If we see you out here, anywhere near our people, if I so much as even catch a whiff of your scent, I will kill you."

"Deal," Thomas agreed.


	25. Chapter 25

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters ++++++**

**Twenty-Five**

Once I was properly dressed and outfitted for close quarter's combat I made my way to the area just outside of Cell Block C where Rick had T-Dog handing out melee weapons to the prisoners. I nodded to Rick as I tied my quickly growing hair into a bun, making a mental note to myself to cut it short when we returned back to the cell block.

Thomas waved his crowbar around with a look of disgust on his face. "Why do I need this, when I've got a gun?"

"You don't fire guns," Daryl warned him. "Not unless your back's up against the wall. Oise attracts them, really riles them up."

"PJ, you got anything?" Rick questioned me. He looked over the table at me with just the slightest glint of admiration on his face. "You got a plan?"

"Could do," I answered. "We should go in two-by-two," I started. "Daryl will run point with T, you and me will bring up the rear," I told them, pointing at Rick. "We stay tight, hold formation, no matter how close the walkers get. Anyone breaks ranks, we could all go down, anyone runs off, they could get mistaken for a walker and end up with an arrow in the head."

"And that's where you aim," Daryl warned them. "These things only go down with a head shot."

Thomas snorted. "I don't need some skinny white bitch telling me how to take out a man."

Daryl and I glanced at each other. "You're the skinny white bitch," we both retorted at the same time.

"Enough," Rick growled. "As long as you remember to go for the brain and keep formation everything will go just fine."

We made our way to Cell Block D where we would be helping the prisoners clear out the block in return for the food they had given us. I wasn't entirely thrilled with the prospect of being neighbours with a group of men who posed a huge danger to us all but I wasn't the group leader. I kept an arrow notched in my bow the whole way, head flicking backwards and forwards like a meerkat on crack. This was just like being back in the middle of war, my squad having my back, escorting a group of civilians…

"Can you at least look like you're not enjoying this?" Rick whispered in my ear.

I smirked. "Is it that obvious?" I asked him. "Daryl said the same thing to me yesterday."

"Man, it's too damn dark in here," Big Tiny complained.

"You gotta hold it up in front of you," Daryl warned him, stopping to correct him in how to hold his weapon. "You're gonna hear 'em before you see 'em."

Just as those words left Daryl's mouth, the familiar guttural groaning sound that all walkers made hit our ears. Daryl put his hand to his mouth to warn the prisoners to be silent. The prisoners issued a charge before they ran passed T-Dog and Daryl straight at the walkers that came around the corner, the four of us watched them attack the walkers anywhere but the head. Daryl looked slightly bemused and Rick appeared like he didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"It's gotta be the brain!" Daryl shouted, shooting a walker in the head. "Not the stomach, not the heart, the brain!"

I fired an arrow at a walker near Axel. "Eyes open!" I ordered.

"I hear you," he grumbled.

One of the prisoners, who I hadn't had the pleasure of speaking with, stabbed a walker in the head as more started to arrive.

"Stay in tight formation!" Rick shouted. "No more prison riot crap!"

More walkers started coming around the corner towards us. Out the corner of my eye, I saw Big Tiny rush behind a wall to hide. Turning my attention back towards the fight I concentrated on the walkers, firing arrow after arrow until they were all down thanks mostly to our efforts, not theirs. As I collected the arrows I had loosened, I could see Rick and Thomas focused purely on Big Tiny who had a chunk of skin missing from his shoulder.

"Daryl, PJ, keep a look out," Rick ordered us.

Both Daryl and I went to watch for more walkers, I could hear them arguing over Big Tiny and his bite mark. I shoved all my arrows back in my quiver bar one that I notched in my bow. "I can watch if you wanna go back up Rick," I told him.

Daryl paused. "You're wasting your time," he grumbled at me. "Chasing after Rick. He's got Lori and Little Shane."

"It ain't like that," I argued back at him. "I don't need you lecturing me on the merits of feelings, Daryl Dixon." I kept my attention on the corridor but I could sense he was still there. "If it blows up it's only me it backfires on. And if it does you can be there to say I told you so as much as you want. Go back up Rick and T-Dog, I'll call you if I need you."

"Just holler if you need me," Daryl frowned.

I smirked. "Daryl, I think you'll find I'm quite the screamer." I chuckled as Daryl headed back towards Rick and T-Dog, muttering under his breath at something. After a moment of silence the group came passed me, their formation was all wrong, Daryl and Rick were talking in hushed tones behind the prisoners and Thomas was covered in blood. "Big Tiny?" I asked the boys.

They shook their head.

I followed in silence until we arrived at the entrance to Cell Block D. Daryl chucked the keys at Thomas who immediately dropped them on the floor.

"I ain't opening that," Thomas snapped.

Rick nodded. "Yes you are. If you want this cell block-you're gonna open that door. Just the one, not both of them. Because we need to control this."

Thomas picked the keys back up, pausing as we all heard the walkers behind the doors. "You bitches ready?" he asked, trying to open the doors. "I got this." The stupid fool wrenched open both door, allowing the walkers to pour right into our path.

I swung my bow around, connecting with the first walker that came at me before I stabbed it in the head. Loosing myself in the moment, I continued fighting my way through the walkers until it was just us once more. There was so much tension in the room that you could cut through it with a pocket knife. I hadn't seen what happened but when Rick stabbed Thomas in the head I didn't move to his defence. I closed my eyes and sighed, when I opened my eyes in time to see Rick give chase to one of the prisoners who had run away.

"Get down on your knees!" Daryl snapped, aiming his crossbow at Axel and Oscar.

"We don't have no affiliation to what just happened," Axel argued. "Tell him, Oscar."

"Stop talking, man," Oscar grumbled.

"Fubar," I mumbled under my breath.

"Fubar?" Daryl growled. "Do you hear the shit that comes out of your mouth?" he asked me.

"It means fucked up beyond all reason," I retorted. "It's military slang and it describes the situation perfectly."

Daryl rolled his eyes at me as Rick came back.

"PJ, go back to the cell block," Rick ordered. "I don't want the other's caught off guard, I need you there if something happens and they won't put Herschel down."

I nodded. I had no idea what Rick was going to do to either Axel and Oscar but I did know that whatever it was, Rick was doing it within good reason-it was to protect us. I could have done it-I could have killed them but Rick didn't want me to so I was just simply following the orders that were issued.


	26. Chapter 26

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Six**

Four days after making the prison our I had been doing the rounds when I found the body of a dead dog lying on the ground near the fence, just out of reach of the walkers. My first thought was to organise with Daryl on skinning and sorting out the dogs organs for food but the sound of three very hungry yelps caught my attention. The mother dog had been guarding three pups, at least three or four months in age, two were tan and white and both as fluffy as hell, whereas the third was pure white with one blue eyes, the other damaged beyond repair.

Being a vet, Herschel checked them over and gave them a clean bill of health. Rick said it was pointless keeping young pups around but even Lori said it would be good for the kids to have a little normalcy in life. Sophia and Jade both immediately took a liking to the two tans girls, naming them Fluffy and Ollie respectively. The white pup with the one eye followed me around like a lost duckling, I wanted to give him to Carl but each time the boy approached him, the pup would bite him. Eventually Carl gave up and handed him back to me. Now I had a pup following me with a black bandana wrapped around his neck and answering to the name Spirit.

Things were starting to look up for all of us, we should be able to start planting crops soon. It was coming up sunny for us. Finally, the break we needed. But in this world, all I could think of was how peace never lasted.

I would curse myself for being right.

Spirit and I had gone out to the courtyard to start working on some basic puppy training when the shit hit the fan.

I glanced up to see Herschel on a pair of crutches, making his way across the courtyard with Beth and Carl assisting him. Everyone looked happy, I even saw Rick and Lori exchange a glance. This love triangle was very complicated.

Suddenly, Carl shouted out in a panic just in time for all of us to see a herd of walkers coming up behind him. I grabbed Spirit and shoved him inside the bottom of the tower before setting about taking out the walkers that were advancing on us. I could hear Rick shouting as the small group of us defended each other from walker attack. Lori, Carl and I were the only ones that were significantly armed, Maggie had a knife but her focus was purely on getting her father to safety.

I ushered Carl and Lori towards me. "Head inside the prison!" I shouted to Carl. "Focus on your mum and the baby before yourself. Carl ran into the prison first followed by Lori and I came in last, slamming the doors closed behind us. He started leading us towards the cell block only to be cut off by more walkers.

"GO!" I shouted to Carl. "I'll follow up the rear!"

Carl took us through another series of doors, heading deeper into the prison. In my mind, I found myself going over the weaknesses in the prison walls, trying to figure out how the walkers had gotten in in such large numbers. I slammed the door closed behind us, shutting the walkers off from killing us.

But I had no idea where we were.

As we continued on in the darkness with me now leading and Carl bringing up the rear I could hear Lori huffing and puffing behind us. She sounded like she was in a lot of pain. I turned around to see Lori leaning up against the wall breathing heavily. "Can you keep up?" I asked her.

Lori shook her head. "Something's not right…"

"Did you bit?" Carl asked his mother.

Lori shook her head again. "I think the baby's coming."

"Now!" I gasped. "Jesus, Lori, could you have any worst timing kiddo?"

"Mum?" Carl whispered. The horror was written all over his face.

"We need to find somewhere safe!" I shouted at Carl, seeing more walkers off to our right. I wrapped my arm around Lori's waist, "come on mama."

Carl ran ahead of us, looking for a room or something to keep us safe and away from any more unpleasant surprises. Finally, the little soldier found us a room, it was small but easily defendable. He slammed the door shut as I leant Lori up against a wall. "Is she gonna be ok?"

I paused. "Carl, buddy, I'm a soldier, not a nurse."

"We have to get Herschel!" Carl argued.

I shook my head. "We can't risk getting caught out there," I told him. I met Lori's gaze and she nodded weakly at me. "You're gonna need to give birth to this baby here." I gripped her hand tightly, "let's get these pants off."

Lori nodded.

I looked to Carl. "You're gonna need to help deliver your baby brother or sister, you up for it? Between the two of us we should have some idea."

Carl nodded. "Do you know how?"

I shook my head. "Does watching _One Born Every Minute_ count?" I laughed nervously.

"I got push," Lori gasped.

"Ok," I nodded. "I believe you."

Lori started to try and push, the only thing she seemed to be doing was causing herself more pain. She screamed in pain but underneath that I could hear a faint dripping sound. When I looked at the ground I could see blood.

"Lori stop!" I yelled. "Something's wrong. You're bleeding!" Instead of the normal happiness that all mothers are meant to have I could see only fear on Lori's face when I lay her down on the floor. "I have no fucking idea what to do!" I cursed.

"I'm not losing this baby!" Lori warned me, in between the pain that wracked her body. "You've gotta cut me open."

"Fubar," I snorted. "I am not cutting you open, Lori. You'll die."

"You don't have a choice!" she cried.

"I'll go for help!" Carl informed me.

Lori grabbed her sons had. "NO! Carl, I need you to stay!" She turned back to me, "my baby has to survive…please…" she started breathing heavily, "my baby…for all of us…please, Philomena, please…"

I paused and wrinkled my face up. Could this day get any worse? Really? I pulled my hunting knife out of my boot and rolled Lori's shirt up. "This is old," I pointed out. "From when you had Carl?"

Lori nodded. "Carl?" she called out.

"I'm here, mum," he answered.

"Baby," Lori started, "I don't want you to be scared, ok? This is what I want. This is right. Now you…you take care of your daddy for me, all right? And your little brother or sister, you take care…"

"You don't have to do this!" Carl cried.

"You're gonna be fine…" she assured him. "You are gonna beat this world, I know you will. You are smart, and you are strong, and you are so brave! And I love you."

I looked away as tears started rolling down my face.

"I love you too," Carl sobbed.

"You gotta do what's right, baby," Lori continued. "You promise me, you'll always do what's right. It's so easy to do the wrong thing in this world." Lori started to cry. "So don't…so if it feels wrong, don't do it, all right? If it feels easy don't do it. Don't let the world spoil you. You're so good! You're my sweet boy! The best thing I ever did! I love you! I love you. You're my sweet, sweet boy, I love you. Okay…okay, now." Lori nodded at me as I wiped the tears away. "Okay…Philomena…when this is over, you're gonna have to…"

I shook my head.

"No, you have to do it, it can't be Rick!" Lori cried. "It can't be Rick, you have to do it…you look after him, PJ, you love him and you look after him. Carl and the baby will need you as well. You love them like they're your own." She took a deep breath. "Alright, alright, it's alright. It's alright…Goodnight, love."

"I'm sorry," I whispered just before I started cutting. Lori scream out in pain and warm blood poured over my hands. "Carl, give me your jacket," I whispered, focusing on the baby more than the body I was now cutting into. I hear Lori's head hit the ground under her but kept my attention on the baby. "Carl, give me your hands." Carl stared at me, he looked more like a child now then ever. "Carl, please." Keep the site clean, okay? I cut too deep, I'm gonna cut the baby. Okay… Okay, come on, I see it, I see the ears. I'm gonna pull him out. I can't tell if this is the arm or the leg. Okay, I'm gonna pull the baby out."

He nodded and the two of us worked on saving the baby even though neither of us knew what on earth to do. Eventually I managed to pull the baby free and started cleaning its face. I'd seen them cleaning the baby's airways on_ One Born Every Minute_ by cleaning their mouths and rubbing their backs. I was pretty sure that it wasn't going to work then the baby started to cry. I sat it down on Carl's jacket and wrapped the baby up.

It was a girl.

"We have to go," I whispered to Carl, ignoring the feel of the blood that now covered my arms and hands.

"We can't just leave her!" Carl objected. "She'll turn." He drew his gun. "She's my mum…"

I nodded and held the baby against my chest before retreating to the door. There were no walker's in the halls but they would come soon when they heard the gunshot. No sooner was I outside the room did I hear the shot echo off the walls and down the hall. I didn't feel like a tough soldier any more…right now I was just as helpless as Jade or Sophia or even this baby…

Carl came out of the room moments later, he pulled Rick's sheriffs hat onto his head and confidently held his gun even though his whole body was shaking. We made it to back to the courtyard with only a few walkers in between us, Carl took care of them, clearing the way for me and his sister to come through unharmed. To me, Carl was older than any of us right now.

When we came into the daylight, I held my hand up over my eyes to block out the sunlight and the baby in my arms started to cry. The group in the courtyard turned to face us, they appeared to be gearing up for a search party. Well, here we are, I thought, not actually being able to say it.

Finally I locked eyes with Rick and in a single glance he knew what had happened.

"Where…where is she?" Rick whispered. There was horror in his voice, horror, sadness and emptiness.

Rick came towards me but I shook my head. "No, Rick…don't." As the tears rolled down my face, so did they start in Rick and pretty much every one of us.

"Oh no…" Rick sobbed, glancing at Carl. "NO! NO!"

I choked back a sob and buried my face into Carl's jacket as Rick's whole world shattered into a million pieces.


	27. Chapter 27

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Seven**

As soon as I could I handed the baby over to Carl and knelt down in front of Rick. The best way to describe what Rick was experience had to be shock, he was completely out of it. Daryl waved his hand in front of Rick to try and catch his attention but neither of us were having any luck.

"Let me see the baby," Herschel asked, standing beside Beth as best he could. Beth was holding Spirit in her arms, when she put him on the ground, the pup came running over to lean up against me.

"What are we gonna feed it?" Daryl asked, marching towards Herschel whilst Carl held the baby. "We got anything a baby can eat?"

"It's a girl," I informed Herschel when he started going over the baby.

"Good news is she looks healthy," he confirmed, relieving us all of a considerable amount of stress. "But she needs formula, and soon, or she won't survive."

Daryl shook his head. "Nope. No way. Not her, we ain't losing nobody else," he growled, pulling his crossbow over his shoulder. "I'm going for a run. PJ, you're with me. We need both of us out there."

I nodded. "Yeah, sure." Looking around I suddenly realised that there were two people missing. Carol and T-Dog. Sophia and Jade were clinging to Beth but Carol and T-Dog were gone. Lori…Carol…and T-Dog…three people who deserved to live more than anyone and they're gone…now isn't the time to cry, I told myself, the baby needs us.

"I'll go," Maggie volunteered. "Six hands are better than four."

"Ok," Daryl nodded. "Glenn stay here and work on clean up. Get the fence. Too many pile up, we got ourselves a problem." He nodded. "Think where we're going. Beth?" He pulled Beth over to the side as I collected my arrows from the dead walkers that littered the courtyard. Moments later he started shouting out more orders.

I wrenched the last arrow out of a walker when Rick snatched a fallen axe up off the ground and started up the stairs. "Rick!" I shouted after him. He ignored me and vanished inside the prison. "Daryl-"

"I need you to have my back," Daryl whispered in my ear. "This baby needs us. We have to get formula and there is no one I trust more than you to have my back. You with me?"

I hesitated and nodded. "Always," I nodded.

"Get the gate!" Daryl shouted, heading off. "Come on, we're gonna lose the light!"

"You know where you're going?" Glenn asked us as he followed us to the Jeep. "There's a Piggly Wiggly at 85."

"The baby section's been cleared," Maggie cut in. "Lori asked me to keep an eye out, I haven't had much luck."

"Is there any place that hasn't been completely looted?" Daryl asked us.

Glenn paused. "We saw signs for a shopping centre just north of here."

Maggie shook her head. "Yeah, but there's too much debris on the road. A car will never get through that."

"I can take one of you," Daryl spoke up, pulling that leather vest on of his with the angel wings on the back.

"I'm going," I growled before Maggie could. "I can't be here right now. Plus, I know what she needs from looking after Jade when she was a baby." I left the Jeep ad made my way over to Daryl's Harley, ignoring the familiar purr of the engine starting up. Glenn tossed a backpack my way and I slung it over one shoulder as I got on behind Daryl. He didn't seem the least bit phased by the fact that I was covered in blood.

We drove for a couple of hours, stopping only to see what supplies were left in what cars along the way. We managed to find a couple packets of pumpkin seeds-you know the kind that people eat-and stashed them in the backpack hoping that we could plant them. Eventually we came to a stop in the back yard of a children's day care centre that was covered in overgrown weeds. I notched an arrow in my bow once both of us got off the Harley.

"Company's close," Daryl whispered. "We stay tight."

"Like you even need to tell me," I reminded him. "Remember who save your ass when that walker pulled you in the swimming pool?"

"You say that like you've never had someone had to come in and save your ass before," Daryl shot back.

"I have," I frowned. "Daryl, I wasn't always a hard ass bitch. In fact…I was pretty fun once upon a time. I suppose you could think I was like Ebony in a way. Bright, bubbly and always full of fun."

"What happened?" Daryl inquired as the two of us headed into the day care.

"Got caught with a couple others in my squad," I started to tell him. Smashing the window open I continued to speak. "Towards the end of my first tour. We were tortured for information-the enemy wanted to know troop movements, supply routes, passcodes-the works but none of us would budge." I climbed in through the open window, pausing only when I saw the cots lines up against the wall.

Daryl followed.

"There was me and another girl in the squad, Mary King-she was as tough as nails," I continued. "We got singled out by some of the more aggressive insurgents and well…stuff happened…" It was stuck in the back of my throat like a bad taste, I couldn't get it out. "It changes a person, you know?" I turned back to Daryl, "that sort of violation changes a person…Mary killed herself, left the base hospital in the middle of the night and walked out in a mine field. Boom-she was gone."

"And you?" Daryl asked me, pity written all over his face.

"Sometimes I wish I had died," I answered. "It makes relationships hard…I never told Ebony, you know? She was dealing with Jade's father and the abuse he dished out on her…I could never tell her because there is one thing in this world that I hate more than anything and that is pity. I can't stand it. What happened doesn't make me a glass flower-it strengthened my resolve."

Daryl was silent.

"You're the first person beside my commander who knows," I whispered. "Jesus…I never even told my family," I thought. Suddenly, without warning, Daryl hugged me. It was awkward and weird but the fact that he was hugging me to make me feel better gave me a little faith back in the human race.

I broke off the hug and silently went to checking cupboards for anything that a baby could use from bottles, to formula, washable nappies, to clothes and even some of that nappy rash cream. "If you can find some clothes in the lost and found for the kids that would be great," I suggested to Daryl. "Check the kid's locker room-that's where I was always finding Jade's stuff when she lost it." Continuing on I went from room to room, searching and taking what I could priorities before a loud, clunking sound drew Daryl and myself back to the office. The closer we got, the more it sounded like something was eating something else. Daryl opened the office door and carefully proceeded to open the built in wall cupboard. It was then I found myself unable to take Daryl Dixon serious anymore seeing him holding a doll in his hands as well as his crossbow...even when he shot the possum that was hiding in the cupboard.

"Dinner!" he exclaimed like a child.

"You're such a redneck," I groaned. "That ain't going in the bag," I warned him, a grin plastered over my face despite the blood that was still on my hands.


	28. Chapter 28

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Eight**

It was nightfall by the time Daryl and I made it back to the prison. We had enough baby tuff to keep the baby going for a couple weeks until we could go out and find some more. The baby was crying when we got back to the cell block, Carl was doing his best to stop her from crying but she was hungry as hell and had a set of lungs on her.

Jade ran over to me and latched straight onto my leg as I tried to walk my way over to Carl.

"How's she doing?" Daryl frowned, using that same voice that he used when he attended to Sophia and Jade. I emptied the bag of supplies as Daryl took the baby from Carl. It was certainly a weird picturing seeing Daryl with the baby.

"Aunty Jay," Jade whispered, tugging on my shirt.

"Yeah rabbit?" I asked as Beth helped me sort out the bottle.

"Are you and Uncle Daryl gonna get married now?" she asked me.

I burst out laughing and Daryl turned all different shades of red. "What?" I laughed. "Jade, why on earth would you think that? The baby isn't ours, its Rick and Lori's." Beth took the bottle off me and ran it over to Daryl, the girl couldn't look the two of us in the eye after what Jade had said.

"But Lori isn't here," Jade pouted, "and you're looking after the baby. You and Uncle Daryl are always together. Mummy's and daddy's should be married."

I sighed.

Oh dear.

"She got a name yet?" Daryl questioned once he had her sorted and taking her formula.

Carl shook his head. "Not yet. I was thinking maybe Carol," he started, rattling off names. "…or Andrea, Amy, Jacqui, Patricia, Ebony…or Lori. I dunno."

Daryl paused whilst he watched Carl than turned back to the baby. "Do you like that?" he asked her. "Little Ass Kicker."

I kissed Jade on the head and fixed the strap on my quiver before heading for the cell block door.

"Where are you going?" Glenn asked me in a hushed whisper.

"After Rick," I replied.

"You don't even know where he'll be," Glenn argued.

"I know," I nodded. "He's heading to where Carl and I left Lori's body." I turned, "don't you open this door for nothing."

Glenn nodded. "I know the rules PJ."

"Whilst I'm gone I want you and Maggie to search the armoury and see if you can find me some .30 calibre rounds for the Remington," I told him. "And organise a car, the three of us are going to go on a supply run, we need more food and clothes for the baby as well as Jade and Sophia. We need some dog food for the dogs and if we can find it we should start stocking up on baby food in the tins. I'm hoping no one has swept through that place on 74 that was full of walkers. Can you do that?"

Glenn nodded. "Sure," he answered. "I'll let Daryl know."

"Thanks, G," I smiled. I slipped out the cell block door and just simply followed the bodies. There wasn't a live walker anywhere in the prison. When I finally found the room where Carl and I had left Lori, there was a large bloodstain on the floor and a dead walker with a bloated stomach, its face was absolutely shredded to bits-most likely by a knife. Rick had been here, of that I was one hundred percent sure. I knelt down and cut open the walker's stomach, sorting through the pieces of human flesh until I found what I was looking for.

A gold wedding ring.

I cleaned it off as best I could before I stuck in in my pocket and got to my feet to continue with the search. Carl needed his father, and the unnamed baby needed him as well…I needed him…Rick, despite the challenges that we've all faced in the past seven months, had kept this group together and alive. It was about time for someone to do the same for him. When I came around the corner I stopped dead in my tracks, Rick was standing in front of a work bench littered with tools, holding a phone against his ear and was talking to someone on the other end.

That was completely impossible.

I came up behind him and snatched the phone off him as gently as I could.

Rick spun around holding and axe out, he swung it at me and just missed me by a couple of centimetres.

"Jesus Rick!" I snapped, grabbing the axe off him. "You could have killed me!"

"What are you doing her PJ?" Rick growled.

"Looking for you," I answered. "The baby needs you, Carl needs you. They've both just lost their mother. I've gotta get you back."

"I have to find Lori," Rick argued.

I sighed and dug the ring out of my pocket. "Rick-" I held it up and waited for it to register. "I found it in the walker you killed…we have to get back Rick."

Rick snatched the ring from my hands. "PJ you need to go…"

"Why?" I asked him. "I have to bring you back."

He grabbed my arms and started roughly pushing me away. He was shouting at me, yelling and screaming, some words I could pick out, others I couldn't. Rick slammed me up against the wall near the walker, knocking the bow out of my hand. "YOU'RE NOT LORI!" he screamed in my face. He wrenched my tag from around his neck and threw it at me. "GET OUT OF HERE! GET OUT!"

I stared at him. "Ok…that was just the wake-up call I needed. Thank you, Rick." I picked my bow up off the floor and walked backwards towards the door. "Carl and the baby need you. She doesn't even have a fucking name yet. The rest of us will take care of them until you can get your shit together. We need you." I wrenched open the door and killed the walker that was in the hallway before I slammed it shut and started on my way back to the cell block.

"Where's Rick?" Herschel inquired when Beth let me in. "You've only been gone an hour, did you find him?"

"Rick didn't want to come back," I answered. "He's armed and almost took my head off. Maggie and Glenn?" I asked, changing the subject.

"They found the supplies you wanted," the old man answered.

I headed up the stairs towards my cell and stuck my head over the side rail. "Daryl? Was he ok with us going on a run?"

Herschel nodded. "If I give you a list of things can you have a look out for them?"

"Sure," I nodded. "I'm gonna get some shut eye, if anyone needs me I'm sleeping." Spirit was sitting on my bed curled up and sleeping. I unstrapped all my weapons and lay down on my bed to listen to the sound of Sophia crying in her sleep and the baby grizzling for more food or possibly a diaper change.

Who am I kidding?

There's no rest for the wicked.


	29. Chapter 29

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Twenty-Nine**

The following morning, Glenn, Maggie and I left the prison in the Jeep and made our way to the shopping centre on 74. It wasn't a very big place and there wasn't a descent vantage point for me and the Remington but when we arrived I set up on the building opposite the shopping centre.

Rick had come back to the group that morning before we left. He looked ok but I continued cleaning the Remington, habit before I went on a mission, and ignored him. He started to come over and talk with me but Herschel called him over. Herschel is a good judge of character, he could tell I was peeved at Rick so he cut him off. As we were about to go, Rick and Axel opened the gate, when I drove through I saw that Rick was wearing my tag again but he was also wearing Lori's wedding ring. No, I was done with this love crap.

About an hour after we arrived, I was looking through the scope searching my line of site for anyone or anything when I saw both Maggie and Glenn coming out the back of the store. Unfortunately for them I also saw a man coming from the south. I took aim through the scope and watched the man approach the two, I would have shot him if only Glenn hadn't greeted him like he knew him.

I wish I could read lips.

In the distance I could spot a walker but the son of bitch was too far away to be of any danger. When the man grabbed Maggie around the neck and held a gun to her head I realised that I should have followed my first instinct. I should have shot the bastard. The man forced Glenn and Maggie towards the Jeep and shouted at them.

Damn it, I snapped. I grabbed the Remington and made for the building's fire escape. As they drove past in me, Glenn saw me but continued on driving in the general direction of that town Woodbury that Daryl and I had talked about a few days ago.

What the fuck was I supposed to do now? I looked around the area for a mode of transport. There was nothing around so I took off running down the road, eventually breaking off into the forest surround the road that lead to a seemingly deserted town with the sign Woodbury out the front. To the untrained eye it would have seemed deserted but I noticed that the cars and certain other things had been put there as vantage points. Soon enough my suspicions were answered. I found a large wall around the town complete with sentries on the walls.

I ducked inside one of the abandoned buildings and hid the Remington behind the counter along with the bullets. Slipping out the back of the store, I snuck towards the wall, using anything I could as cover.

Then I heard voices.

Familiar voices.

I stuck my head outside the bus I was hiding behind to look at who was talking and I froze. Seeing them standing there with their identical chestnut brown spiky hair, the same stubborn jaw line, the same five foot nine inches of height and those dark brown, almost black eyes were my older brothers Michael and Matthew.

The twins were alive!

"Robur! Calculo!" barked a third familiar voice. Behind the twins I watched in a mixture of horror and delight as my parents first born son, John Lucas, walked over to them, a rifle strung casually over his shoulder. Bloody hell it was spooky how similar my brothers all looked. The only difference was John's military style buzz cut and the twins spiky hair. "The Governor wants to see us! Merle's brought in two prisoners from the outside."

"We're busy, Rex," Michael replied. "Milton asked us to collect some specimens for his research."

"Well the Governor supersedes, Milton," John snapped, clenching his fist. "Merle heard 'em talking about some kind of prison. If we could get our hands on another place we could have a real set up."

"The inhabitants?" Matthew questioned as they started to walk away from my hiding place.

"We kill them all," John answered so coldly. "There's an Asian kid and a woman so the bet is on who will break first. The Governor wants us to get that location out of them by any means."

I notched an arrow in my bow and spun out from around the bus, taking aim carefully and firing straight at the walker that was coming around the corner. "I thought you were seasoned soldiers," I frowned, notching a second arrow.

The three of them turned to me, rifles aimed. Matthew was the first to lower his. "Phil?" he gasped. "Oh my god, you're alive?"

"Are you alone?" John asked me.

"I had a friend but she died, I lost her daughter as well and the group I was with," I lied. "I lost them when we got split by a herd. Been on the run from said herd that's at least two hundred head for months. Lost them a few days ago on the 85." Looking around I put on my best frown. "What is this place?"

John paused. "Put your bow away, Velox, we're not your enemies. I have something inside you might like to see. But first, the Governor would be better off to meet you first."

I strung my bow over my shoulder and followed my brothers inside the town, making a mental note of any escape points. "I thought you were on loan to MI6," I spoke up, making small talk with John.

"I came back," he replied. "When we received word of total wildfire being declared, the prime minister saw that I was sent back to America. Yourself?"

"I was making my way to the farm," I answered.

"So were we," Matthew grinned. "Managed to get taken in by the Governor and John came along six weeks later. Man I had faith that we'd all be together one day."

"Theo, Kevin and Jacob are in Iran," John spoke up. "I would hardly call that together."

A man wearing a light blue shirt with a black vest over the top, denim jeans and boots approached the four of us with the same look that John always had on his face. Cold and calculating. "John, what's this?" he frowned. This man had to be the Governor.

"Philip, this is my baby sister, Philomena Jocelyn Lucas," John replied. "She took down a biter."

I shrugged. "I call 'em walkers but whatever."

The Governor looked at John. "The others call them walkers." He turned to me, "where did you come from?" he asked me.

"Wilderness," I answered. "Been on my own for a while, lost my group when we got split by a herd, killed my best friend, I tend to stick to myself these days."

He paused and went to speak when someone shouted out to John.

Today was a day of surprises.

My jaw dropped and every fibre of my being screamed out in joy. "Fuck me sideways," I whispered when the person who owned the shout came over to John. I could barely believe what I was seeing. "Ebony?" I whispered. I stepped towards my frozen friend once, twice, three times until I was right in her face…

…and the first thing she did was slap me.

"You killed my daughter!" she yelled in my face.

I shook my head. "What are you talking about? Eb's…oh my god…you're alive…."

She slapped me again and went to slap me a third time before John wrapped his arm around her waist then pulled her away from me. "YOU PROMISED YOU WOULD KEEP HER SAFE!"

"SHE'S ALIVE!" I roared right back at her. "SHE'S ALIVE AND THESE FUCKS PLAN ON KILLING HER AND EVERYONE ELSE IN OUR PRISON WHEN THEY GET THE LOCATION OUT OF MAGGIE AND GLENN!"

Ebony stopped struggling against John. "Jade's alive?" she whispered. She looked at John, "you said she was dead."

I glared at my brother. "One thing you need to know about John Gabriel Lucas is that he's a manipulative bastard who will use your loved ones against you." I went to turn around but something hit me in the back of the head…

The last thing I remembered was Ebony shouting out my name.

I couldn't help but smile…Ebony was alive…


	30. Chapter 30

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty**

When I came to I was expecting to be in some kind of cell or walker bait or possibly even both instead I was lying in a bed with Ebony sitting across from me. She was staring at me most intently with my bow sitting on her lap and the quiver with all my blades sitting on the table. I sat up slowly whilst at the same time John came into the room, he leant against the back of Ebony's chair with all the possessiveness of an alpha male on any documentary about animals I'd ever seen.

"Careful," Ebony frowned, "Martinez is a little jumpy at the best of times." She shifted in her seat, "the Governor wanted to put you in one of the cells but I thought it would be easier to talk here in s friendly environment."

I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, feeling like I'd just been out on a night of drinking without the fun. Rubbing my head I looked at John. "Lucas, Philomena, J, Corporal, 957289."

Ebony frowned. "PJ-what are you doing?"

"Name, rank and serial number," John answered. "It's what soldiers give the enemy when they're captured."

Ebony looked confused. "We're not your enemy, PJ."

I glared at her. "I heard John say they were going to kill the inhabitants of the prison. They're going to kill Herschel, Beth, Daryl, Carl, Rick, Sophia, Axel, Jade, and Lori's baby," I informed her, listing the people in the prison. "As far as I'm concerned, everyone here is the enemy. They've got Maggie and Glenn. Lucas, Philomena, J, Corporal, 957286."

Ebony leant forward. "PJ-you're my best friend-tell me where my daughter is."

I shook my head. "No." I folded my arms. "You best be chucking me in a cell with Glenn and Maggie because I will tell you nothing short of name, rank and serial number so go to hell, Ebony." I studied my face in a reflective surface and winced at the bruise developing on my face.

Ebony slapped me again, right on top of my already forming bruise. "You don't get to play the defiant bitch, PJ. Where is my daughter?!" she roared.

John leant forward and stroked Ebony's hair. "You know, babe, whatever you do with my little sister here is nothing. That why I had the Governor leave her here with us, she's been tortured, beaten, starved…raped…and she doesn't break."

Ebony stared at me. "What…? PJ…when did this happen?" she whispered.

"Go jump in a lake full of walkers," I snapped at her. "I'm not telling you where the prison is so do what you want with me." I got off the bed and went over to the window to stare at the town below. There was people walking around without a worry in the world. They were all clean, happy, nothing seemed to worry them-they were safe. "There is nothing that will make me talk. I'm a soldier. But I'm also looking out for the children in our midst." I turned around and faced both Ebony and John. "You two can play happy deranged families all you like but I lived on the road with these people for almost eight months. I did a run into Atlanta to get medicine for Jade when she was sick. I took care of her, Daryl took care of her. I'm not giving it up!"

I lashed out at John and managed to push him straight into the lounge, he tripped over the lounge and slammed his head on the coffee table that was right behind him. I stopped only to check his pulse then snatched my bow off the bed and slung it over my shoulder before heading to the table that was holding my supplies. It was hard to say if I should speak to Ebony-was she putting on an act or was she really under my brother's thumb? I hoped to god that it was an act. Once I was ready, I turned to face Ebony who had every chance to aim a gun at me but she didn't. "You playing?" I asked her.

Ebony rushed at me and threw her arms around me. "Oh my god you're alive!" she cried. "How's my baby? Is she ok? Is she alive? Is she eating well? PJ tell me!"

I studied her face. "What the hell?" I asked her. "One moment you're all crazy lady and the next moment you're hugging me…I don't get it."

"They told me she was dead," Ebony whispered. "John…John and the Governor…they said that they found her body…described her even down to the little butterfly necklace you gave her last year."

"Babe…" I whispered, "Jade lost that months ago…she's been wearing your grandmother's fire opal necklace." I looked down at John was lay motionless on the floor. "You're a great big bag of dicks, asshole." Turning back to her I realised that I had to ask. "How did you get out of the herd? I am so sorry…the herd was going to tip the jeep."

Ebony shrugged. "I crawled out from underneath the herd, there were too many grabbing at me-at each other." She walked over to the door and stuck her head out, "I walked for days…dazed…running from walkers…than John found me…He and Merle brought me here-I've been here for months PJ…I was so angry for such a long time after they told me the Governor had found Jade's body."

"She's at the prison," I whispered. "Pack some stuff, we're leaving. After we get Glenn and Maggie."

Ebony shut the door again and started getting some clothes together. As she did that, I stripped the weapons off my brother and tied him to the radiator. "How on earth did you hook up with my brother? I mean Matthew or Michael I get but John?"

She shook her head as she stuffed the last of her clothes in a backpack. "He gave me stability, looked after me-"

"He broke my arm when I was five by twisted it around until it snapped," I cut her off. I paused for a moment. "Listen-Ebony…Rick…if you're leading us on to help the Governor he will kill you. These past months have been hard on all of us. Him the most, he's sort of the unquestioned leader."

Ebony shook her head. "I promise-I promise on Jade."

That was good enough for me.

I opened the door and looked around for anyone coming up the hallway. "All clear," I smiled at Ebony before ushering her out. Just as we reached the bottom of the stairs we found the way blocked by Matthew.

He studied the two of us the spoke. "You're friends are being taken to the warehouse, this way," Matthew pointed back up the hallway. He tossed Ebony an assault rifle, "remember how to use that?"

Ebony flicked the safety off and pulled the magazine out to check the clip was full. She slammed it back in and looked through the scope. "Like a bicycle," she answered.

"You're gonna help us?" I questioned.

"You're my baby sister," Matthew replied. "I'm always gonna help you."

The three of us came out the back of the building and down the fire escape. Once we hit the ground Matthew took charge and led us off towards the warehouse. We had almost gotten there when the familiar smell of smoke wafted into us. "Smoke grenade," I whispered to Matthew.

Matthew signalled to me and we crouched the closer we got to the warehouse. When the doors bust open, the three of us took aim but found ourselves aiming at Rick, Glenn, Maggie and Daryl.

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank god!"

Rick crossed over to me and cupped my face so that she he could see the bruise. "Are you ok?" he asked me.

"Piss off," I mumbled.

Rick ignored me. He gently lowered his face to mine and kissed me right in front of everyone. "Are you ok?" he asked me again.

"I hate to spoil the moment," Ebony shouted over the sound of gunfire. "But we are exposed out here and I for one want to see my daughter again."

Daryl stared at Ebony with a look of complete loss on his face, it was akin to seeing a ghost.

"She's right," Matthew nodded.

"Who's this?" Rick questioned.

"Rick Grimes, Lieutenant Matthew Lucas," I introduced them. "My brother."

"Leg it!" Ebony shouted, shooting a soldier in the head.

"We split up," Rick ordered us. "PJ, you take them back to the prison, Maggie, Glenn, go with them."

I looked at Glenn's face and frowned, someone had done a number on him. "Come on G," I ushered. I smiled when I kissed Rick again. "Come back to us," I whispered as we split up.

"Daryl's hot," Ebony grinned as we ran. "I am loving the hair."

I shook my head.

I missed that inappropriateness sometimes.


	31. Chapter 31

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-One**

Axel and Beth opened the gate for us when we arrived back at the prison. I could help but laugh at the looks on both Ebony's and Matthew's faces when they saw the prison and the look on Beth's face when she saw Ebony walk in like a long lost soldier coming home from the war. Glenn and Maggie seemed pleased just to see the prison again, Glenn looked like he was about to throttle anyone or anything given a moment's notice.

"Ebony!" Beth cried, tears streaming down her face. She threw her arms around Ebony's neck and hugged her tightly. "Oh my god! You're alive! Jade will be so happy!"

"Guys," I spoke, "brief introduction-this is my brother Matthew, Matthew, this is Beth and Axel, you know Maggie and Glenn already, you'll meet everyone inside."

Axel looked at me. "Excuse me, miss," he spoke up. "Where's Rick, Daryl, Michonne and Oscar?" he asked me.

"Back in Woodbury," I answered. "Matthew, Maggie, close the gates. Beth, you and Axel take the towers, I want sentries up in tower's A and B."

"Carol's got the girls," Beth informed me as Ebony handed her assault rifle to Axel.

I stared at the blonde girl. "Carol's alive? Jesus how long were we gone?" I shook my head. "No. We can talk when everyone gets back. Maggie, your father will need to know you're alive." The five of us headed up to cell block C where there was a group of people sitting outside in the common room. "CARL!" I called out, keeping an eye on the people in the common room. Carl wrenched open the door and greeted me with a hug of all things. "Holding the fort, wolf?" I asked.

Carl nodded in excitement. "Yeah."

"Anything happen whilst we're gone?" I asked for a sit-rep. "Care to explain?" I frowned, nodding at the people outside the cell block.

"Some people came through the tombs," Carl told me. "You saw them when you came in. I think there's a breach on the other side of the prison. We need to have a look."

I nodded. "Yeah, we'll have a look when your father gets back," I assured him. "HERSCHEL! HERSCHEL!"

"You have to come and see Judith," Carl told me, pulling at my arm.

"You named her?" I asked him. I took his hat off his head and ruffed up his hair. "Good on you, wolf man."

Matthew grinned at me. "You're doing good, little sis," he told me.

"Aunty Jay!" Jade shouted, running out of the cell that she and Sophia had set up as a toy room. "Did you bring me a present?"

Herschel came limping out behind her on his crutches with Sophia who was holding the bible. "Maggie!" he exclaimed, seeing his daughter.

Maggie ran up the stairs. "Daddy!" she sobbed as she threw her arms around him. "I missed you daddy."

Ebony slowly walked up the steps at the same time Carol came out holding the baby. She stopped halfway and looked at Jade, tears rolling down her face. "Baby girl," she whispered.

Jade stared at her mother and screamed bloody murder. "Walker!" she screamed, running to hide behind Carol's leg.

I made my way up the stairs and patted Carol on the shoulder. "Good to have you back," I smiled. I knelt down in front of Jade, "go hug your mother."

Jade shook her head. "She's a walker."

"She bleeds just like you and me," I assured her. "Go and hug your mother-she misses you."

Jade shook her head a second time and took off running into the cell that she shared with Sophia and Carol.

Carol sighed. "Take Judith," she said at the same time she shoved the baby in my arms. She turned and took off after Jade leaving me with the baby.

Ebony stood up. She was on the verge of crying. "PJ-"

"Just give her some time," I suggested. "We've been through a lot in the past couple of months. She got used to having all of us do the parenting for her. Think of it as that saying it takes a village to raise a child." I rubbed her shoulder, "she's been taught that people who are dead are walkers. Do you understand?" I questioned.

"I can't say I pretend I do," Ebony sniffed. "I just spent so long pining for her, thinking that she was dead and now she's less then twelve feet away from me and she wants nothing to do with me." She looked me up and down, a grin forming on her face when she realised I was holding a baby. "That suits you," she whispered, trying to change the subject.

I went to say something when Judith started screaming. "Crud, she's crying," I panicked.

"Give her to me," Rick suddenly spoke.

I walked down the stars and handed Judith over to Rick. "Men wounded in battle I can handle, babies are the scariest thing I have ever had to deal with."

Rick chuckled. "PJ, make sure you cradle the head," he told me before he gave Judith back to me. "Hold her in the crook of your arm," Rick instructed me. "Steady her with the lower part of your arm and hand."

Blood hell I felt super awkward.

"That suits you," Rick smiled.

I turned red.

Thank god Ebony spoke up. "Where's Daryl?" Ebony questioned.

Rick frowned. "It's alright, he's alive," he assured Ebony, his eyes fixated on me. "We ran into Merle and they went off together."

"He left?" Ebony and Carol asked at the same time.

"He's gone?" Sophia whispered.

"I couldn't have Merle here after what he did to Glenn," Rick answered, turning to Glenn. "So Daryl went with him. Look, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Ebony assured him. She looked incredibly upset but she'd spent a lot of time with Merle in the past few months and she was a good judge of character. "Merle…well I don't know what kind of man Merle was before he become the Governor's pet but close proximity to that man is like toxic venom in your veins."

Rick looked to Ebony and Matthew. "I'll need to know everything you can give me," he told them. "And I need to know about these people in the common room."

"They came in through the administrative part of the prison," Carl answered. "Wall's down. They said to Herschel that they wanted to stay."

Rick paused. He turned to me, "what do you think PJ?"

I looked down at Judith who had fallen asleep in my arms. "No," I whispered.

Ebony glared at me. "What-PJ-"

"We tried to help a group of people before but they ended up killing Lori and T-Dog," I growled at her. "They can't stay. We've got Judith, Jade, Sophia and Carl to think about. They've got no kids. I'm sorry-the answer is no."

Rick nodded. "I agree."

Herschel frowned but he kept his opinions to himself.

Rick looked at me. "Put Judith to sleep and show Ebony and your brother around. I'll deal with our guests."

I nodded. "Come on you two," I gestured to Ebony and Matthew. "This place is a soldier's worst nightmare and wet dream."

Matthew laughed. "I'm proud of you sis…you're doing well."

"Can you explain to me Michael and John?" I asked him.

Matthew nodded. "Sure…where am I gonna sleep?" he grinned.

I laughed.

Same old brother.

I missed this.


	32. Chapter 32

**I've been a total space head atm - I'd like to thank all my fantastic reviewers - YOU GUYS ROCK!**

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-Two**

Ebony and I were on guard duty in the tower for the afternoon leading into the evening. Despite the times we were living in all I could think of was how much like before the apocalypse this was. Whenever I was home we would sit on the couch and just talk and talk and talk until we were practically asleep-I needed to know everything from the moment she was separated from us to what she had been doing now. I also needed to know who the African American was with the sword to which Ebony said that she would explain when we had a chance.

Well now here was our chance.

"Tell me everything," I urged her as I stared out the scope I was using as a binocular.

Ebony sat her rifle up against the bench and sighed. "Well I told you that I crawled out from underneath the heard. There was so many of them, PJ. Grabbing at me and each other, I was able to crawl out from underneath them and I ran for days. I made my way back to the highway but Herschel's truck had been abandoned and the fuel was gone. I couldn't stay long so I went back to the cabin where I stayed for a few days. A herd forced me to move on."

I continued listening. "Go on," I nodded.

Ebony sighed. "I was almost walker chow when someone stabbed the walker in the head. When I looked up John was standing there with his hand out-I knew who he was the moment I saw him. I've seen those photos and that one time I saw him at the Christmas party." She sighed, "John and Merle took me to Woodbury. I met the Governor and everyone else, they were all nice, but they weren't you…"

"I missed you," I whispered.

"I missed you," Ebony replied. "I wanted to be out there every single day to look for you," she continued. "Then one day the Governor comes and tells me they found her body…she was a walker…John said he had to put her down, I wanted to see it but they said they burnt her…"

"Should have been your first clue," I mumbled. "John would always let you see the body. He judges reactions based on fear and sadness. Easier to manipulate…he learnt that from my father."

"I thought I loved him," Ebony whispered. "He was always so good to me…there were moments where he scared the crap out of me but-"

"Can you say ex-boyfriends for seven hundred dollars?" I judged her.

Ebony rolled her eyes.

I reached out and squeezed her hand. "I let you go," I whispered. "I should have never let you go…"

Ebony shook her head. "You said it yourself…they would have tipped the Jeep…I let go."

I stared at her, stunned. "What? No-"

"I let you go," she assured me. "The safety of my daughter is paramount over everything else…I just wish she would talk to me."

"Give her time," I suggested. "Whilst you've been living in the safety of Woodbury-we've been running from a herd of two hundred head for eight months. It's been hard. Really hard, Jade will come around when she's comfortable enough." I patted her shoulder, "she loves you-you know that."

Ebony nodded. "Yeah I know…It's just I've missed her so much. I want to sleep curled up next to her and not in a cell next to her."

"It will happen," I assured her. "Just let it flow. Ok?"

Ebony sighed. "Ok…I love you."

"I love you," I replied as we bumped fists and made little explosions with our hands.

"Speaking of," Ebony started, changing the subject. "Why aren't you in there strip teasing Officer Grimes?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Babe-Judith is three days old…Lori died three days ago after I cut her open to remove her baby. He may have kissed me in Woodbury but as far as I'm concerned he'll come to me when he's ready. Not when you need to listen to my sex life and not when I'm ready. When he's ready."

"I've done duty before," Ebony smirked. "Go-go have some fun with the police man…see if he still has his handcuffs."

I punched her in the arm. "You're a dork." I turned back to my scope, "and no offence but Officer Grimes still doesn't trust you and Matthew so I have to stay. I'm second-in-command here so I have to trust in what our leader says."

"So essentially you're First Lady of the Prison," Ebony smirked.

"Eb's-you want an arrow in your face?" I asked her.

Ebony cracked up laughing. "Just face the music my honey. You're First Lady of the Prison now, Rick's got his eye on you. You should have seen how he looked at you when you were holding Judith. And the added bonus of Carl hugging you and how he acts around you-kid's giving you the go ahead."

I shook my head. "Unbelievable, Eb's. So tell me about this Michonne."

Ebony launched herself into a tale of how Merle found Andrea and Michonne in the woods-Andrea was almost dead from the flu apparently. Ebony had been so happy to see her thinking that she knew something but the blonde knew nothing. Merle had been sent out after Michonne when she escaped the town but reported back falsely that she had died. Neither John or the Governor were concerned-they just wanted to know what the prison was. The two of us continued trading stories until Matthew and Carol came to relive us of guard duty. When we returned back to Cell Block C, Ebony flashed me a wink and disappeared into her cell to get some shut eye. The last thing I heard from my best was her crying herself to sleep. I shook my head and deposited my weapons on the top of the bunk before giving myself a wash down with the water that Beth had placed in my cell for me. When I was semi-clean and dressed in my pyjamas, I set out to looking for Rick to tell him everything Ebony had told me. I found our leader in his cell down below just putting Judith to sleep. Someone-most likely Beth or Carl had found a box and written Little Ass Kicker on the side-man I missed my partner in crime.

"How is she?" I asked, scaring the crap out of Rick.

"Hungry," he answered honestly. "I don't know what we would have done if you and Daryl hadn't gone looking for supplies."

I shrugged. "Protect and defend-" pausing with a grin, I shook my head, "sorry-that's your motto." I leant against the cell door, "I've got some information from Ebony-you should know everything you can about the Governor and my brother John."

Rick raised an eyebrow. "Your brother John?" he quoted.

I nodded. "He and the twins-Michael and Matthew hooked up with the Governor-Matthew is the one that is one duty with Carol. Matt's got a moral compass cleaner that a priest. He's also an engineer so he'll help us sort this place out."

Rick nodded. "What can you tell me about John?"

"Pure psychopath," I answered truthfully. "My parents pretty much let him do whatever he wanted with the rest of us since he'll be the next head of the family. God," I sighed, "he gave me more broken bones than any enemy solider or drill ever did. The Marine Corps sure knows how to spit out its psychopaths. John will be the one we need to look out for. The Governor is just a spoilt child crying over someone stealing a toy that's not even his."

"You could have been killed," Rick spoke.

I shrugged. "In case you haven't noticed Rick-life holds no guarantees these days. I'm resigned to my fate-if and when it happens the last bullet will be for me.

He shook his head. "PJ-I care about you."

"I know," I replied. "I may be resigned to dying but I am not going to be some rebound lay. When you're ready for me Rick you come and get me. Not before." I shook my head as I talked. "There's no way I want you to avoid me for the rest of our very short life because you think you made a mistake."

He just stared at me.

"We'll finish this tomorrow," I declared. I walked over to Judith's makeshift crib and leant in to kiss her on the head. "Live long and prosper, Little Ass Kicker," I whispered. I rubbed her head and turned to leave however Rick was standing behind me.

"You're not some rebound lay," Rick assured me before he backed me up against the wall and started kissing me.

"Than what am I?" I managed to get out in between kisses.

"Someone that I care about very much," he disclosed. "Someone I'd like to try to be with even after everything that's happened. But that's up to you. You can turn me away now but I know what I want."

"How can you?" I frowned.

Rick patted his chest. "I feel it." He took my hand and placed it on the skin over his heart. "Can you feel it?"

"Show me," I whispered. "Show me, Rick. Show me what you know you want, show me what I want." I stared into those grey-blue eyes and kissed him much slower this time. Finally, was all I could think when he started pulling at my clothes.


	33. Chapter 33

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-Three**

For the first time in months I found that I had slept through the night.

When I woke up the following morning, Rick was still sound asleep and breathing gently on my neck and he held me close to him. I couldn't help but smile at the whole situation, I've wanted this for such a long time that I never thought-not once-that it would be a reality. In my mind I would have been content to stay like this in the perfect little world that we had created but Judith started to grizzle for her morning feed.

Carefully I pealed Rick's arm off my waist and slowly sat up as not to wake him before I got to my feet. I quickly pulled my underwear and my shirt on then I picked up Judith who immediately started pulling at my hair which made me think how desperately I needed a haircut. Giving a quick look at Rick, I ducked out of the cell and made my way down to the cell that I had heard Beth set up for Judith and the kids. The formula was sitting next to one of those gas stoves so as I turned the gas on and lit it up, I rocked Judith in my arm and started singing a nursery rhyme my mother used to sing to me when father wasn't home. "_Hush-a-bye, don't you cry, go to sleep, my little baby, when you wake, you shall have all the pretty little horses, dapples and greys, pintos and bays, all the pretty little horses…_"

"Mum used to sing that to us," Matthew frowned as he came into the cell. "You remember?"

I nodded. "That's why I'm singing it to Judith."

"You would have been a great mum," Matthew teased, "but hey, in our fucked up family kid would have been drilled a soldier." He sighed, "you should have gotten out whilst you had the chance sis."

I shrugged. "Not that easy, Matt. You know that. I rebelled, did drugs, slept around, got arrested but dad got his way in the end and forced me to sign up-I just didn't think I'd be good at it that's all."

"Good at what?" Matthew inquired. He came in and sat down on the bed, offering to take Judith so I could finish her bottle.

"Killing," I replied nonchalantly, adding the formula to the warm water. I hoped that I was doing this right because I had no idea what the hell I was doing.

Matthew sighed. "You're a natural leader sis, I know it, dad knew it, John knows it which is why he used to torture you so badly. Speaking of," he announced, changing the subject, "have you heard from mum and dad?"

I nodded, testing the milk on my arm like I had seen Ebony do with Jade a million times. "Yeah-I did. It was before I got pulled back into active duty. I got a phone call from dad-they were on that cruise, he said that another passenger had bitten mum and almost ripped her arm off-I freaked and tried to ask him anything and everything but the phone cut off when I heard dad call out mum's name and some kind of snarling in the background followed by dad screaming. Than the phone died and when it rang again it was my unit commander." I took Judith off Matthew and settled down to start feeding her.

Matthew sighed. "That sucks…I was hoping that they'd be ok. Just like I hope Theo, Jacob and Kevin are ok."

I shrugged again. "They were all stationed at the same base, and Iran is hot-these things don't do so well in arid heat."

Matthew stood up and roughed my hair up. "I'm gonna go rustle up some grub-see if I can hunt some food for us. You keep playing domestics."

"Drop dead," I told him with a scowl. "Give me ten and I'll come with you!" I shouted after him. As he left laughing, I continued feeding Judith until she wouldn't take anymore formula, afterwards I burped her and changed her diaper just like I had seen Ebony do with Jade. I was about to return Judith back to Rick when I heard him and Herschel talking in hushed tones outside Rick's cell.

"I see you and PJ stepped your relationship up a bit last night," Herschel pointed out. "Rick…are you sure you're doing to right thing?"

Silence.

Rick sighed. "I feel guilty-Herschel-I really do. There's no doubt about that."

I felt my heart sink down to the bottom of my stomach.

"Guilty about what?" Herschel inquired. "Sleeping with PJ so soon after Lori passed?"

Silence.

"No," Rick replied. "I feel guilty that I don't feel guilty about sleeping with her. I thought that I would be consumed with guilt over it but I don't. Hell, I don't even feel that guilty about the fact that Lori only died four days ago…what kind of a man does that make me, Herschel?"

I shook my head, no longer wanting to hear any more of this conversation, I cleared my throat to announce myself then started downstairs. "Morning," I smiled, handing Judith back over to Rick. "She's been fed, I'm going to go hunting with Matthew."

Herschel looked at us. "I'll leave you both to it."

Damn him, I muttered. Wise old know-it-all.

I held my hand up before Rick could say anything and I shook my head. "Don't start Rick. I told you that you should have just let it go if this was how everything was going to play out." I spun around and legged it back up to my cell to get dressed and arm myself.

When I came out, Rick was waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs. "I don't regret it," he told me in a matter-of-fact tone. "I should feel guilty about sleeping with you so soon after Lori died but I don't."

I stood there silently.

"That's what I'm worried about," he continued. "I'm worried that I don't feel bad about it at all. She was the mother of my children and I don't feel bad that we're together."

"So we're together?" I asked him.

Rick nodded. "I like to think we are."

I paused and nodded. "We are…listen…we can talk when I get back-like just sit and talk. We have to do it."

Rick leant in and kissed me for a while before he let me go. "Good hunting," he smiled.

I gave him a half assed salute before slipping out from underneath him and making my way out to the courtyard and Matthew. The two of us where let out of the gate by Carol who Matthew flashed a flirty wink at. I stared at him and elbowed him in the ribs. "What the fuck?" I asked him with a grin.

Matthew shrugged. "We talked about pretty much everything when we did duty-she's a good woman-sings your praises for rescuing her daughter back on the farm."

"Just doing my job," I shrugged.

He shook his head. "No you're not-you're doing what comes naturally."

I laughed and shook my head.

We spent the rest of the hunt in utter silence, taking down a combined catch of three rabbits, one baby boar and two owls. We were contemplating whether to go back to the prison or carry on for another hour or so when we hear machine gun fire.

The two of us launched into action and bolted back to the prison.

By the time we got out to the road, Matthew and I found ourselves stopped by John and Michael.

"Two choices, Velox, Calculo," John spoke to us, calm and collected. "You come with us or you stay and die here."

I didn't need to think about it. "We're staying."

Matthew nodded.

Michael glared at his brother. "I thought you always had my back."

Matthew shook his head. "You're a fucking crazy psychopath when you're around the Governor and John. I'm staying. These people have done nothing!"

A truck sped past us, blowing up a large cloud of dust. By the time it cleared, John and Michael were gone.

Matthew and I took off at a run back towards the prison.

When we found the familiar prison yard, the front gate had been knocked down and the front yard was full of walkers and the truck that had past us earlier. I scanned the yard and froze when I saw Rick pinned against the fence and surrounded by walkers.

Michael pulled me back when I screamed. "NO!" he shouted, pulling me away from the gathering walkers. "PHIL NO!"

"RICK!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, getting the dead's attention.

A walker grabbed at Rick and leant in to bite down on him….everything slowed down…I slipped out from Michaal's arms and ran towards Rick just as a crossbow bolt flew past me and hit the walker in the head. I spun around mid-run and saw Daryl burst out of the bushes with someone I took to be his brother behind him. I notched an arrow in my bow and turned back around as Daryl came up beside me.

"You done screaming like a girl?" Daryl growled at me, loading another bolt.

"I am a girl," I replied sarcastically before the four of us launched ourselves into the fight.


	34. Chapter 34

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated character apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-Four**

After a quick fight, carving a path through the crowd of walkers, the five of us made our way to the courtyard and watched in horror as walkers flooded the prison yard. I dropped my bow and ran straight into Rick who hugged me fiercely mumbling thanks into my ear.

Ebony came out of the bottom of the tower with Jade and Sophia, the moment that Jade saw Daryl, she broke away from her mother and took off running. "DADDY!" she screamed at the top of her lungs and crashed into his leg, sobbing. "Don't ever leave…"

I raised an eyebrow at Daryl, Jade had always called him Uncle Daryl-never daddy before. It was certainly an interesting turn of events, I knew that Jade had never gotten to know her father and that was because he was a dead beat asshole who took off running as soon as the stick turned blue. The only reason Ebony had moved to America was because Jade's father had tried to take her-something about child support that he didn't want to pay.

Daryl hesitated before he knelt down and hugged her. "I'm not going anywhere, rabbit," he whispered.

"Well ain't that sweet," Merle smirked, starring at Daryl and Jade. "Don't you think so, Eb's baby? Makes you wanna be sick."

Ebony ignored him, she seemed to have that down pat. I broke away from Rick and went to look back to the prison yard, trying to think how on earth we would close the giant gap now letting walkers into the yard. Everyone except the four of us had slipped back into the cell block to talk about the problem.

Daryl cleared the tears away from Jade's face. "You should be with your mother, rabbit."

Jade shook her head in fear. "Walker," she whispered.

Daryl shook his head. "She's your mother-she's not a walker," he assured her.

I came back over to Jade and knelt down in front of her. "Rabbit…Daryl's right…you're mother isn't a walker…you remember how I used to go away for my job and come back months later?"

Jade nodded, her bottom lip trembled. "Did mama go to fight the bad people too?" she asked me.

I nodded. "Yes, mama did. And now she's back and she needs all the cuddles in the world because she missed you so much. Just like I missed you…when I got home from fighting the bad guys I would snuggle up and read you the Hobbit even though you didn't know what was happening. You stayed with me because you knew I needed all the cuddles in the world. Now mama does." Ebony had tears streaming down her face at that point and I must admit so did I.

Jade ran over to her mother and crashed into her crying as loud as a five year old could.

"My darling baby girl!" Ebony cried, tears rolling down her face. "Oh my darling baby girl, mama missed you so much!" she sniffed and continued sobbing into her daughters dirty pink, Hello Kitty shirt. "Mama loves you so much…to the moon."

"And back…" Jade hiccupped.

I tugged on Daryl's shirt and motioned for him to go over to Ebony and Jade. "You're family now buddy…ohana, dude."

Daryl stared at me. "What the hell?" he growled.

I shook his head, pity on Daryl Dixon for never having seen Lilo and Stitch a million times like I had. "Lilo and Sitch, Dixon. Ohana means family, Daryl…you're their family now." I stood up and pushed him when the hesitation became written all over his face.

Daryl crossed the courtyard and when Ebony stood up with Jade in her arms, he enveloped them in a hug that made me kind of envious. This would be one of those perfect family photos.

"Baby girl," Ebony whispered, kissing Jade on her head. "Sweetie…Daryl isn't you dad-"

"But I can be," Daryl cut her off. He looked at Ebony with a smile despite the shit that was happening and kissed her softly. "I want to be."

Ok Merle had it right when he said it was so sweet it made you want to be sick. I turned around and shook my head to clear it-too much god dang emotion in less than twenty-four hours is too much for me. I took a deep breath to clear my head and when I saw Rick standing on the cat walk observing the mess the Governor and John had made I knew I had to go up and have my moment with him.

"So what's the plan?" I asked Rick, stopping by his side. "We running or staying?"

Rick sighed. "We've spent too much time running, we make a stand. You with me?"

"Always," I replied. "You've done good by us even if some of us cry about it. We'll need weapons though. The Governor will have us outgunned. And if I know John and his OCD they will have cleared out everything so we'll have to go further."

"Will you and Matthew pick out some locations you think we could clear?" Rick asked me.

"Yes," I answered. I gripped Rick's hand and squeezed it gently, "I'll be here until the day I die just promise me when I do you put a bullet in me and you don't look back or hesitate. I'm not gonna be a walker."

"You say the most romantic things," Rick lightly joked.

"I'm serious," I told him. "Look-I don't have long term relationships because the men and women I've dated hate the fact that I'm not all prissy and innocent. They expect someone who isn't-well-me. I'm never going to be Lori but what I will be is the best damn parent I can be to Judith and whatever Carl wants me to be I can be."

Rick turned away from me and stared back over the prison yard. He looked so tired.

"Maybe you shouldn't be leader anymore," I whispered. "You deserve a rest-let us handle this."

He faced me. I was expecting an argument from him, not the face of an agreeing man. "Carl said that same thing," Rick confessed.

"Children are surprisingly wise," I told Rick. "One morning I was meant to be watching Jade but I fell asleep. When I woke up she was sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor covered in chocolate topping and marshmellow frosting. When I asked her why she did it when she knew full well that she would get into trouble she turned to me, looked me in the eye and told me that she did it because it was tasty but now she was sticky and that she should probably get cleaned up or the mess would attract ants. She was a few days off four."

Rick laughed. "Carl did that one day but with paints."

I chuckled. "Messy little bastards aren't they?"

"Thank you, PJ," Rick smiled. "For being my god given solace when I needed it. I know you're not Lori and I know you never will be. You are your own person. I look forward to knowing you."

"We should go talk with the others and start on some kind of defence plan," I suggested. "If we can get a couple of us in the towers we can have a guard. We also need to look at the tombs."

Rick nodded. "Looks like we've got a lot of work to do."

"Let's get started," I smiled.


	35. Chapter 35

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-Five**

I gotta say that there is nothing in this fucked up world that makes me feel more comfortable, more alive, than waking up in the safety of Rick Grimes arms. I suppose you could call it day two of our post-apocalyptic relationship and yet the only people to catch on are Matthew, Herschel, Carl and Spirit. Carl sort of gave me a half-hearted smile when he saw me kissing his father then announced he would take Spirit outside to play with Fluffy and Ollie. Rick told me to give him some time and then gave me Judith to feed.  
After Judith's feed that morning, I changed her before taking her to Beth and then sussing out what I was going to have for breakfast. Left over rabbit I think. I wanted to make a supply run, head towards Atlanta and go through the city properly with a small team. Hopefully Rick would be more than happy for me, Ebony, Daryl and Matthew to go even though we would be gone for the better part of a week-maybe more.

In the common room Ebony and Carol were already sorting the kids out with their breakfast and Matthew was talking away to Daryl about something to do with sorting out a rigging station for water from the small creek near the prison. I sat down beside Jade with a yawn. "Dang I miss coffee!" I groaned. "And Red Bull, V, Mother…"

"Heart attack waiting to happen," Ebony cut in with a sing-song voice. She sat a plate down in front of Jade and Sophia. "Those things are really bad for you."

"Says you, miss I make a cake mixture just to eat the batter. Made your ass bigger than my ego," I retorted back, face planted on the table top. "How can you all be so damn chipper? Makes me wanna gank myself. Just walk out into a mine field and boom goes the dynamite."

Ebony rolled her eyes. "You're being overly dramatic. You think you'd be happier now that you're getting laid."

Carol glanced up at me. "PJ-"

"Can we talk about here sex life when I'm not in the room?" Matthew suggested. "She's my baby sister."

"How about we change the subject altogether?" I piped up just as Rick came in and sat down beside me. "Talk about something completely unrelated to me like the people we lost whilst Ebony was away. We haven't talked about Lori or T-Dog because everything's a big rush with Judith than the Governor." I sat back up and rolled my sleeve up to expose a series of simple lines on my arm.

"What's that?" Ebony frowned.

"People we've lost," I answered. "Patricia, Jimmy, my mum and dad, Theo, Kevin, Jacob, T-Dog, Lori…you."

"Where did you get the time to tattoo yourself?" Ebony burst out laughing. "You did not bring your tattoo gun with you did you?" she asked me.

"No power, moron," I reminded her. "I brought the inks with me and applied the ancient Chinese art of tattooing."

"So you stabbed yourself until the ink stayed in?" she retorted.

"Bingo," I grinned.

"As tattoos go that pretty bland baby sis," Matthew pointed out. He got up and pulled his shirt off to reveal a large black Cerberus covering the whole of his back, its jaws were dripping with a mixture of saliva and blood. "This is kick ass."

Daryl shrugged. "PJ's got some cool tats," he argued in my defence. "The Velox is pretty cool, the tiger claw scratches on your calf, the ones on your arm and the cross you've got on your ankle as well as that blue sea horse on your ass."

"WHAT?" Ebony and Rick shouted at the same time.

I grinned. It was kind of enjoyable knowing that they were squirming in their seats. "Daryl only saw the sea horse when we were having sex," I grinned.

"We did not!" Daryl argued at me.

I frowned and battered my eyelashes. "Am I really that forgettable Daryl?" I asked him. "Even after that fantastic toe turning sex we had? You wound me, Daryl."

Daryl stared at Ebony. "We did not have sex, I swear."

Ebony glared at me. "I know. PJ takes some sick pleasure in seeing people squirm."

I burst out laughing. "I get my entertainment where I can find it."

"That wasn't funny," Rick informed me.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah it kinda was." I grabbed a chunk of rabbit off the girl's plate and stood up, chewing away. "I want to take a small team for a supply run," I informed Rick, "into Atlanta."

Rick shook his head. "Absolutely not," he argued.

I folded my arms. "We're down a fence, Rick. We could get hardware supplies, food, clothes. Atlanta fell pretty quickly which means there is food, supplies, clothing just sitting there. There's a Costco right on the edge of the city, two teams of two can go in undetected."

"She's got a point Rick," Daryl shrugged.

Rick stared at me, I could see it mulling over in his mind. "Fine! Just you and one other-we can't afford to lose any more of us."

"Eb's?" I asked her. "You up for a run into Atlanta?"

"Bring it on," she grinned.

"Mama?" Jade whispered. "Are you leaving again?"

"Only for a couple of days," Ebony whispered, kissing her head. She looked up at me, "I'll get geared up. We can leave as soon as you're ready."

"Awesome," I grinned. "We can play some good old fashion AC/DC on the way."

"You' should have been a mullet rocker in the past life," Ebony laughed. She leant over and kissed Daryl, mimicking one of those scenes out of a romance movie-the only thing that was missing was the whole foot thing.

"I'm gonna vomit," I declared, leaving the common room to find Judith and say goodbye to her. The little poop machine had really grown on me. Footsteps behind me alerted me to someone following me. When I turned around, Rick was close behind me.

"PJ, promise me you'll be careful," he whispered. He gently kissed me, "I'd hate to lose you, now. After everything that's happened I can't lose you."

"You won't," I replied confidently.

"PJ-" he started.

I kissed him again to shut him up. "Rick-you won't lose me. I promise. I'll bring back as much as we can afford to carry. I already have a plan."

"Which is?" Rick asked.

"Loud music away from where we need to go," I assured him. "I'll be back and ready to fight for our home. Trust me."

"You'll be the death of me," Rick smiled.

"Well, certainly not from worry," I smirked. "I'll be back old man."

"When you come back," he started, "will you moves your stuff into my cell?" Rick asked me.

A strangled noise came from the hallway and we both turned to see Ebony watching us. Thank god for small favours. "Now I'm gonna vomit."

I rolled my eyes and flung my arm around her to give her a noogy. "Come on, babes, let's go see Judith than we'll leave."

Rick appeared genially hurt by how I had deflected his question but I didn't want to give him something to look forward to just in case I did break his promise.

"Did I interrupt something?" Ebony frowned quietly. She'd seen his face to.

"Rick asked me to move into the cell with him," I replied.

"I'm moving my stuff into Daryl's," she shrugged. "What's the problem?"

"I could die!" I argued. "If we get caught in Atlanta, our main focus is getting you out cause you've got more to live for."

"And you don't?" Ebony argued.

"You've got Jade!" I scowled, stopping near Beth. "That's one up from what I got. So I'm not gonna say yes to something that could potentially break the man if I don't return! End of discussion." Turning to Judith I took her from Beth's arms and gave her a quick kiss and a cuddle. "Be a good girl," I whispered in her ear.

"More to live for huh?" Ebony asked me, her face imitating Sam's bitchface pretty well. "Yeah-totally."

I ignored her and went to pack a light bag and grab my bow and quiver from Rick's cell. Eventually I met Ebony at one of the cars marked West Georgia Correction Facility, she sat with her feet up on the dashboard, nursing an assault rifle in her lap. "Naw, look at the mummy and her little baby."

"Burn in hell," Ebony muttered.

"Already am," I replied, getting into the car.

Ebony handed me a pair of aviator sunglasses and put her own pair on. "Found them in the glove box."

I laughed. ""Let's rock and roll."


	36. Chapter 36

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-Six**

Not wanting to be out on the road after dark, Ebony and I made our way back to the place that we both knew pretty well: The Farm.

Herschel's farmhouse was still standing albeit it looked a little worse for wear-just like some of the abandoned homes that Daryl and I had swept through on supply runs. There was several walkers mulling about the place, with the combination of my bow and Ebony's machete, we took them out silently. Once the place was clear of walkers, I gathered the bodies up and piled them on the porch as some kind of cover whilst Ebony moved the car close to the house. Before the sky turned dark, I set up a homemade trap to warn us of any walker intrusions than we settled down for the night in the upstairs bedroom.

I wasn't expecting to find any of our old things but sitting on the dresser, covered in a layer of dust was our bags of clothes. As I zipped them up and sat them by the window Ebony came in to tell me that there was still running water-cold-but running. That was good enough for me.

I tool first guard duty but as I sat against the door, I could see that Ebony was having trouble sleeping.

"PJ?" Ebony suddenly asked me as I ran a finger along the arrow shaft.

"Yeah babe?" I asked her.

"Do you think they're still alive?" she frowned. "My mum and dad?"

I shrugged. "I don't know babe, they could be. Australia is a pretty dry country, although with them living in Sydney I would say the fair bet is no."

She sighed. "I thought about them a lot in the past few months. John said that they could be alive-"

"That's why M16 borrowed him," I told her. "He's good at manipulating people. You've just got to be strong for Jade and be there always-that's all you need to worry about."

"Why won't you move in with Rick?" Ebony asked me again. "And don't give me that bullshit answer you gave me in the prison, tell me why."

"Lucas, Philomena, J, Corporal, 957289," I answered with a frown on my face.

Ebony sat up and in the darkness I could feel her eyes piercing into me. "I'm moving in with Daryl because I love him and he loves both me and Jade."

I rolled my eyes. "That's different, I've been with Rick two days and you've been doing the horizontal horror with Daryl longer than I have with Rick."

"Is this like that time your boyfriend, Nick, asked you to move in with him and you broke up with him?" Ebony frowned. "Even then you were dating him for two years. You can see it in the way that Rick looks at you that he's head over heels girl."

"You're not black," I reminded her.

"I like to think in my past life I was a sassy African American," she smiled.

"This is a discussion that I should be having with Rick, not you," I pointed out.

"You're afraid!" Ebony smirked. "The big bad soldier is afraid of moving in with a man!"

"Goodnight, Ebony," I spoke out, a little louder than I should have. "You've got guard duty in six hours, get some rest."

Ebony grumbled and lay back down on the bed.

It was midnight when I woke her up to take her turn at duty. She was silently watching the door when I went to bed and the next time I woke up, the sun was rising.

An hour after the sun rose, we were off with a couple bags of clothes and seed from Herschel's kitchen. It took us most of the day to navigate the highway, siphoning fuel as we could and as the sun fell, Ebony pointed out that there was a quarry that we could stay in for the night.

* * *

At the quarry we found a series of abandoned and ripped up tents, covered in old blood. There was a shell of an old red sports car that had been stripped of pretty much everything. A bit away from the remains of the main camp site there was a series of graves with crosses that had names carved into the wood.

"I don't know if I feel right here," Ebony pointed out. "People died here."

"People die everywhere," I replied.

We didn't set anything up instead we just sat on the hood of the car looking up at the sky as the day turned into night. "How long are we looking at spending in the city?" Ebony questioned me.

"No less than a day," I told her. "First thing we need to do is draw the walkers away from where we need to go and I think we should use the main roads."

"Why not back allies?" Ebony frowned.

"We'd be fucked if we get caught," I replied. "Main roads, lots of room." I sat up and sighed, "you're right…I am scared."

"Of Rick?" Ebony laughed.

I looked out over the abandoned quarry. "Stability."

Ebony looked over at me. "Stability?"

I nodded. "This world is so fucked, so upside down, so chaotic. I've always thrived on chaos which is why I'm such a good soldier. If the Governor doesn't take the prison from us we could be there for a very long time which means I could become you!"

"Did you just mean that as a compliment or an insult?" she inquired. "Cause it sure sounded like an insult."

"I'm not good with stability," I argued back. "I'm a student of chaos theory, Eb's."

"You're doing good with Judith," Ebony assured me. "And I'm sure Carl will come around eventually. She patted my shoulder, "love you babe."

"Love you," I sighed.

* * *

When the sun rose over the city of Atlanta, two days after we had set out from the prison both Ebony and I watched in awe at the sight of the abandoned city.

"Would you look at that," Ebony gasped, staring through a pair of binoculars. "I can't see any walkers."

"Doesn't mean they're not there," I answered.

We turned to look at each other than silently got back in the car. Neither of us had been in a big city for a long time, I had been here about five months ago but a lot can happen in five months. There's death in that city…but there is also life.


	37. Chapter 37

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Thirty-Seven**

I'd only been in the city about seven months ago but so much had changed since I'd been back. The roads and sidewalks, no longer maintained were cracked and growing out with weeds, wild animals were running freely through the city, there were bones strewn across the ground, the evidence of walkers were all over the place.

"Where are we?" Ebony questioned in a whisper.

"Spring Street," I answered, glancing at the sign over a former deli. "Why are we whispering?"

"There could be walkers!" Ebony replied.

"We haven't seen any," I answered again. "Most likely they're chasing the animals that have taken back the great plains of the City of Atlanta."

"Thank god there isn't any more Discovery Channel, David Attenborough," Ebony smirked.

I chuckled and threw on my best impression of a British Accent. "Watch as the _Homo-Sapien_ makes its way through the Great Plains of the City of Atlanta on a hunting and gathering expedition."

"Stop that!" Ebony laughed.

"Watch as the great _femina_ hunters search for food in these trying times," I laughed as we came to a stop out the front of a dishevelled looking hardware store. "This could be a good place to have a look."

"We left the cruiser outside the city," Ebony objected. "We may look badass but we can still only take small loads."

"That's where that comes in handy," I grinned, pointing at repair and delivery truck with the door wide open, half crashed on the sidewalk.

"Yeah just let me Macgyver up a tool kit," Ebony growled.

"Just keep an eye out," I growled, heading over to the truck. I shot a walker in the head as it started out from underneath the truck. I wrenched my arrow out and cleaned it off on my jeans as I climbed inside the truck. Searching around for the keys I found them on the floor with the key chain attached to a severed finger. "Well that's disgusting," I whispered, tossing the finger out the cabin. I inserted the keys and turned it on-nothing. "Damn it," I cursed, it had a half a tank of gas.

"Problem?" Ebony asked me.

"It's got gas but for some reason it won't start," I replied. "I wish Rick had let me bring Mattie with us. He would have sorted it." I got out of the car and popped the hood, as I stared at it I realised that I had no idea what I was doing. "Any gas cans in the store?" I asked Ebony.

Ebony vanished inside for a minute and came out. "Must be Christmas." She tossed it over to me and I set about syphoning the gas, sitting my bow against the tire. "There's minimal supplies in there at best, someone has picked this place over and most probably everything else as well."

"Anything on the map?" I asked her.

Ebony pulled the map out of her pocket and opened it up. "Department store," she answered, "hospital about a forty-five minute walk away-we should steer clear of that. It would be ground zero for the walkers."

"Anything useful?" I asked.

"When I came here a few years ago," Ebony started, "you were on tour. I seem to remember there was hunting club nearby. They'd have weapons."

"If they're not already used up," I reminded her. I finished with the gas and handed it to Ebony to carry. "I hope we can find a new bow at some point, or some parts-I need some parts."

"We need a lot of things," Ebony replied. "I'm thinking of setting up a school for the kids which means pencils, books, stuff like that. We also need clothes, baby clothes, adult's clothes, hygiene products, guns, ammunition."

"Thank you," I grumbled.

The two of us continue on, making our way through the city. We came across several walkers, taking them out one at a time until we found a functioning vehicle that we could load with some supplies. We weren't finding much in the way of food or ammunition but we were finding clothes and general medical products. We loaded up our new pickup with the boxes of clothes and basic medical supplies but as we did we were both wondering where the hell all the walkers were. There was a possibility that the walkers were leaving the cities as the food ran out but not with the amount of walkers that there were in the city. There would still be some walkers in city-there had to be.

As we carried on through the city, Ebony was the first on to spot a sporting goods store. She let me out in the parking lot and I loaded my bow as I made my way inside. The place was littered with walkers. Between me and Ebony we managed to take them out one by one until they were just corpses on the ground. We made several trips back to the pickup with enough arrows to last Daryl and me a long time, some clothes and some MRE's stored in the back. The delivery receipt was dates almost a year ago-they hadn't been unpacked yet. Just as Ebony removed the last box, I came around the back of the counter and pulled a black wooden box out from underneath the glass. The piece of paper on the box was marked out for a Scott Waters, apparently Scott had paid almost a grand for a brand new Lycan Compound Bow.

Just what I always wanted, a new bow.

I was beginning to think that we were going to need another car and that we'd just take the gas and abandoned the cruiser when we got back out.

After the sports store we found something in the way of clothes for the adults as well as the kids. It was about time something started going our way.

"It's getting late," Ebony spoke as we made our last stop for the day. She put the pickup out into the street and we started searching the stores. As we came around the corner Ebony and I suddenly found ourselves faced with a head of at least fifty walkers.

"Fuck me sideways," I gasped.

The walkers all turned to face us, their yellow eyes staring us down like the meat we really were.

"Run!" Ebony shouted.

I nodded and we took off in the direction of a beauty shop. I slammed the door shut behind us and when I turned to find out exactly what we were looking at-it was a lingerie store. "Well this is awkward," I gasped, looking out the window. "I'm gonna die in a beauty shop/lingerie store." The only thing keeping out the walkers from us was a thin security grate and a glass window. We had five minutes at best.

"Well at least we could die pretty," Ebony laughed. "Maybe we should grab something for the guys."

"Watch the door!" I shouted, ignoring her comment but smiling about it at the same time. I ran out the back of the beauty shop to search for anything flammable. I was looking for anything that had a warning sign about being flammable. "GET TO THE BACK OF THE STORE!" I shouted.

"Way ahead of you," Ebony answered. Her eyes widened when she saw me pour a bottle of something over the rest of the chemicals. "What the fuck?" she asked me.

"Big boom!" I grinned, noticing that she was holding a bag of something. "When we get out, you run back to the car as fast as you can-we're leaving!"

She nodded and hesitatingly opened the back door. "Two geeks in the alley."

"Take 'em out!" I ordered.

Ebony took off outside and I threw a lighter down on the chemicals. I ran out after her and ducked down behind a dumpster as we both heard smashing coming from inside the store. "I told you to run!"

"Shut up!" Ebony snapped. She grabbed my arm and we took off running to the pickup. The sun was starting to set as we took off down the road, we'd gottan almost down the street before I heard the explosion tear through the streets. "You're a bloody WMD, you know that, right?" Ebony shouted out the window.

"I get told that a lot," I grinned. "So what's in the bag?"

"I told you we should get something for the guys," she laughed.

"So we could have died and you were thinking about looking pretty?" I rolled my eyes.

"Girl's gotta have her priorities," Ebony grinned.

I laughed. "Just get us to the cruiser. I wanna go home."


	38. Chapter 38

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**++++++ I'm gonna try for one more tonight but if I don't get another out I'd like to wish all my amazing fans a VERY Merry Christmas and I hope you're all safe with family this holiday season ++++++ **

**Thirty-Eight**

It took us just over a day and a half to get back to the prison purely because we chose not to bunk up for the night. When we returned, we found that we hadn't been the only people to go out on a little scavenger hunt. Someone had taken the Tucson to King's County on a weapons run judging by the ammunition that was being taken out the back.

"MAMA!" Jade shouted at the top of her lungs as she came running out with Sophia, Fluffy and Ollie. Spirit came yelping out and pretty much crashed straight into me as I knelt down to pick him up.

"This certainly is home," Ebony grinned as she hugged her daughter. "Were you good for Daryl and Aunty Carol?"

Jade nodded. "Yes, mama. Mama, guess who came whilst you were away?"

"Who?" Ebony asked.

"Andrea," Sophia whispered. "She came to speak with Rick and try and make him have a truce with us. The adults don't think we know but we do."

"Andrea was here?" I frowned.

Sophia and Jade nodded.

I put Spirit down on the ground and walked back inside to the cell block as Rick was deep in discussion with Daryl, Herschel, Merle, Michonne, Maggie, Carol and Glenn. "Did we miss anything?" I asked coming into the common room. "I heard we had a guest whilst we were away, sussing out our defenses is she?"

"Andrea justifies that attack on the prison," Rick answered coldly.

Oh, ouch man.

"We got some supplies if anyone wants to come out and help," I suggested. "Clothes, some food, gas, medical supplies, more arrows-I got a new bow. It's Christmas."

"Go on," Rick nodded.

Everyone accept Herschel stood up and hurried off outside leaving me and Rick.

"Can we talk?" I asked Rick as I followed him to the cells.

"You made your answer pretty clear," Rick frowned.

"This world is so fucked, so upside down, so chaotic," I argued. "I've always thrived on chaos which is why I'm such a good soldier. I'm frightened of stability Rick."

"Stability?" he laughed. "There is no stability in this world."

"If we end up staying here then yeah," I argued back, "there is. We could be here a long time and I certainly never expected for any of this to happen. I never thought I would hook up with someone like you. I expected to just keep going until I died, not be what I am now."

"And what are you now?" Rick asked me.

"I'm thriving," I answered. "With you and Judith, Ebony and Jade, Carl, all of you-I'm thriving. I've not good at thriving on positive emotions. I'm a student of chaos theory, Rick. I'm frightened, it doesn't mean that I love you any less."

Rick stared at me. "PJ-Love me any less?" he quoted.

"Oh shut up," I growled. "You know what I mean, Rick."

He shook his head. "You're such a moron, PJ. But if it makes you feel any better, I'll leave it alone for now."

I rolled my eyes. "Of course I'll move in with you Rick. Bloody hell, who knew relationships could be so damn complicated?"

Rick pulled me in for a kiss.

"Sophia said that Andrea was here," I frowned, changing the subject as we both went outside to help with the supplies. "What did she want?"

"A truce between Woodbury and us," Rick replied. "She set up a meeting at an feed shop between here and Woodbury."

"You're not really considering it are you?" I demanded. "Rick, my brother is the one pulling the strings. This is a test of our weaknesses and to measure us up before they rip us apart. John's specialty was enemy infiltration."

"I have to at least try," Rick sighed. "I want you to stay here and look after everyone whilst I'm gone."

I shook my head. "No!"

"Daryl and Herschel will be with me," Rick objected.

"I'm coming," I informed him. "There is no way in hell I will let you go without more backup. You need a soldier and I am the best, Daryl matches me in skill but Herschel is an old man with one leg."

"I'm not arguing with you about this!" Rick snapped. "I want you to stay here and defend if we come under attack. This is a partnership and partnerships are about listening and understanding."

"Well understand this!" I spat, "I am not letting you go alone. I am coming with you whether you like it or not." I moved away from Rick and headed to the pickup for my new bow and arrows.

"PJ!" Rick called after me.

I heard him following me and I turned to face him. "Rick Grimes, you need to know one thing about me and one thing only-I do not let people I love waltz openly into a trap. I am not going to stay here and man the fort because I'm not that type of person."

"PJ, please," Rick pleaded, "I don't want you or Matthew to get into a fight with your brothers. I can't afford to lose my best."

"You can't afford to keep your best out of the game," I replied. "But if that's what you want-I'll stay."

He smiled. "Thank you."

I turned from him before he could say anything else. There was no way in hell I was gonna let him go on his own with one capable soldier as backup.

"Trouble in paradise, little sis?" Matthew grinned when he walked away with a box in his hands.

"Bite me," I snapped. I slammed open the box and pulled the bow out along with the tools I needed to change the specs to suit my old bow. As I fiddled in the back of the pickup, Ebony came up beside me reloading her assault rifle looking like she was one argument from having steam blowing out of her ears. "What happened to you?"

"Daryl's going with Rick to meet the Governor," Ebony growled. "It's only gonna be Daryl and Rick and old Long John Silver over there, that's not a tactical backup."

Didn't I know it?

I nodded my agreement and continued working on the bow.

"When I asked Daryl to go with him he said no," Ebony continued. "Threw some macho bullshit at me and said I should stay here with you and look after the prison."

"Well we're not," I announced in a whisper. "Get your shit together, Rick said this meeting was at a food store nearby. You and me are gonne get there first as suss the place out. I trust them just about as much as I trust a walker when I'm bleeding to death."

"What will you tell Rick?" Ebony asked.

"We're going to do a perimeter sweep," I answered. "He is technically leaving me in charge so he can't stop me."

Ebony grinned. "Yes ma'am. I'll go get changed."

"Bring me a change of clothes, I'll change in the tower," I shouted out after her.

"You ok?" Matthew asked as he came back for some more boxes.

"I'm leaving you in charge," I told him.

Matthew frowned. "Why? It's not like I'm not happy to be the man in charge but why? Rick just said you're in charge."

"Eb's and I are going on a perimeter check," I answered. "Glenn said that Tyrese and his people came in through the tombs so we want to see where they came in. Also the fact that there are walkers in the tombs could be a big problem in the future."

Matthew smirked. "If that's what you want me to tell the others instead of the truth I can go with that." He grabbed a couple of bags and nudged me a little as he walked passed me.

"Got your clothes," Ebony called out. She threw some clothes at me and I caught them just in time. Sitting on the top was a pair of blood red and black frilly underwear and a matching bra.

"Really?" I asked her. "You willingly parted from your bag of pretty lingerie?"

Ebony punched me in the arm. "Go get changed!" she ordered me.

I gave her a half-assed salute and took my ass over to the tower to change. I was tired and honestly a little cranky but these days I'm having trouble not enjoying myself.


	39. Chapter 39

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC ++++++**

**Thirty-Nine **

It took us just over two hours to get to Verlin's Feed and Seed Co but when we arrived I found it a wet dream of snipers nest and vantage points. Right across from the barn where Rick and the Governor were to have their meeting there was a grizzly looking abandoned storage shed with an open window looking straight into the shed across the clearing.

We kept ourselves hidden from any walkers in the area as we checked to see if the coast was clear. The last thing we needed was any walkers attacking us when we weren't even meant to be here.

Rick would probably kill me when he found out I was breaking his rules but I'd rather be safe than sorry. I trusted John as about as far as I could throw the fucker.

"How long do we have to wait?" Ebony questioned, watching me as I set up the Remington.

"Shouldn't be too long," I replied. I sat the Remington down on the floorboards and laydown to check the range on the scope-it was a little out but not so much that I was unable to work with it. "Watch the staircase, last thing I need is a walker taking a chunk out of me."

"I wouldn't let that happen," Ebony answered truthfully.

"Or one of John's douchenozzels catching us, that would literally be the worst day of my life," I sighed.

When I turned around, Ebony was looking at me with a raised eyebrow. "Really? That would be the worst day of your life? Never mind the deaths of millions of people of apocalyptic proportions?"

"Well it would be bad," I answered.

"I can think of something worse," Ebony answered, "you being eaten by a walker, me being eaten by a walker."

I shrugged nonchalantly. "That would be bad." I looked back out the scope and watched as Rick drove down the overgrown driveway with Daryl and Herschel in the car. "I feel like I should have Blue Danube Waltz by Strauss playing,"

"Some what?" Ebony asked me with a laugh.

"It's the epic music that plays in like every military movie when the cavalry arrives," I tried to explain.

"You're such a dork," Ebony sighed. "Blue Danube Waltz? Seriously, I don't even know what that is. Freak."

"You're calling me a freak?" I asked her. "The woman who defied the undead just to get some lingerie? And I'm the freak?"

Ebony nodded. "Yeah, I'm calling you a freak."

I shook my head and we watched as Rick got out of the truck and walk into the barn whilst Daryl and Herschel stayed outside. Ebony and I both waited, watching patiently as a second car arrived with Andrea inside. The blonde was with two other men that I didn't know but I think that Ebony would know.

"That's Milton and Martinez," Ebony informed me.

God I'm good.

Maybe I'm a prophet.

"So what's a Milton?" I asked her.

"He's like the Governor's advisor," Ebony answered. "He's studying the walkers, trying to find out what makes them tick, that sort of thing."

I went to answer when a third car pulled up, inside was John and Michael. "Fuck me," I mumbled. I felt uneasy, the Governor had to have been here already when we arrived which meant he knew that we were here.

"Sideways," Ebony added when she saw him. "Could my life get any worse?"

"Weren't you the one who told me a moment ago that the millions of people dying because of the apocalypse was like the single worst thing in this world right now?" I smirked.

Ebony shrugged. "That was different."

"How so?" I frowned.

"It happened five minutes ago," Ebony finished.

"Yes because that was so long ago," I snorted. "I love you babe."

"Ditto, doll," she grinned.

John and Michael approached Daryl, Herschel and the others. This made me feel a little uneasy the current situation, Daryl was only one man and Herschel was just a liability. Suddenly I didn't feel as bad for sneaking out.

Andrea suddenly stormed out of the barn, she looked pissed-I doubt she had been allowed to stay inside the meeting judging by the look on her face.

The two of us watched and waited as the meeting continued. Milton was scribbling something down in a notebook and talking with Herschel, Daryl and Martinez were staring at each other whilst John glared at Daryl. If looks could kill…

"Oh no," Ebony whispered. She tapped my shoulder and pointed to the left where a small heard of walkers stumbled out of the woods. There had to be at least twenty head.

"We'll watch and wait," I ordered.

Ebony didn't say anything.

The small group of men seemed to be doing a pretty good job at taking care of the walkers which was saving us for stepping in. That's when suddenly John pushed a walker straight into Daryl, knocking him to the ground.

"PJ!" Ebony gasped. "Do something!"

"Yes ma'am," I nodded. I grabbed my bow and without a second thought I jumped out the window, landing on the small tin roof that covered the doorway and firing an arrow at the walker. Daryl looked up, surprised to see me standing there with another arrow loaded.

Ebony struck a walker in the head with her machete and kicked it off the end of the blade. When Daryl saw her his face went from surprised to angry.

"What the hell are you two doing here?" Daryl snapped.

"It's a good thing we were here," I argued back at him. "That son of a bitch threw a fucking walker at you!" I growled as I pointed at John who was looking smugly at Daryl.

Daryl punched John in the face before any more words could be said.

"Daryl!" Ebony squealed. "Daryl he's not worth it!" she tried to tell him as Daryl aimed his crossbow at John who lay on the ground laughing. "Daryl, he's not worth it!"

John laughed. "All's fair when it comes to the lovely ladies of the world," he smirked. "I just thought I'd tap her again once I taped you."

"You son of bitch!" Daryl spat.

"He's not worth it!" Ebony shouted again. She pulled Daryl away from John and let him get off the ground.

Just as John got to his feet, I punched him in the face, breaking his nose. "The words fucking moron don't even begin to describe it," I spat. "You fucking prick."

John smirked at Ebony causing Daryl to try for him again.

I pushed Daryl backwards as Ebony pulled him. "He's not fucking worth it," I warned Daryl. "Scum of the earth he is, no better than a walker."

Daryl growled at the two of us. "What the hell are you two even doing here?" he snapped.

"Skulking," I answered. "I am the night!"

Daryl glared at me. "Ebony you know better than to follow this idiot around like this!"

Ebony laughed. "PJ ain't never made me do nothing I don't wanna do," she told Daryl. "And you know…she's got that appeal being the night and all."

Daryl turned to me as I headed towards the barn. "It's daytime!" he snapped.

"Irrelevant!" I shouted back at him, a grin plastered all over my face.


	40. Chapter 40

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Forty**

Ebony and I were sitting there exchanging ideas over what was happening in the meeting, we had been so absorbed in what we were talking about that we didn't notice Andrea approach us. When Ebony shushed me and pointed out behind me I turned. "Ah-hello Andrea."

"What are you doing here?" Ebony questioned with a scowl. "Shouldn't you be inside with your boyfriend or did they kick you out?"

"That was a little nasty," Andrea frowned. "I just came over to talk."

Ebony stood up, getting herself inches away from Andrea's face. "I'm sorry if my attitude seems a little nasty but when anyone threatens my daughter I tend to get a little nasty."

"I like a good cat fight like the next man," I spoke as I stood up, "but now isn't the time to be arguing. Yes, the Governor is a prick, yes he wants us all dead, and yes Andrea is a back stabbing bitch."

Andrea glared knives at me. "What's your point?"

I shook my head. "There was no point, I was simply stating fact." I pulled Ebony back a little and stood in front of her. "But I thought that I should add that if your boyfriend touches one hair on anyone in our camp I will personally come to Woodbury and paint the walls in your blood. You got that?"

"This is ridiculous!" Andrea argued. "We were friends once!"

"Until Merle delivered Glenn and Maggie to the Governor," I answered, "then your little friends beat up Glenn and almost raped Maggie. Our friendship is so far gone it's the Russian Aristocracy."

Andrea stared at me, going over thoughts in her head.

"You say we attacked first," I continued, "I can go with that. We attacked first to get our people back. When I met you all on the farm eight months ago, you were all clinging on to that last strand of humanity. You lost it and you're no better than Randall's gang or any of the murders or rapists out there. You wouldn't have even lifted a finger to help get our people out because you're a back stabbing bitch."

"I'm trying to broker a peace here!" Andrea scoffed.

"All you're trying to do is be better than the cockroach you are," I spat. "You come into my home and threaten my people-there is no peace here. I'm a soldier, Andrea. I know how to fuck you up."

"That's not what Rick wants!" Andrea tried to argue. "Rick wants peace between us, that's what I want. I though-"

"You thought what?" I cut her off. "That because I was sleeping with Rick that I would want peace? I want peace Andrea but the best soldier knows that to get peace, sometimes blood has to be spilt, lives have to be lost, sacrifices made…I will end the Governor and John and Michael and Martinez and Milton. I will end them and I will end you."

"Come on PJ," Ebony urged with a half-assed attitude. "She's not worth it." I backed away from Andrea and the two of us sat back down against the shed wall. "I admire the way you manage to put historical references in your insults," Ebony grinned.

"Thanks," I smirked.

"They've been in there for a while," Ebony pointed out, changing the subject. "When do you think they're going to come out?"

"I'd say now," I frowned, standing back up when Rick and the Governor walked out of the barn. The men walked off towards their groups, Rick hadn't seen me yet. "Eb's?"

"Yeah babe?" Ebony answered.

I grabbed her hand. "I don't think this is going to go down to well," I whispered.

"I'm here one hundred percent," Ebony answered. "Daryl's got your back and so does Herschel. Daryl would be dead now if we hadn't been here."

I wasn't sure about Daryl but I knew Herschel had our backs. He had expressed both his gratitude and amusement with Ebony and myself, even offered to smooth things over with Rick but I declined. This was my mess.

"Any problems?" Rick questioned.

"Yeah, walkers," Daryl answered. "That son of a bitch John almost killed me when they attacked."

"If PJ and Ebony hadn't been here, a walkers would have killed us both," Herschel spoke up. "They evened out the odds."

Rick turned around to find us both standing there. He ran his hand through his hair and crossed over to us. "I told you to stay at the prison."

"Well it's a good thing I disobeyed," I snapped. "Otherwise John would have killed both Daryl and Herschel than he would have killed you followed by everyone in the prison."

"We'll talk about this when we get back to the prison," Rick scowled. "You disobeyed me, PJ. I'm disappointed in you."

"What did you expect?" I continued. "Did you expect me to sit back and play house? I am not Lori, I'm not the house keeper or the home maker, I'm a soldier. If you don't like the way I play ball, I will pack up leave. Until then, you need to stop treating everyone like they're beneath you and start treating us all like equals. This my way or the high way shit has to end."

"I'm doing this to protect us all," Rick argued.

"You're circling down the drain, Rick," I informed him. "And I'm not going down with you and neither is anyone else."

"You disobeyed a direct order," Rick repeated.

"And you'd be dead if I didn't," I spat. "When the hairs stand up on the back of my neck I tend to listen to that gut feeling, especially when there is people involved that I love." I pushed past Rick and started on my way back to the prison.

"Where you going?" Ebony called out after me.

"Walking it off or I'll stab someone living," I spat.

Ebony sighed. "Well-how's it feel?" she questioned.

"How did what feel?" I replied.

"Your very first argument," Ebony smirked.

"He was being a macho assbutt," I growled.

"These things happen in normal relationships," Ebony told me. "Couples fight. Even at the end of the world…hey have you ever had makeup sex?" she grinned.

I groaned. "You're impossible, Ebony. Makeup sex? Really? We've got a long walk back and the last thing I need is you giving me relationship advice."

Ebony rolled her eyes. "Just because you're pissed off doesn't mean you get to take it out on me. It will take us a few hours to get back so we can either do it in silence or we can do some sweeps on the way back."

I sighed. "Sorry, doll."

"It's what I'm here for," Ebony smiled. She cleared her throat, "hey, listen…when we get back to the prison will you teach me how to fight?"

I nodded. "Sure. Why?"

"Because one day I'll be without a weapon and I'll need to use my hands," Ebony replied. "I just thought that I don't wanna be helpless, I wanna be like you."

I laughed. "Like me? Oh babes, that amount of perfection cannot be emulated. I'm original, one of a kind, there will never be another like me."

"Remember that," Ebony smiled, "because when it comes down to it, you're not Lori and you never will be. It's you're quirky uniqueness that Rick loves, not Lori."

I sighed. "What would I do without you?" I asked.

"Crash and burn," she laughed. "Crash and burn."


	41. Chapter 41

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Forty-One**

When the two of us reached the prison before dark I finally realised how tired I really was. Neither of us had slept in two days now and were pretty much dead on our feet.

Matthew let the two of us back in with a quick smile at the same time he told us that we now had running water-it was cold but it was still water. So that was pretty much the first place that we went. Ebony and I went to our cells and got some clean clothes as well as some soap that we'd liberated from someone's house so that we could have a shower.

Words could not express the amount of simple joy I had at the joy of running water trickling over my skin. The pressure sucked but I think Matthew had done a good job.

Once we were showered and no longer smelling of a trash heap, I went back to my cell and grabbed my sleeping bag as well as my old duffel, I was gonna sleep in one of the towers tonight, have a think about things. Ebony reassured me that couples fights don't always last forever but I could only think of the one relationship I'd had in the past and it was a failure right from the word dot. I mean who am I kidding? Starting a relationship in the middle of the end of the world? What the hell was I thinking?

Why the fuck does everything have to be so damn complicated?

As I made my way to the guard tower with Spirit I watched as the guys drove in through the gate. Jade ran out of the cell block when Daryl got out of the car, I smiled as Daryl picked her up and planted a kiss on her tangled mess of blonde hair before he spun her around causing her to erupt into fits of laughter. I was so engrossed in the two of them that I didn't notice Carl until I walked right into him. "What the hell kid?" I jumped. "You scared the crap out of me!"

"Where are you going?" Carl questioned, his eyes searching me.

"Sleep in the guard tower," I replied. I don't think I liked being talked down by a thirteen year old boy.

"Why?" Carl inquired.

"Because I can," I replied.

"I heard Ebony telling Carol that you and dad had a fight," Carl blurted out.

Seriously? Girl can't keep her mouth shut for five minutes and I'm being lectured by a kid.

"When my mum and dad had a fight dad would leave the house," Carl told me, "or mum would lock herself in the bedroom. You guys are always telling me and the other kids that we shouldn't try and be adults so maybe you shouldn't be acting like kids."

Ok where did that come from? Cause I like it.

"That's a huge bit of wisdom for a kid like you," I frowned. "Look, Carl. Your dad is the one that's annoyed at me, I did nothing wrong short of trying to save his life."

"Did he say he was disappointed in you?" Carl asked.

I nodded.

Carl sighed. "Yeah, he does that to me a lot, too. PJ-you can sleep in the tower if you want but tomorrow he'll still be mad at you."

I stared at Carl. "How much you charging per hour, kid?"

Carl cocked his head to the side, he clearly had no idea what I was talking about. "PJ-you obviously have feelings for my dad so don't be stubborn."

"Thanks kid," I grumbled before I went past him. "But your dad is the one that got all medieval man on me. You tell him when you see him that I'm gonna be as childish as I want to be and sleep with my dog in the tower. Come on Spirit."

Spirit wagged his tail and followed me into the tower where I slammed the door behind me. Maybe Carl was right and we were being childish but I think Rick needs to stop making decisions for us and start consulting us on what is good for us, otherwise he was being a few steps away from being the Governor. When I got to the top of the tower I set up my sleeping bag and sat up on the bench to look out over the prison whilst Spirit played with his toys. I dug around in my old duffel we'd rescued from the farm until I finally found what I was looking for-the cigarettes Rick and I had liberated from the truck that day.

"Fuck yes," I grinned. I pulled a cigarette out and lit it up, when I took the first puff, my body erupted into a coughing fit as it wasn't used to smoking anymore. I looked at the cigarette and laughed to myself as my mind wandered back to when I had gone to Ebony's aunt and uncle's for dinner that first night. God they were such tossers.

* * *

_"So tell me all about yourself, Ebony," I forcefully smiled, staring across the kitchen at Ebony whilst I circled my finger around the top of my wine glass. Ebony's aunt, Mille laughed at my choice of small talk. "Something amuse you?" I asked, a scowl on my face. _

_Ebony glanced over at me, she was giving me a look that basically told me that she had definitely misjudged me to first time she met me._

_"Ebony's made more mistakes in her life than I can count," Millie replied, placing her fork down. "Drugs, alcohol, petty crime-"_

_"I cleaned up when I got pregnant with Jade!" Ebony objected, her voice only coming out in a whisper. "Yes it's true that I've made my fair share of mistakes in my life but I figure that being the best mum that I can be to Jade made everything better." _

_Her aunt didn't seem to hear her. _

_Jeff Heart looked to Ebony with a sympathetic smile and gave her a reassuring wink. _

_"Only reason that Ebony is here is because she can't stay in Sydney anymore," Millie pointed out. "If she hadn't hooked up with that low life in high school that she would be so much more like her siblings."_

_"I find that you can't judge a person on their past actions," I answered. "But when you think about it-if Ebony had not gotten together with that boy than she wouldn't have become a mother."_

_"An unwed mother," Millie pointed out. "Back in my day, women married me before getting pregnant and they didn't certainly push the father of their child in front of a car."_

_I smirked into my glass._

_"He tried to take Jade," Ebony snapped. _

_She laughed. "You're living here out of the goodness of our hearts, don't be rude."_

_I had already decided that hate this woman._

_"Ready for desert?" Millie asked. _

_I nodded. _

_"Jeff come and help me," Millie grumbled when she took all our plates._

_"You always let people talk to you like that?" I inquired once it was only the two of us in the room._

_"No," Ebony answered. "Usually I would deck anyone who did that but when it comes to Jade and putting a safe, roof over her head, I'll suck it up and swallow my pride each and every time."_

_I paused. "Come live with me," I blurted out of the blue. _

_Ebony almost choked on my juice. "What? No! I can't live with you! You hate me! You hate Jade!"_

_I shook my head. "Anything's better than this," I pointed out. "Besides, I'm on base for the next few months 9-5 then I get deployed in June so the place will be just yours. Saves me getting someone to rent it out to. What do you say?"_

* * *

From there it was pretty much amazing how quickly we became friends and how attacked to Jade I became even though I didn't like babies. Jade-now Judith was the only exception. I don't think I could bare it if I left-there was so much now that I could lose-Jade, Sophia, Ebony, Daryl, Carl, Judith…Rick. I sighed and looked over the yard just as the door opened.

"Smoking will kill you, you know," Rick pointed out.

"Not like I have much left to live for these days," I shrugged.

"Stop being stubborn," Rick grumbled.

"I could say the same for you," I replied. I put the cigarette out and turned to face him. "I'm gonna say this Rick because it has to be said-you're about two steps away from being the Governor. You can't keep making decisions for us!"

"I'm keeping this group together!" he argued.

"In case you hadn't noticed, Rick we're going an ok job without Kim Jong-il telling us what we can and can't do," I growled. I slipped off the bench and flicked the cigarette at the wall. "When you went crazy after Lori died, me and Daryl went out on a run for food, Glenn and Maggie held the fort, Beth looked after Judith, Herschel watched over and Carl had his shit together in more ways than one. We don't need a Governor, we need a council where we can sit down and discuss things otherwise we might as well be Woodbury."

"That's not fair!" he told me.

"That's about as fair as you're gonna get it, Rick," I answered back. "I don't want Dictator Rick, I want farm Rick back. Hell-I'd even settle for something in between but I won't take you like this. Share the burden of leadership Rick because if you don't start letting us chose for ourselves I will walk."

Rick stared at me. "Philomena, please. You're my god given solace right now…please don't go. I need you."

"I need to stay here right now," I answered. "You go do what you need to do." I sat back down and went to light another cigarette only to have Rick grab it and sit down beside me.

"What do you want me to do?" Rick asked me.

"Don't do anything stupid," I answered. "Ebony told me about Michonne and how much the Governor hates her-don't give her to him. Stand and fight-I'll stand by you if you step down and let a committee decide the right course of action."

Rick rubbed my knee. "I can't lose you. You keep me sane when I could have lost it." He looked at me and smiled softly. "Still want me to go?" he inquired.

I shook my head. "No, you can stay," I grinned when I pulled him in for a kiss. "Carl called us kids earlier," I informed him.

"Really?" Rick frowned.

I nodded and kissed him again. "Now, I'm doing the grown up thing and telling you I'm sorry," I continued as I started taking off my shirt.

"PJ-?" Rick asked. "What-?"

"I'm apologising the grown up way," I grinned.


	42. Chapter 42

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC's ++++++**

**Forty-Two**

For the next couple of days, Matthew and I spent as much time as we could going over every nook and cranny of both inside and outside of the prison. Using the map that we'd found in the warden's office, there was nothing we left untouched.

"I have to ask why we're even doing this," Matthew frowned once we'd come back to the warden's office. "We might not even have this place for much longer when John and the Governor come."

"I'm putting together a security team," I answered. "We're gonna keep this prison, we're not going to lose it." I circled a section of the tombs and drew a big cross through the middle. "This is where our central problem is-the tombs."

"We've been at this for days," Matthew grumbled. "We must have cleared the tombs out at least three times."

"Come on soldier," I grinned, "suck it up."

"Like you're the one to talk," Matthew laughed. "Ebony told me you deserted."

I raised an eyebrow. "So did you."

"Then what business do we have in soldiering?" Matthew questioned. "I mean-I've done things, PJ. I've done some bad things…I've killed people on the Governor's orders-I didn't like killing innocent people but I still did it." He pushed himself off the warden's desk and opened a cabinet where he produced a bottle three quarters full of whisky. "I don't think I have any business being a part of this. I argued with John about killing civilians so he took me off patrols and had me doing run around work for Milton. I was never a soldier, I was more a researcher, a mechanic. I fix things."

"You did a good job on that water system," I pointed out.

Matthew shrugged. "It'll be pointless with all this shit going on. It's fubar."

I nodded. He was right about that. "There is a plan, Matthew. We've got a plan. Trust me, brother."

"You've got a lot of faith in these people," Matthew laughed. "Especially Rick."

"He's got potential" I shrugged. I snatched the whisky bottle off Matthew and took a swig. "Only problem is if he squanders it, he's gonna be exactly like the Governor. I don't think I'm getting through to him. One moment he's with me-like one hundred percent and the next moment he just stare at me with these vacant eyes like he did the day that Lori died."

"Trust you to find relationship problems at the end of the world," Matthew laughed. "Do you think that Rick's gonna give Michonne over to the Governor?" he asked me.

I sighed. "Maybe…he might...God I hope not. I haven't gotten to know Michonne as of yet but I've seen her fight. She's good in a pinch. We didn't get to talk about it much since whenever we're alone we're usually…you know…having sex."

Matthew wrinkled his nose up in disgust and shook his head before he grabbed the bottle off me and took a sip. "Alright-we've talked enough about chicken shit-let's get back to the cell block. I wanna take another look at the water system."

"Love you, brother," I smiled.

"Love you back," Matthew grinned. "Bring the whisky with you. We can sing an old Irish drinking song on the way back."

"We're not Irish," I frowned. "Oh my God can you imagine if we were?" I laughed.

Matthew chuckled as we headed back to the cell block. "Remember how dad was always so proud that you could trace our lineage all the way back to the founding fathers? Dad was always so proud."

"What about when mum found out that grandad did a lineage search on her family and almost stopped the marriage when he found out she was Italian?" I grinned. "We could totally be someone else's kids right now."

Matthew laughed. "Nice. Speaking of someone else's kids," he added, pointing at Carl who was coming our way.

"What's up little wolf?" I questioned when we both stopped dead in the corridor.

"Something big is going on," Carl answered. "Dad can't find Michonne and Daryl can't find Merle. They're in the cell block."

Matthew and I glance at each other then took off at a run towards the cell block. We both came in just as Daryl was collecting more crossbow bolts.

"What's going on Daryl?" I frowned.

"Merle's taken Michonne," Daryl answered.

"Daryl's going after them," Ebony informed me. "Daryl and I-"

"I'd like you to come with me," Daryl cut in.

I nodded. "Sure thing, brother. Anything." Out the corner of my eye I could see Ebony fold her arms in anger and storm off but right now I didn't have the time to deal with drama. "I'll grab my bow." I turned and went to Rick and my cell to grab my bow with a supply of arrows.

"PJ?" Rick spoke up from behind me.

I turned around as I strapped my quiver on. "Yes?"

"Daryl said you're going on to bring back Merle and Michonne," Rick frowned.

I nodded. "Yup."

"You look like death, PJ," Rick frowned. "You've been up for two days cleaning out the tombs and cleaning the other cell blocks. Daryl can handle himself."

I shrugged. "D and I haven't gone out for a while. I miss being a fine tuned machine of destruction."

"Be careful," Rick pleaded with me. "I want you back."

I kissed him. "In the words of a very wise robot-I'll be back."

"You're such a nerd," he laughed.

"Yeah but I'm a hot nerd," I grinned. I kissed him again. "I'm glad you changed your mind about Michonne."

"What makes you think I changed my mind?" Rick frowned.

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Because Merle took her"

"Sometimes you're too smart for your own good, PJ," Rick reminded me.

I shrugged. "Well dumb don't last too long in this world. See you soon." I broke away and scratched Spirit behind the ear before I headed down to where Daryl was waiting.

"Let's go," Daryl urged.

"Don't get your panties in a twist," I chuckled as we headed out. "He'll go to the feed place-we can get there in a few hours." I looked over at Daryl, "after everything that's happened in the last couple of weeks I think it's safe to say that I miss this."

"You're not gonna get all girly on me are you?" Daryl asked me.

I punched him in the arm. "Me? Girly? Please say it again Daryl Dixon and I'll kick your arse."

Hopefully we could find Merle before he did something really stupid.


	43. Chapter 43

**++++++ I do not own the Walking Dead or any affiliated characters apart from my OC ++++++**

**Forty-Three**

As we walked along the side of the abandoned road Daryl and I walked in utmost silence, keeping an eye out for walkers and for any of the Governor's men. It was just like old times-old times being only a few weeks ago which in itself was hard to believe that three weeks ago Ebony was dead, Lori was alive and Rick and I were avoiding each other like the plague. We'd been on the road for a couple of hours, following the trail of dead walkers that we both assumed Merle had killed. I wasn't particularly sure of what we would do when we found Merle and Michonne but Daryl didn't look like he was in the mood to be asked. So we walked in silence.

I took the opportunity to think about things that had happened in the last year-it was hard to believe that a year ago I was at base filling out paperwork and doing drills day after day after day. We had luxuries like TV and electricity and running water but now we had fuck all. As my thoughts consumed me and my attention on everything around me was very minimal, I found myself walking straight into Daryl's back. Swearing under my breath, I stepped back and looked around him to see Michonne standing there alone, sword strapped to her back. "Daryl-"

"Where's my brother?" Daryl shouted out when he rushed towards her. "You kill him?"

Michonne shook her head. "He let me go."

"You on your way back to the prison?" I asked her.

Michonne nodded.

"He still going?" I asked again.

She nodded.

"You go back and you wait," I frowned. "Don't let anyone come after us. We can't afford more people leaving the prison. Daryl-we gotta find your brother." I patted Michonne on the shoulder and turned to run after Daryl. "Wait up!" I called out, eventually catching up to him. "Jesus, man."

"Merle's gonna try and get the Governor on his own," Daryl answered frantically.

I nodded. "I know. We'll get to him before the Governor does."

"How can you be so sure?" Daryl growled.

"I can't," I answered truthfully whilst we walked. "But I have hope, Daryl. It's all a soldier can have and that's hope."

"You're not a soldier," he pointed out. "Not anymore."

I laughed. "I can't be anything else, Daryl. I'm a soldier, I kill, I follow orders-although not very well but that's what I am. I'm not a poet, I'm not a nurse or a lawyer or a doctor-I'm a soldier. I gotta hope for something."

"We end up having way too many of these moments," Daryl frowned, after more silence.

I raised an eyebrow. "What kind of moments?"

"Chick moments," he grunted.

"Ah," I laughed. "Well, in the spirit of these chick flick moments we're having, I'd like to point out that Ebony wasn't happy with being left out of this little party."

He sighed. "I noticed. Look-I love her-don't get me wrong, but she's not a fighter."

"I dunno," I shrugged. "She kicked ass in Atlanta and she took down walkers at the feed place when John almost killed you. Eb's a fighter."

Daryl shook her head. "She wanted to rush out and come with me-leave Jade and come help me find Merle. I don't know what we're walking into. I told her she couldn't come."

"Ebony's pretty stubborn," I reminded him. "She's gonna hold this against you."

"As long as she's safe, I don't care," Daryl shrugged. "I would have come on my own, PJ. If you wanted to stay with Rick and Carl and Judith, I wouldn't hold it against you."

I laughed. "Rick pretty much knows by now that I won't back down when it comes to helping people. That and he can't tell me what to do, more like suggest and just be happy with the outcome-it's the feed place," I spoke, changing the subject as I pointed out to the complex of buildings and sheds a head of us.

As soon as I pointed it out, the two of us armed ourselves and headed into the complex.

The place was littered with walkers-both dead and alive. We took them out one by one with expertly placed arrows by bow and crossbow. God it was good to be fighting with just us. When the two of us came to the meeting place, the last few walkers were too busy eating from the dead. I found it ironic that this place was called a feed store but now wasn't the time.

One of the dead, I recognised as one of the survivors that had found their way into the prison. He'd been shot-most likely by Merle. There was blood and guts everywhere, the walkers didn't seem to take notice as they tore through their food. Daryl shot a walker in the head and continued on, pulling out another arrow. In front of us there was a walker eating on the flesh of one of the dead Woodbury soldiers, as we got closer, the walker looked up.

I froze when I saw that it was Merle. "Fuck me sideways," I whispered. I turned to Daryl but he wasn't focused on anything else-just Merel, or what was left of Merle. I couldn't say anything that would make anything better. Just stay silent.

Merle stood up and stumbled over the body he was eating so that he could come towards us.

Daryl stepped backwards, I could hear silent sobs coming from him. He pushed Merle away from him but he just kept on coming, he pushed him again and again but the walker was only focused on one thing-food. Finally, he stabbed him in the chest before the two of them tumbled to the ground. Daryl slammed his knife down into Merle's head, killing him again and again and again as he continued to stab him.

Jesus.

This must have been what I looked like when I thought that I had killed Ebony and wanted nothing more than to be left alone, so I just stood back and watched him breakdown. There was nothing that could be done.


End file.
